


Calibrating Relations

by Kukolnyy (MelinyaValerian), MelinyaValerian



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Multi, Slow Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-08
Updated: 2019-09-27
Packaged: 2019-11-09 09:03:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 51
Words: 74,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17998895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MelinyaValerian/pseuds/Kukolnyy, https://archiveofourown.org/users/MelinyaValerian/pseuds/MelinyaValerian
Summary: Tali'Zorah is a Computer Science student on the Citadel, the largest city and capital of the Union, and is actually preparing for her Master's thesis with little mind for things other than studying. But as a piece of evidence in a crime investigation gets into her hands, she quickly finds herself involved with two private investigators who recently made the news in a major arrest: Jane Shepard and Garrus Vakarian.This story is set in an alternate universe where all ME characters are humans.--- Currently on hiatus ---





	1. Beginnings - Burn the Bridges (Garrus Vakarian)

**Author's Note:**

> This story started out with a simple prompt about Tali and Garrus as humans and the idea of Garrus in a trenchcoat. Then, I thought I make it a short story of these two falling in love.  
> About a year later it evolved into a complete Alternate Universe and a rather slow burning romance... because why make it simple if you can make it a novel :D  
> There will also be other pairings to the side, but Garrus and Tali are the main focus. I rated this story as M because there are a few scenes in it that contain violence, but violence is not a main theme here.  
> I left out a few explanations on the rules of the AU in order to prevent that the story feels clunky. I think it's easy to understand as it is, but if you want to know more about the rules of this AU, I posted something [about this on my tumblr.](https://kukolnyyvalerian.tumblr.com/post/183315035946/what-if-they-were-all-humans-introductory)  
> The Golden Rule here is that all characters are humans, and that the story plays in 2017 with all the technical limitations our real world faces.

“Well... I guess it's 'good night' then”, says Shepard.

She has a towel under her arm and a little grin on her face, stands in what is the door to the bathroom.  
_Their_ bathroom.  
It's a little odd because a week ago, he wouldn't even have thought about this. All of this. And now here he is, in the Upper Wards on the Citadel in a flat share with Shepard; and not in his apartment in Cipritine.

And not a police officer any longer.

Sometimes, all things happen at once just as the saying goes; that's the way the universe works.

“Yeah, I guess you're right”, he says to Shepard, moving past her towards what is supposed to be his room. “So... good night, Shepard.”

“Night, flatmate”, she replies, her grin changing into a smile. She steps back into the bathroom and nearly has the door closed behind herself as she tears it open again with full force. “Eh... Garrus?”

“Yes?”

“I don't know how sound-proof this flat is and your room is next to the bathroom...”

“... if your showers don't take up more than two hours I'm going to be fine.”

She makes a vague motion with her head, as if she's considering to tell him that her shower would actually take half a day, just to see how he reacts. But then, she grins again.

“Are you an early bird?”, she says. “Because I am. And I shower in the morning, too.”

That's the thing about being flatmates, most likely. That they'll kind of get attuned to each other's odd quirks and habits. And rising hours. And diet. He's thought about this, but only briefly. It hasn't actually occurred to him as a real issue yet.  
“I get up early, yes. Usually take a run then, but since I haven't exactly figured out where the best places are yet, I think tomorrow I'll be taking a walk instead.”

“There's a little park a few streets away. I wanted to take a run, too. At 6?”

He doesn't ask himself why she's just decided they'd run together, because that's how Shepard works and he's found out he doesn't mind.

“Fine with me.”

“Okay, great!”, she says, and she's nearly beaming. She's really excited about this, happy even. Back when they've first met, she hasn't smiled half as much. “Then... again. Good night!”

It's oddly relaxing to know she's so enthusiastic about this. “Night.”

As the door closes behind himself, the world suddenly becomes silent, and so much more like it used to be back in his apartment in Cipritine. Not counting that it doesn't look like his apartment in Cipritine, not at all.

It isn't furnished, for one. There's only a bed (well – a mattress, but he isn't picky in that regard), a few cardboard boxes with some of his belongings and his suitcase. He has a few things still in Cipritine that he could take here; two desks, for example, he'd put them under one of the large windows.

But for the moment, it's rather... empty.

Shepard came to him on Thursday, with an offer to join her detective agency. And an offer to share a flat in the same building that – two levels lower – housed her ( _their_ , he reminds himself) new office.  
It was tempting, of course. Shepard and he worked together before, on a case that's all over the media now: the arrest of the Citadel politician Saren Arterius, who used to have his fingers in every kind of dirty business imaginable; but worst of all, used to smuggle weapons. Shepard, a PI already back then, got onto the case through the daughter of Arterius' private assistant Benezia; a young historian by the name of Liara T'Soni. She hired Shepard to keep an eye on her mother, who was behaving strangely at that time, or more strangely than usual if Liara was to be believed.

Garrus himself got involved in the case through a trivial matter – Arterius originally hailed from Palaven, and Garrus used to be a cop in Palaven's capital Cipritine. And one of Arterius' old military buddies got into some traffic offence, and Garrus investigated; and did it thoroughly. One loose end lead to another, and it didn't take long until he suspected that this military buddy was actually an arms dealer. Not that he had much evidence, which then lead to Cipritine's Commissioner Pallin personally cancelling all of Garrus' investigations.

Garrus couldn't stand it. There was something _big_ , right under his nose, something that screamed at him that it needed investigation and then – just because he worked as a traffic cop at that time and Arterius was a _politician_ , the case was closed. Not enough evidence, Pallin said. As if evidence was everything – he could have produced it with a few days more time.

And he did, but on his own. He took a long-due vacation, went to the Citadel, crossed paths with Shepard. They became partners, initially just for that one case.  
Even though Benezia fed them inside information after their first confrontation, it took them three weeks and a shooting in the middle of the Presidium to get to Arterius. Unfortunately, Benezia was caught in the crossfire, and died as Arterius shot her in the back. After the shooting, however, C-Sec finally listened to them and arrested him.  
But from a standpoint as an investigator, those three weeks felt far better than a lot of weeks before that. Nobody who gave them orders, nobody who wouldn't tell them why a certain lead needed to be dropped, and nobody who he had ever respected more than Shepard. She's a formidable talker, nearly a psychologist in how she understands people. And she's a former soldier, and a great one at that, multiple awards, nearly spotless service record. Of course, that comes with baggage enough for a lifetime, too. Now, he has his own demons, his own past; but even in that, he and Shepard understand each other. She saw something in him, something that his own father, and Pallin, apparently don't see any more.  
So when she came to him on that Thursday, he wasn't as reluctant to take her offer as he should have been. He went to work like usual on Friday, but the thought was still on his mind, never left him. On Saturday, he came back to the Citadel, visited the flat and the office with Shepard, listened to her plans.

When he drove back on Sunday, he had already decided, and a little part of him that was maybe exactly like he should have been to be his father's son made him uncomfortable because the decision was too easy.

When he met his father on Monday morning, and they had an argument again in the middle of the police station, the tiny bit of regret at the simple decision just went up in smoke. He resigned, handed his father his weapon and badge and left. Went back home, started packing his things.

Met his sister later that day, fought with her about his 'rash decision' and about all the stuff in his career that didn't go as expected.

She shouted at him that he was running away.

He went to the Citadel anyway the next morning.

And now, Tuesday evening, he sits on his bed in a flat on the Citadel with his new flatmate showering in the room behind him. Back in Cipritine, he's burned bridges and it's not that he doesn't know that. He's crashed things, disappointed people. Like he always does, if he is honest with himself.

He hasn't called his mother yet, and he dreads that talk. Still, he'll need to have it tomorrow.  
Then there're things to do; like furnishing an office, applying for a license, bureaucratic stuff, giving notice to his landlord in Cirpritine that he'll quit the flat.

And on the weekend, he'll get his remaining stuff and leave Cipritine behind for good, may it be running away or the fresh start that he knows he needs. He's not doing this by halves.  
Maybe things won't crash and burn here, and one thing in his life will go right, just this once. Shepard's enthusiasm is certainly motivating.


	2. Beginnings - Inconspicuous (Tali'Zorah vas Neema)

“I see you've been busy again“, Tali says. She's standing in the little kitchen niche of her cousin's trailer, in between dirty dishes and soup cans that look at least a week old. It's nothing unusual with Veetor. What startles her, though, is the bucket full of junk that is almost neatly placed on the stove.

Veetor himself though doesn't answer her question. She looks over to him to find his attention entirely focussed on the new big Rubik's cube in his hands, turning its parts and matching colours. It's a seven by seven cube; Tali's come across it on Silversun Strip and couldn't resist. Veetor loves Rubik's cubes. The shelf with his collection is behind the little sofa, and probably the only part of his dwelling that doesn't look like – to be frank – a pig sty.

Sometimes, it's not easy trying to establish a conversation with her cousin, but after a few months of living in the same town, Tali slowly gets used to it. And after today, he definitely deserves it to relax a little. “Veetor?“, she asks again, carefully.

As an answer, she only hears the noise of the cube's joints moving. He's going to get there, eventually. He probably just needs to solve the cube first; what, given his experience with these puzzles, can't take that long. In the meantime, she can at least get rid of the smelly stuff.

Veetor's trailer has been parked in the absolute outskirts of the Tonbay since two days, where the quarter already nearly resembles a village. It's only a few streets away that the large buildings start; huge prefabricated houses raised about 50 years ago, when the Quarian tribes began to settle down. The Tonbay, just like the Neema and all other Quarian quarters, still doesn't look as if it belongs to the town it has been build on; the Citadel in this case. Back in her own home, the Rayya, which technically belongs to the town Illium farer in the north of the country, it isn't very different. And maybe they aren't really meant to live this way, anyway; in old farmhouses, trailers, huge compounds made from metal and concrete; so close to the big cities and not yet belonging to them. Maybe they have been nomads for too long after they lost their home country to a foreign invasion three and a half centuries ago.

But the Quarian society and their leaders make it clear that the system as it is now is not a final solution. They just stopped moving around to focus their efforts on regaining their home country, which has deteriorated to a jungle over the last centuries. The invaders still live there, away from the rest of of the civilised world. For this purpose, the Quarian people are preparing themselves. Companies are founded, knowledge is amassed, people are trained; while it is made sure that the dependency on the host towns doesn't grow. Quarians have their own community, their own government, their own hospitals. Their own traditions.

Even so, the Quarian teenagers are expected to learn at the so-called normal Universities to broaden their knowledge and own horizon. When they come back, they have gained skills that can be of use, and are considered adults by the Quarian society. Some people still call this a Pilgrimage, as it evolved from a tradition of their ancestors that had the same name.

Tali has already completed her own Pilgrimage after she studied Engineering in Thessia, but she decided for a second Master's degree in Computer Science and has relocated to the Citadel for this. Veetor is currently on his Pilgrimage. He has moved from the Neema in the West of the Citadel to the Tonbay in the South, lives in a trailer that his father had to spare, and is currently desperately trying to find a job or a place at a college, which isn't the simplest task for him.

He's still working on the Rubik's cube as Tali gets back into the trailer. He looks calmer now, though, maybe due to the cube distracting him or due to his meds. Maybe both. He's called her around lunchtime and asked if she can fetch him from work – he's currently trying himself out as a youth worker, after having already tried out being a cook, a delivery boy, and a dozen other jobs that he couldn't keep longer than a few days, weeks at best.

It's a bit of a worry for Tali and her aunt, and they have actually thought that the work with other people would be of benefit for Veetor. Because despite being probably not the most socially intelligent person, Veetor likes people and likes helping them, and having changing tasks like a youth worker has would be good for him to keep his interest in the job alive.

However, maybe direct work with people has been a little too soon. It seemed to work fine at first, Veetor's genuine personality has quickly won him friends amongst the younger children. But today, some of the older children played a prank on him that involved locking him in a windowless room for some time. To say that it has been upsetting for Veetor would be an understatement. He's called Tali while she's been at University, and she immediately went to fetch him. She's also given these bosh'tets that played the prank in the first place a huge piece of her mind but she doubts it will change anything on the long run.

They probably would need to talk about the job, either today, or maybe tomorrow when things have settled a little.

“Finished“, Veetor announces, more to himself than to anyone else, smiling a bit. And indeed, the cube is solved.

“Congratulations“, she says carefully.

He jumps a bit and looks up to her. “Tali? Oh yeah. Right. Sorry, I was… distracted. Thanks for the cube, it's great!“

He seems better now, his eyes are glowing brighter again and his breathing is normal. He isn't sweating any more, either. When she sees that he's also grinning a very little bit, happily throwing and catching his new Rubik's cube, she gives him a warm smile.

“No problem. I saw you've been collecting some old parts again, haven't you?“

Veetor's eyes dart through the room as if she's telling him news, but widen when he follows her hand towards the bucket. “Oh that, yes”, he says, and weasels through the room, gets the bucket and goes back to his bed.

And proceeds to tip it out right onto his sheets. A quick: “Veetor, don't…!”, from her goes entirely unnoticed.

Her fears have been right, though, there are parts in the bucket which are daubed with oil.

“You need to change the sheets later”, she just say as Veetor looks first to her and then to his bed and mutters a quiet “Oops...”

“Don't panic, I'll remind you.”

“Uh… yeah”, he stammers, scratches his head with a dirty hand. She doesn't comment on it. “Well, I… I collected that stuff at the scrapyard before I moved the trailer.”

With his head probably already half at dismantling all the pieces, he goes down onto his knees in front of his bed. The Rubik's cube is lying on his pillow.

“Anything useful?”, she asks, goes down onto her knees, too.

She wouldn't have chosen the bed for it, but she surely wants to know what little gems Veetor has dug up this time. If there's any interest and passion that they share, it's technical stuff, gadgets and programming.

“Is that a tailpipe?”, she asks a little into their silent assessment of all the pieces and parts. She's turning it in her hands, there sure are a lot of parts missing; the cat-back, the header, even more pipes; but the basic shape is unmistakable.

Veetor only spares her a very short glance. He's tinkering with an old digital watch, already has the display open and looks at the circuits. “Yes”, he says, “I like the form.”

“And it's chromed.”

“Yes, very shiny.”

“The car was probably pretty expensive”, she mutters, a little dismissive, and puts the pipe away. She doesn't get why people are so fond of their cars.

There's a few broken cables in Veetor's loot, too; likely so he can cut down the isolation and extract the copper, and also a pair of broken earphones. Lots of other pieces are simply that; metal pieces, screws and the like, partly rusty, partly just simply dirty.

The most interesting find lies inconspicuously under the motherboard of a very old computer. It's a digital camera, and – as far as Tali can tell by looking at it – it's mostly intact, though the display and the lens are both broken.

“It's a shame what people throw away these days”, she says as she takes a look at it. “This could've been repaired. Pretty easily, too.”

“If you've got the right spare parts”, Veetor mutters. He's not looking up from his watch, and Tali is actually a bit pleasantly surprised that he listened to her at all. “Heard lenses are expensive.”

“Not when you know where to buy them. But instead of bothering, people just throw it away and it lands on a scrapyard.”

She wants to see if it's really working, checks for the batteries.

“It's not from the scrapyard. I found this in a trash can down in the Lower Wards”, Veetor says, still focussed on his watch. “It just caught my eye when I saw Mou---” Then, as if remembering what he just said, Veetor suddenly shuts up, becoming even more deeply engrossed with the watch.

Tali takes in a long breath, looks at her cousin carefully. “You tell me if you need anything”, she says then, deciding to leave it at that for the moment despite fully knowing what her cousin has just been about to say.

“Sure thing”, Veetor mumbles.

Tali shakes her head a bit, they don't need a story like that one last year again. But she needs to trust Veetor on that, and now it's probably better she gets back to the batteries of the camera. They're still there, but so is something else. “Hey, whoever threw this away left the SD card inside”, she says.

This time, Veetor doesn't react.

She closes the lid again, looks for the power button. The damage to the display isn't so severe that she wouldn't see anything on it. She's not surprised at all when the camera comes back to life just so.

There's not much on the SD card, only a video file.

But that alone is enough to make her heart drop down into her stomach.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is it - the first two chapters! Now you got to know my versions of Garrus and Tali in this AU. I'd love to hear your opinions on this!  
> I also want to thank everyone who's helped me with this; especially my awesome beta-reader TalinMirengo (who's also responsible for this wonderful title; so thanks again :)) and my beta-listener :D Your help has been invaluable, especially on the first few chapters.


	3. Beginnings - Getting Settled (Garrus)

It takes Garrus about two months until all the paperwork is done and he's got his license as a private investigator. In the meantime, he ‘officially' does the paperwork for Shepard, while unofficially, they've already settled into a routine of who does what when a case comes around.

Shepard is terrible with technical stuff, so he's doing all the deep research in databases and the like, maintains the tracking devises, the cameras. Gets them a few good computers, too. Shepard does all the work involving persons, talks to the clients mainly, focusses on figuring out people's motifs, interprets body language. They collect evidence, each in the way they do best, and over dinner, they puzzle the pieces together on a whiteboard Shepard has in her room. It's slowly taking form, and these case-solving-dinners are probably the best part of it.

And he has a real bed now, that's also good. And a wardrobe. And a cactus from Solana. She's visited two weeks after he moved, and they've mended things – at least they've tried to. A lot of things are still at sixes and sevens with his family, but it's easier not to think of it. The anger he feels when he thinks of his father starts dying down, too, which is probably a good thing.

Things start to go up, at least he feels like that. Most of the time.

When there isn't a crying person in their office, lamenting that their spouse is cheating on them. Shepard says they need to take on every case to build a reputation and pay the bills. And logically,… _logically_ , he agrees. On the other hand, though… it's worse than being a traffic cop.

There's a middle-aged woman in their office right now, she's a bit on the plump side and wears a rather garish flowery dress. Apart from that dress and her currently rather tear-stained face, she's not really what he'd call homely, even if she's already proclaimed exactly that at least four times. She's currently crying into Shepard's shoulder, who gently pats her back and mutters: “There, there. Let it all out, Mrs. Giles.”

At least that gives Garrus some time to let out a sigh and roll his eyes to nobody but himself without anyone noticing. He's stayed tight-lipped on the matter at hand so far – apparently, Mr. Giles is indulging in an early midlife-crisis and Mrs. Giles has had enough of his frequent, unexplained absences.

This is definitely not what he endured college for.

Patient, he needs to be patient.

And so, while Mrs. Giles does her best to drown Shepard in her tears, he does something useful, looks Mr. Giles up on the internet. It's a simple task, but at least, it keeps him busy.

Moments crawl by and the crying is slowly reduced to a background noise as Garrus becomes more and more engrossed in Mr. Giles' small business website. They have a good web-designer, he has to give them that. For a traditional bakery, at least.

The background noise suddenly bursts into a, “I bet it's his secretary, that blonde bitch!”, that definitely destroys his focus for a moment. He'd prefer not to, but he knows he has to pretend to be all ears, so he turns his head a tiny bit towards the woman.

She's left Shepard's shoulder behind, has her fists clenched now and looks ready to jump off their sofa any second. “So young, so _pretty_ ”, Mrs. Giles spits, “Hangs on Randy's every word, and the way she laughs! Like a drunken siren! _Ahahahaha.”_

It's a terrible imitation of an even more terribly artificial laughter. Garrus suddenly feels the urge to go to the shooting range in the evening. Stress relief.

“And he's _always_ stared at her bust, how could he not when she's always wearing _those_ blouses...”

There are things he doesn't want to know; and it's not particularly calming that those are the things he needs to figure out because it's his job now.

Shooting range.  _Think of your Mantis, Garrus._

“That's the kind of thing men fall for, isn't it?!” And to make matters even less pleasant, Mrs. Giles seems to have taken notice of him and nearly shouts those words at him as if he's personally responsible for her husband's… wandering eyes.

He just stares at her in bewilderment for the fraction of a second. “You don't need to shout, Mrs. Giles”, he says. Multiple people have told him that he usually sounds rather calming, not that he could judge that. “I surely don't know what your husband finds attractive.”

That's definitely on the list of sentences he never expected to have to say.

“Well… busty isn't bad”, says Shepard from behind Mrs. Giles, who now turns around to her, a little confused herself.

Shepard winks at him over their client's shoulder and he sighs and shakes his head a bit.

“But other things are far, far better. Caring, for example. And honesty. And an attractive way of laughing”, Shepard says. “And getting breasts shoved into your face is pretty… disturbing, actually.” Garrus doesn't quite understand how she can still smile, but she does.

“If Randy'd only think so”, Mrs. Giles replies. She sounds close to tears again. Speak of mood swings.

“What tells you he doesn't?”, Shepard says. “Or that you maybe… misjudge this secretary? How long have you been married, Mrs. Giles?”

“Fifteen years...”

“That's not something I'd just waste for any blonde secretary, busty or not.” Shepard gently takes Mrs. Giles' shoulders, beacons her to get up.

It's going to end soon, praise the Spirits.

“How about we look into the case, and give you a call as soon as possible. Maybe we can already give you an all-clear in a few days.”

“That fast?”, says Mrs. Giles, she sounds suspicious.

“We're simply good”, says Shepard, a little like a cheeky teenager and winks at Mrs. Giles now. It seems to work. “We can talk about the pay later.”

“Thank you”, their client says, sniffs and wipes a few tears away before she, too, tries a smile. “Goodbye, Ms. Shepard.”

Mrs. Giles sends an apologetic smile his way, as well. He nods in return.

“You're doubling as psychiatrist here, Shepard”, he mutters once the door behind Mrs. Giles is closed.

Back in his days as a traffic cop, he could at least tell himself that he did something useful for the community, as any good citizen of Palaven should. That has usually left a bittersweet taste in his mouth, because he's anything but a good citizen of Palaven as Commissioner Pallin liked to highlight. But at the very least, it's been _something_. Finding cheating spouses… does not at all qualify as community service.

“Word's going to get around soon and we'll get other jobs, I'm sure”, says Shepard after she's seen the client out and notices him massaging his temples. “Something more like...”

“… the Saren-Arterius case?”, he replies as her tone drifts off. He's learned to read her a bit better, she doesn't like those cases they do now, either. She's just better at being patient.

“Well… we started out pretty big, didn't we?”, she says after a small pause, grins at him and starts crossing the room in the direction of their small kitchen niche. “Makes sense it can't go on like that forever. And we had that robbery last weak, don't forget that.”

“Right. But when shoplifters are your silver lining...”, he says, lets his voice trail off, too. But he gets up from his office chair, anyway, follows Shepard to the kitchen.

Time for a coffee, a really strong one.

Shepard laughs a bit. “Just you wait, Garrus. One day, there's going to be a big fish that marches right through that door.”

“Swims.”

“Huh?”

“Big fish. They rarely march, they swim.”

She slaps him on the arm for that, but at least, they have a laugh as the coffee machine starts running.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Subtitle of this chapter: Torture Your Garrus.


	4. Beginnings - In the Wrong Hands (Tali)

Nothing about this situation is good, nothing at all.

She's sitting in her room now, Veetor's camera find next to her. She's running some software diagnostics on the SD card in her laptop; trying to figure out if someone has already tried to mess with it. The time stamp seems corrupted and it's security camera footage, definitely not recorded with this camera.

Veetor has had a mild panic attack seeing it, it certainly would have been stronger if he wouldn't have already taken his medicine. She's done her best to calm him down further and called a friend of his to check on him later that evening, and promised him to take care of the matter with the SD card. Or, more precisely, the matter with the video on the SD card.

Because it shows masked goons vandalising what looks like a run-down restaurant, in an effort to rob it, probably. But there is something about the way one of the goons talks to the owner, something that just looks so familiar that it's almost uncanny. And then, after two minutes of awful, but simple, property damage, one of the goons suddenly pulls out a gun and shoots at a waitress, nearly out of nowhere.

She definitely needs to figure out where this came from, though she has no idea what she wants to do with it when she has it. Or any idea how this footage ended up in a digital camera in a trash can in the Lower Wards. It's almost as if someone wanted it there, it looks far to contrived to be an accident.

Her aunt (well… kind of aunt) knocks at her door some time later, making her realise that her staring at the video has already taken her several hours. She has a course in the morning, she should go to bed, or at least join auntie Raan for a late dinner.

Half-hesitating and still agitated, she decides to keep this secret from her aunt for the moment, even if she, as a lawyer, might be able to help Tali. She still goes to have a snack, at least as an alibi.

Auntie Raan of course notices that Tali is a little out of it today, and Tali doesn't feel very good when she says that it's nothing. She doesn't like lying to anyone.

But somehow, the video and what she's seen on it is etched onto her mind. Technically, this is stuff for C-Sec. But then again, they are Quarians.

Auntie Raan might have made it into the Embassy quarters with her office, might have gained enough reputation that she even has quite a few non-Quarian clients. But this is just an exception to the rule, one that some people on both sides have issues with. Quarians want to be as self-reliant as possible, have to be, too, because everyone sees them as nomads and scrap dealers. They are nothing more than guests, tolerated at best and looked down upon at worst.

C-Sec would probably not even take her seriously. And she needs to leave Veetor out of this, he's had a bit of trouble with C-Sec in the last months already. Minor issues, auntie Raan has been a big help there. Vagrancy is one of them – Veetor has inadvertently parked his trailer on a farmer's fields a few months ago. The affair has only ended with an official reprimand for Veetor, but a lot of mental stress for something that was simply an accident. The other trouble with C-Sec, however, is more severe. Next to his official medication, Veetor has a history with some less legal substances. To calm himself down, he sometimes smokes weed, especially when he feels his medicine is too strong and makes him depressed. C-Sec, of course, did not approve of this self-medication, even if it does work and Veetor has it – mostly – under control. They caught him buying weed from a dealer on the Lower Wards some time ago, and it actually resulted in a night in jail, some hours of community service, and a very furious Tali and Shala'Raan.

No, C-Sec is definitely not where the video has to go. C-Sec asks too many questions on all the wrong angles, doesn't care if the teenaged ‘vagrant' and ‘addict' is a young man struggling with his start in life. One of the officers back then actually had the gall to say to Tali's face that Veetor is a Quarian, and what else where they supposed to assume other than that he's a homeless addict?

Definitely not C-Sec. Tali feels the acids in her stomach rebelling and blood rushing to her fists when she thinks of C-Sec. And she definitely needs to keep it out of the story that Veetor found this camera when visiting the Lower Wards – the name he never finished to say back when Tali was at his trailer sounded an awful lot like 'Mouse', who used to be Veetor's weed dealer.

And auntie Raan maybe causes too much of a stir if Tali involves her. Or, even worse, gets worried for either her or Veetor.

The only thing Tali can think of right now are private investigators. There has been a big story all over the media a while ago about a private investigator named Jane Shepard who had her hands in the Saren Arterius investigation. Maybe that's where she should start.

After dinner, Tali takes some cookies and a glass of milk and goes to her room, makes herself comfortable in front of her computer and starts researching. She's not going to ask anyone for help just so, she's going to do this right. She needs to know about this Jane Shepard, needs to know about her work and methods and whether or not to trust her.

The webpage of the agency is easy enough to find, and when she finds the page's headline reading “Shepard & Vakarian: Detective Agency” she remembers there was also a Turian cop involved in the Saren Arterius case. Another person for her to research.

She digs deeper, into the database of the Alliance Military, into the database of Cirpritine's police force. She needs to be sure, reads everything she can find. Digs even deeper, reads some more.

When she finds two heavily encrypted and heavily redacted files, called 'Akuze' in Shepard's case and 'Archangel' in Vakarian's, she stops.

Maybe she doesn't need to know everything, though she could break the encryption. Maybe it's enough to know that a former soldier and a former cop are probably her best option at the moment.

She has a last look at the video, sees the waitress getting shot. She's going to take this to the investigators, somebody needs to do something about this. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so, the story begins.  
> Thanks to everyone who's visited this story so far, and thanks to the unknown someone who left a kudo :D


	5. Once Upon a Time on the Citadel - Don't Speak (Tali)

The Heavens know the last months have been hard.

Tali finds herself longing for a little moment to just be carefree, but she knows she has to be responsible. For herself, for Veetor.

But when she sits in that office that still smells like fresh paint, on a new leather sofa, facing the investigators and telling them the story with the SD card, she can't help but feel tired. It's just everything at once at times. She's lost her mother to a rare illness a few years back. Her father died eight months ago, in an accident in his company's main building. He left her the realisation that what he paid for her studies has been money that he barely even had, and that years and years of being busy, each in their own way, has left them both estranged; something she can't even fix now. It's taken her months to work through her feelings regarding her father, and she has been eternally grateful for auntie Raan offering her help. And now that everything has just settled in in one way or another, the next issue turns up. Tali still shudders thinking of the video on the SD card.

The talk with the investigators, though, has been relatively relaxed so far. The one who does the talking is Jane Shepard. She appears hardly older than twenty-five with her red hair and freckled face, but her eyes are older. She seems friendly, has a warm, deep voice that doesn't sound young at all and the way she acts helps Tali feel less out of place and less stupid for not even trying to go to C-Sec.

When Shepard – she's been told that calling her 'Shepard' would suffice – goes to get coffee, Tali is alone with the second investigator.

Garrus Vakarian hasn't talked so far, keeps silent now too; his long-fingered hands flying over the keyboard of his computer. And for a moment, it feels like the quiet is a good thing. Tali has said everything that has to be said about finding the card, well, nearly everything. She left out the bit about Veetor and the Lower Wards, and explained that Veetor found the camera on the Quarian scrapyard. Shepard seemed reassuring hearing her story – though Tali has the feeling that she suspects that Tali isn't telling the full truth. Or maybe it's just that Tali isn't at ease telling lies.

She doesn't quite know why, but now that Shepard has left the office, it feels like it's a good moment to just let her mind rest. Just until the coffee is ready, be carefree for a few minutes before she has to be an adult again. Sometimes, being twenty-three doesn't feel nearly old enough to be an adult. Years ago, as a teenager, things seemed so much easier.

And that other investigator seems more invested in his computer than in her anyway, but she is okay with that. He's admittedly not hard on the eyes. She allows her thoughts to drift away, just for a moment until Shepard comes back.

She's read in his files that Vakarian used to serve with a SWAT team, has had the best scores in all examinations, but has still never made it far carrier-wise. His file doesn't explain more, just that he left service early, and she wonders why. He doesn't look as if he has a nasty temper or something like that to her; if anything, he seems calculating and stoic, simply scrutinises her from behind his rectangular glasses. Throughout all of her story, he has kept a poker face. But the way he has folded his legs beyond the desk looks awkward, so unlike his straight, stiff back. His button-up shirt is plain, too big and in that unassuming blue colour bankers like to wear beyond their suits. It's anything but stylish, and makes him look thinner than he probably is. There are also a few golden pins on one of his breast pockets, they look a bit like military insignia. But then again, he is a Turian.

His face is rather ordinary too, if sharp and with the jaw of a nutcracker; his hair has a dull, ashen brown colour and he keeps it in an equally unassuming, short hairstyle. There's still something about him that makes her think of the easier times in which looking at cute boys was something to giggle about with her friends.

When Shepard comes back with the coffee, she thinks it might be his eyes; they're steel blue and piercing like a laser. If there's anything special about him, it's these eyes. When he says his thanks for the coffee and grins a bit, Tali thinks it could be that too; that nearly unnoticeable quirk of his lips, just a tiny break in his stoic face.

But when their talk continues, and he gets a little more involved, her carefree daydreaming comes to an abrupt end. “The waitress getting shot, that's clearly a crime. You know that a crime investigation is actually something for C-Sec, Ms. Zorah?”, says Shepard. Her voice is still warm, carefully testing the waters without hidden implications.

“I… I know, of course”, Tali answers. She feels a little twist in her stomach. “I don't want to contact C-Sec though, they never listen.”

For the first time since she's entered, Garrus Vakarian makes a sound; he coughs. “You're gypsies, am I right? One of the clans who only settled down about a generation ago?“, he says and she already wishes he'd shut up. His voice is smooth and deep, but also coldly formal. She has heard the word a million times, and it shouldn't really have an effect any more, but the way he says it – careless about the implications, or even worse, _accepting_ the implications and still using it – is irritating. “Many people still remember the times your people used to roam the lands. And your cousin who found the card, Veetor'Nara; he lives in a trailer? He's been convicted twice; once for Vagrancy and once for the Abuse of Illegal Substances. That sure doesn't give the best of impressions to C-Sec, you have to admit.“

Simple irritation doesn't begin to cover it any longer. “What you just said is wrong on so many levels!“, she says loudly, and needs to remind herself that exploding at him would hardly make the situation any better. Instead, she takes a deep breath, and tries to calmly explain that she is a Quarian, not a Roma, and that 'gypsy' is a word that he better not use at all. She avoids talking more about Veetor though. It's none of his business.

“Quarians, of course. I'm sorry”, he replies, still in a cold voice. “The point still stands that your cousin has a criminal record, though. And that your people's history has made other people mistrustful.”

“Thanks for reminding me, I nearly forgot”, she scoffs before she can stop herself. As if she doesn't know that on her own! She doesn't need a high-and-mighty bosh'tet with a stick up his ass repeating the history she grew up with.

“Well, let's get back to how we're going to deal with the situation, right?”, Shepard says soothingly as Tali exchanges a sharp look with Vakarian. Shepard is a friendly, decent woman, so much is sure. And even if she wishes that Garrus Vakarian wouldn't have destroyed her initial impression by talking, Tali finds herself at least trusting her.


	6. Once Upon a Time on the Citadel - Change of Pace (Garrus)

The 'big fish' comes marching through the door a few weeks later.

Tali'Zorah vas Neema is unquestionably young – twenty, twenty-two, maybe? – still looks a little like a teenager in her college hoodie, her long hair tied into a loose ponytail. And, also without question, she's in over her head, fast as she talks and nervous as she seems. But client is client, Shepard is right about that.

And at least, it's not adultery again.

The girl is one of the Quarians (as she so politely reminded him) who used to roam all over the land. Now, he isn't one to assume prejudices are always right. But when she complains C-Sec wouldn't listen to her and her cousin – and she says that with such fervent conviction – he internally rolls his eyes. Sure, C-Sec doesn't always work the right way from what he's heard, and almost never the fast way if it's anything like the police in Cipritine. But Tali'Zorah's half-accusatory tone reminds him of a teenager convinced that the whole world is on a conspiracy against her when the world, in fact, has a very good reason to be suspicious.

Many people still remember the times the Quarians never settled anywhere, stopped wherever they felt like it, took what they needed from what other people discarded and disrespected the laws. Many people still believe that they live in tents and trailers and that their population consists entirely of thieves, scrap dealers and dubious thugs with connections to the Russian mafia or the Krogans. It also doesn't help that all Quarian settlements are basically just suburbs of the bigger towns, a little like parasites docked onto a host town. At least that seems to be the general perception. And that cousin of hers, Veetor'Nara, just supports those beliefs by living in a trailer and getting himself arrested for substance abuse, which is a crime after Citadel law. And vagrancy is even worse. Garrus can see why this would look off, prejudices or not.

So for a moment, all that he thinks of Tali‘Zorah vas Neema is that she's one of these people on their crusade against the establishment for the wrongs her people had allegedly to endure.

He realises he is wrong when she shows Shepard and him that SD card, sees the waitress getting shot. He begins to see why she is that nervous all of the time and why C-Sec really might make everything even worse with this case and cause too much of a ruckus. Because if nothing else, he believes that neither Tali'Zorah nor her cousin have anything to do with this.

She remains very young, though, and very naive; a kid involving herself in something much bigger than her. And most of all, she remains just a client, though the first client with a case he actually thinks of as interesting and worth Shepard's and his time.  
She, however, probably doesn't see herself as _just a client_.

They are still looking at the footage and Garrus makes a mental checklist of all the things that don't add up – the missing time stamp, masked thugs vandalising a restaurant in an uncannily organised manner, security footage being on an SD card in a digital camera on a Quarian scrapyard – when Tali'Zorah's zeal bubbles over.

“I've checked for the time stamp, of course”, she says as the waitress is getting shot a second time. She starts rummaging around in her large backpack. It piques his curiosity a little, admittedly. “It's corrupted, but I ran a few programmes on it and I think I recreated it. I also ran a few filters on the video, increased the quality a bit.”

She's talking fast, and hands him a second SD card now. “You did what?”, he says.

“Ran a few filters”, she gives back indignantly. “Recreated the time stamp.”

She glares at him as if to say 'did your work for you'. He answers with raised brows and a cough. “You're studying Computer Science?”, he says in a chilly voice, but plugs the second SD card into his computer anyway.  
“Yes”, she states, full of pride.  
“Recreating evidence in a crime investigation doesn't look like your standard homework assignment to me.”

“What was I supposed to do?”, Tali'Zorah snaps. “A woman was hurt! I was just doing everything I could to help!”

Shepard clears her throat. “Yeah, thanks Ms. Zorah. It's appreciated.”  
For a moment, everything is quiet as they all stare at the edited footage. Tali'Zorah has reduced the blur a bit, increased the contrast, and the time stamp says the scene happened two days ago.

Shepard and him exchange a glance as the video is over. They both have seen enough.

“Well… we're going to deal with this further, Ms. Zorah, okay? We'll contact you in case anything important happens or we need your help again.” Shepard gets up from her chair, gestures Tali'Zorah towards the door. There is much to talk about, and even if she's clever, Tali'Zorah is a civilian.

“Wait… what?”, she says, looking back and forth between Shepard and himself. Garrus focusses back on the screen. Shepard would deal with that. “I don't want to---”

“We really appreciate that you've come to us, Ms. Zorah. Tali. But you've got to trust us with that case now, it's in good hands. We're---”

“The video was meant to be found”, says Tali'Zorah bluntly. His eyes dart up to her immediately, and even Shepard looks dumbfounded for a second. “You must have noticed that. Security footage in a digital camera, barely damaged, in the Low... on a Quarian scrapyard. It was meant to be found.”

Garrus allows himself a small sigh, eyes Tali'Zorah sharply. Shepard does the same, they both heard her little slip of tongue, but if she's going to leave it at that, so is he. That girl is quite the handful, but he has to give her that she's clever. Reminds him of Liara T'Soni, a little bit. “Quarians are known for raiding scrapyards for anything useful, Shepard. She's right. A barely damaged camera would definitely find a new owner there.”

“We apparently have an _expert_ here”, Tali'Zorah remarks into his direction, he doesn't react. Her eyes quickly go back to Shepard though, and she begins to look like an expectant kid.  
Shepard exchanges another glance with him, now he shrugs a little bit. “It's not only that”, Shepard then says. “The way these thugs move, they had training. Military. They are way too organised for your run-of-the-mill robber.”

“And the way they vandalise that restaurant is methodical”, Garrus adds. Shepard answers with a nod. “It's hard to believe people like that would overlook a security camera and randomly shoot a woman through the shoulder. If they wanted to kill...”

“… they would have.”

Tali'Zorah takes a few breaths, a few steps back and nearly stumbles, then sits down on the sofa. However clever she is, she hasn't expected this.

Shepard is at her side a moment later. “I know you didn't want this”, she says calmly. “But what you brought us here is severe. Garrus and I are private investigators. In most cases, we aren't allowed to investigate crimes unless we get authorisation first, and this definitely is one of these cases. We need to get this to C-Sec.”

“No!”, Tali'Zorah says, but her voice has lost a bit of her initial fervour.

“Got to agree with her, Shepard”, Garrus says. He's had enough of bureaucracy and red tape for a lifetime, and this situation is too urgent to waste time trying to find someone at C-Sec listening to them. It's already been two days since the raid, any more time and the leads might get cold. And, when he is honest with himself, he doesn't like the thought of not investigating this on his own.

“Garrus, we don't have the authority”, Shepard replies. She's still calm, but he sighs again, louder this time. She's sometimes frustrating him. But then, however, she smirks a bit. “But I know just who to go to. There's a sergeant who owes me a favour.”


	7. Once Upon a Time on the Citadel - Shepard Magic (Garrus)

He waits for Shepard in his car outside a C-Sec station somewhere in the Zakera Wards, he doesn't really need to see it from the inside right now. She's said it wouldn't take long; he's taken out his tablet and does some research while she's gone, his mind never straying far away from that SD card and the video.

It's the next morning, and Garrus thinks they can be happy that Shepard finally convinced Tali'Zorah to go back home and rest. Of course only given the promise that they'd call if they'd need help. That girl is exasperating, but at least, she did as she was asked.

There is still something about the video that doesn't sit well with him, he blames it on his instincts as a former cop. Something about it is off, something else than he already knows, but he can't put his finger on it. And so he looks at the footage over and over again while he waits, as if the tenth time it would give him any new insight.

He's close to hitting the passenger's seat with his fists twice because that something in the back of his mind hasn't become any clearer.

When Shepard returns, it's only been fifteen minutes.

“Got it”, she says back in the car, and that smirk of hers looks like a cat's smug grin.

She waves a piece of paper in front of his face, he snatches it mid-air. What he reads is the first good – no great – news in a while.

“How'd you do that?”, he just says, grins a bit, his anger at the lack of new information on the video waning. It's an official authorisation for investigating the case, including the permission to use official C-Sec resources and data bases.

“Sgt. Armando Bailey, does that ring a bell?”

“The guy you helped bust a drug ring while I was finishing the exams for my license? That explains a lot.”

“Said he owes me one, and now's as good a time as any to collect that favour”, Shepard says with a big grin. “There you go, told you we could do it the right way.”

There's always such an insistence about her when she speaks about _the right way_ that he almost wants to roll his eyes at her. His father used to speak about that a lot, too; though with Shepard, it doesn't drive Garrus as crazy. Maybe because Shepard really means it, and there's something about her, a certain conviction, that is hard to ignore. It's probably contagious.

“Though it's getting even odder, you know”, Shepard continues, all serious again. “Bailey checked the crimes reported two days ago, the only robbery reported in a restaurant was on Silversun Strip, in a Sushi place. That's definitely not the one we're dealing with here.”

“It's odd, yes”, Garrus says thoughtfully. “But I can't say it surprises me. This whole case is somewhat fishy.”

“We need to figure out who that woman is, it's probably our only shot”, Shepard says with a careful nod. “Luckily, Bailey's already set someone on it. I'll get a call.”

“If she went to a hospital at all. They didn't go to C-Sec with the shooting, and a gunshot wound isn't inconspicuous.”

Shepard sighs and raises her brows. “Let's hope she has common sense.”

Garrus is honestly surprised that it doesn't take long until a young officer condemned to a desk job has checked the hospitals for a woman in her thirties with a gunshot through her shoulder who came in three days ago. The recreated time stamp apparently helped a lot here, and first checking the more likely quarters – the Lower Wards, parts of Zakera, the gambling district around Silversun Strip – further narrowed the search.

Half an hour later, they are driving towards a clinic on the Lower Wards where a woman meeting the parameters is taken care of. In the meantime, the C-Sec officer checks the remaining hospitals on the Citadel for them. Garrus doesn't envy them their job, desk jobs used to be his horror back in Cipritine.

Though adultery is quickly becoming his new favourite horror.

He can tell from the way Shepard frowns as they walk through the corridors of the hospital that she finds this all just about as contrived as he does. The feeling only grows worse when the woman in the hospital turns out to be exactly the one they're looking for.

This is all way too easy.

The waitress, a woman called Carora Weyrloc, is fully conscious when they arrive. The nurses allow Shepard and him to talk to her, under the condition that it doesn't take more than a few minutes.

Shepard goes in first, greets the woman in the hospital bed with a big smile and immediately sits down on a stool next to the bed, gets into a little chit-chat with the waitress about the flowers and get-well-cards on her night-stand. Garrus himself stays close to the door, does nothing at the moment but listen.

“I'm Jane Shepard, by the way”, Shepard says conversationally after she just complimented the colour of the roses in one of the smaller bouquets. “And that's my partner, Garrus Vakarian.”

Something about these words wipes the tiny, exhausted smile off of Carora Weyrloc's face.

“Are you C-Sec?”, she asks. She sounds wary.

“No, no”, Shepard immediately answers, hands raised defensively. “We're private investigators.” The difference doesn't seem to sooth Carora Weyrloc much. “Though we are here about the robbery. And about… well. Your injury.” Shepard accompanies her careful words by a gesture towards the waitress's bandaged shoulder. “We want to find out who did this to you.”

“Who hired you?”, Carora Weyrloc says, her voice has turned colder. Wary.

Not everything about this case is clear-cut fishy, it seems.

“We don't talk about our clients, though you probably don't know them, anyway”, Shepard says soothingly. “An unrelated party. They found an SD card with security camera footage of the restaurant and asked us to investigate. We have hoped you could tell us a bit about the circumstances.”

Carora Weyrloc scrutinises Shepard for a long moment before she answers. “They… they stormed my brother's restaurant”, she says then. “Made us give them all our earnings from that day. Then one of them… he just shot me! I didn't… I mean I---”

“It's okay, really”, Shepard intervenes as the waitress's breathing and heart rate accelerate. “You don't need to tell us everything that happened after that. When the robbers were gone, though… someone called an ambulance?”

“My brother, yes”, says Carora Weyrloc. The monitors show her vital signs going back to normal.

“Thank you, Ms. Weyrloc”, Shepard says calmly. “That already helps us. But there is one thing we've been wondering about: Why did nobody call C-Sec about this? Instead, the SD card with the footage shows up on a scrapyard?” Shepard really has perfected the art of keeping her voice free of all accusations and double meanings that make civilians unwilling to speak to police officers, which is rather impressive.

Garrus watches Carora Weyrloc attentively, but she doesn't flinch when hearing where exactly the SD card was found. But now, she averts Shepard's eyes and looks towards the window. “C-Sec never listens”, she says simply.

Garrus masks a sigh by clearing his throat. It seems to be a common argument around town, or he's just met two people of the same minority in not even 24 hours.

“But there is solid evidence”, Shepard continues. Carora Weyrloc tenses a bit, still avoids Shepard's eyes. “The security camera footage. Show that to any officer, and an investigation is guaranteed. You can still do that, by the way, and go to C-Sec with this.”

“No”, Carora Weyrloc says. She sounds a bit final and Garrus rolls his eyes.

Even Shepard sighs a tiny bit. “So instead, you put the evidence of the robbery on a SD card on a Quarian scrapyard, hoping it would be found and someone else goes to C-Sec for you?”

“I don't know what my family did with the footage after the ambulance arrived.”

It's a bit curious that Carora Weyrloc doesn't find it at least interesting that the camera apparently showed up on a scrapyard, though it might be coincidence.

But what about this case is coincidence anyway.

“Somebody visited you”, Shepard says, pointing at the flowers and get-well-cards on the night stand. Carora Weyrloc doesn't react, it's getting a bit frustrating. “They didn't speak about the robbery?”

“No.”

Garrus doesn't hide the sigh this time. “Shepard, this is---”

“I know”, Shepard interrupts him. She throws a look over her shoulder and signals with a nod that she agrees with him. “Ms. Weyrloc. Are you hiding something from us?”

Carora Weyrloc tenses once more, but still looks towards the window. “No. This is all I know.”

“Even if you don't know more, your family probably does. Somebody must have placed the SD card on that scrapyard, it sure didn't get there on its own”, Garrus says, finally entering the conversation. “We'll figure the address of the restaurant anyway, so it's better if you just give it to us. We'll talk to them.”

The waitress doesn't react. Shepard gets up from her stool, moves around the bed and squats down, forcing Carora Weyrloc to look at her, finally. “Look, I know this looks pretty dangerous, and that you've just been shot. I understand that this can be… traumatising. And the first time I was shot… I still remember it. But I've been a soldier, I've seen my fair share of shootings. I can only try to understand how it must feel for someone who hasn't chosen that life and still had to look into the barrel of a gun. But if you don't help us, your attackers will go free. We're not asking for much, just the name of the restaurant this all took place in. Just a name. We'll take it from there.”

“My brother Guld”, Carora Weyrloc says after a silence that Garrus only allowed to last that long because Shepard signalled him to. “ _The Golden Maw_ is his restaurant. It's down in the Lower Wards, near the Tonbay Quarters. Tell him I send you.”

Close to the Tonbay, that explains at least a few things.

He and Shepard exchange a glance, decide to leave. “Thank you, Ms. Weyrloc. We'll talk to your brother.”

They're hardly out of the room, as Carora Weyrloc calls once more. “Ms. Shepard?”

Shepard goes back in, Garrus stays at the door, full with anticipation. The monitors show an increased heart rate, something big is coming. He knows it. “Don't let them do it again”, Carora Weyrloc nearly whispers, her breath going shallow.

“Again?”, Shepard repeats. She's back at the hospital bed in a heartbeat, and Garrus closes the door behind himself. “You know who did this? And they did it before?”

The waitress nods a tiny bit, forces herself to breathe deeply. “Clan Urdnot.”

And somewhere in Garrus' mind, things fall into place. Urdnot. Weyrloc. _Clans_. He's an idiot for not realising this sooner. It's the way the thugs moved, he's seen it before. It's the way one of the thugs lunged forward, head first; it's the very room-filling, not very cost-efficient way they move.

“They're Krogan”, he mutters to Shepard on their way out of the hospital. Her eyes are narrowed as she's dialling Bailey, but stops briefly now to look at him. “Clan Weyrloc and Clan Urdnot. Should've realised it sooner, I've seen my fair share of clan fights in Cipritine. Their fighting style...”

“I know”, she gives back. He's hardly surprised she realised it sooner. “Had a few run-ins with Krogan mercs some years back. I thought about them when I saw the video, but I wasn't entirely sure. Now though...” She is cut short as the phone connects. “Bailey? This is Shepard, we've spoken to Carora Weyrloc, she's the woman on the video I've shown you… Yeah, clan Weyrloc. Garrus and I think they're Krogan. … We're going to speak to the brother now. … _The Golden Maw_ , it's in the Lower Wards. Close to the Tonbay. … Yeah, I'm waiting.”

Their first real case after Saren Arterius, and it's a really good one. He knows it's a bit indecent, but getting into something involving Krogan is just exciting. Especially since he's a Turian, and at least a little part of him still feels like one. And Palaven and Tuchanka don't exactly have the best of history with each other, multiple wars in the past and a shaky peace in the last decades.

Not to mention that a good portion of the Krogan not living in Tuchanka work as mercenaries, or form their own form of what other nations call _mafia_.

And if the Krogan mafia is involved, the contrived evidence suddenly seems a little less suspicious.

Shepard, however, has a decidedly displeased frown on her face as she hangs up. She stops again, looks at him dead serious as if everything has fallen into place in her mind, too. “Garrus, I'm pretty sure this is a trap. Someone must have staged it to frame clan Urdnot, because the thugs definitely weren't clan members. It's the only explanation.”

He eyes her closely, her face is set in stone. “We knew it's staged right from the start, and with the Krogan, you never know who's fighting whom. How can you be so sure?”, he asks. He's learned to trust her on her hunches and theories; they're mostly right. That doesn't mean he always understands where she's coming from.

He has about a dozen ideas about why she believes this is a trap, and most of them do make logical sense. What she answers, however, decidedly hasn't been one of these theories: “I know clan Urdnot's leader personally.”


	8. Once Upon a Time on the Citadel - Playing with Fire (Tali)

She checks the little note in her hand for the third time. This is it – it must be – this is the right address. She looks up to a shopfront with dark curtains and the symbol of a giant snake-like creature edged onto the glass.

After meeting with the two PIs the day before, Tali has wanted to let it go, and let them do their work – or maybe, let Shepard do the work and acknowledge that this has to involve Vakarian by default, whether or not she likes him. But back at home, their conversation just hasn't left her mind. Maybe this is her very personal Rubik's cube, but in the evening, and during half of the night, she couldn't rest. Ran even more filters on the video, in hopes of getting more information out of it, something that would help this all make some logical sense. Why would someone film an incident like that one and hide the video in a digital camera?

After some time, and probably a hundred runs of the video, Tali finally found something worthwhile: A small, hardly identifiable logo on the bar panels, something like a giant snake. She searched the internet for similar symbols – and eventually found _The Golden Maw_ , a restaurant in the Lower Wards close to where Veetor usually meets Mouse, just during her last lecture for the day. The address landed on a piece of paper immediately, and she had to keep herself from going there in the middle of the lecture.

But now that she's just in front of the crime scene, she wants to know more. The streets around her aren't inviting; nothing compared to where auntie Raan lives, or even compared to the area where Shepard's office is. It's lonely here, even at lunchtime, there are a few restaurants around, a tattoo parlour, a laundry salon. But all in all, she doesn't really like to be here. She has her phone out in a heartbeat, wants to dial Shepard as a blue, mid-sized CUV rolls up and parks just on the opposite side of the street.

She hears a mildly familiar voice before she gets any other idea. “What are you doing here?!“, he says coldly, but less collected than the day before. It sends a surge of anger through her veins, but spares her the phone call.

“Tali?“, says Shepard as she gets out of the car, too. “How come you're here?“

“I've analysed the video some more and came across this symbol here“, Tali answers, points towards the snake etched onto the store front. “I was just about to call you.“

Garrus Vakarian throws her a sharp glance over the top of the car, Shepard looks at her with raised brows but waves her over.

“You shouldn't be here“, she says, sounds a bit like auntie Raan when she's disappointed.

“I needed to do something, and I needed to be sure that this is the right place. So I came here“, Tali explains and can't help feeling a little defiant – what she did was harmless, after all. She hears Vakarian let out a low, rather silent growl. She decidedly ignores it, lets her eyes move over to what the detectives are doing. It makes her heart skip a beat. “Shepard are those...!“

“Safety measures“, Shepard says shortly as she and Vakarian fix a small pouch each onto their belts. Her jacket is lifted up a little bit as she moves her arms, giving away a holster with a handgun being strapped to her shoulder. Then, as the pouch is fixed, Shepard takes a deep breath and looks her into the eyes. “Listen, Tali. This is bigger than what either of us has guessed, and we don't know if it's dangerous inside. Go back home, do us the favour. Don't meddle with this.“

There is something final about the way Shepard says this, something that doesn't allow for words on the contrary.

Back when Tali was much younger, and her father less busy, they used to shoot at empty cans together with water guns. She used to be very good at it.

But this is hardly the same, and there is something about Shepard and Vakarian, something more adamant and stony about the way they treat this then both appeared the day before. Whatever this is, if it involves the chance of a shooting, she'd better go home, no matter if it doesn't agree with her to leave the danger to the detectives. She's hired them for exactly that, she rationalises.

She's still a bit reluctant as she turns around, but Vakarian slams the trunk shut like he means business, and that probably is the final drop. “Yes you're… you're right, of course. Sorry. I'm going home.“

“Good“, says Shepard shortly, but she manages a little smile. “Don't worry, we're just being careful. I'll give you a call once this is over, okay?“

“Okay.“

Shepard cracks another smile, then, without so much as a word, she and Vakarian move over to the restaurant, their weapons hidden beyond jackets. Shepard appears casual, at the very least.

It doesn't seem like Tali can do much now, even if she has a bad feeling about this. If it involves a shooting, she won't be of much help. But if it involves a shooting, Shepard might be in danger; and it has been her job, her case, that got her there.

Of course this is not the way she should think, but keeping the thoughts at bay is difficult; they come creeping back like moths drawn to a fire.

She waits until Shepard and Vakarian are inside, looks a few seconds at the dark curtains. And only when nothing happens, she starts to be on her way. The restaurant is located at a crossing, and she needs to walk down the perpendicular street to get to the next bus stop. When she passes the restaurant, she makes a silent step after the other, slowly, to maybe hear what happens inside, but everything is dead silent.

It's a stupid feeling that nothing is in her control any more after she spend so much time on this video. It's a lost cause, but her curiosity and the feeling of being responsible for this make a last attempt to fight against her sensibility; she swallows all three with a deep breath.

She passes an entryway to a backyard, probably belonging to the same block as the restaurant. It's best if she distracts herself with a bit of music, takes her earphones out of her pockets.

She already listens to Nirvana when it happens, and curses herself for the idea with the music.

She has hardly left the entryway behind by ten metres as a pair of hands closes over her mouth, so firmly and quickly that she can't even scream, and someone much bigger and stronger than her begins to drag her away, back to the entryway, down the passage that leads to the backyard.

And no matter how much she struggles, her movements hectic and fuelled by a sudden rush of panic, she can't do anything against it.


	9. Once Upon a Time on the Citadel - From Tuchanka with Love (Garrus)

After Tali'Zorah has turned up at _The Golden Maw_ , Garrus has made up his mind. She's annoying. Certainly courageous and pretty clever, but annoying.

At least, Shepard's magic tricks have worked again. It's not that they expect a shooting per se, but with Krogan, and a possible trap, it's nothing to discard entirely.

Shepard's revelations about Urdnot Wrex, clan Urdnot's leader and apparently an old military contact, have put a different light on the situation. They've talked about it on the way here, think both that probably everything is a set-up to disgrace a rivalling clan – which in itself is a novelty. Garrus has never heard of any Krogan trying something like politics and manipulation instead of a clean-cut fistfight including the obligatory headbutt. But probably, centuries of infighting make you creative.

He's missed this; the anticipation, the feeling of a holster and a gun around his shoulders. It's not that he feels naked without a gun, or somehow 'incomplete'. Well, maybe a bit. But it's more a reminder, a glimpse back into the life he left behind – the best parts of it: doing something to fight crime. Not playing Battleship with cheating spouses and shoplifters using online research and Shepard's magic talking. That's work too, sure. But he sometimes wonders why a former cop misses the action, when a former soldier appears to be able to stand it perfectly. He remembers what he knows about Akuze at those times, and doesn't follow those thoughts further. He isn't the one to judge Shepard for her life choices; and he would be damned to regret his own. Generally, regret isn't his thing. There are exceptions, of course. But in general, he's of the firm opinion that the past is done.

“No shooting if we can avoid it”, says Shepard as they stand in front of the door. She uses a tone he knows very well, the tone of a commanding officer.

He still responds to it so quickly that it could as well be a reflex. “Understood.”

They exchange a last glance, Shepard nods. The door isn't locked though there are thick curtains in front of the windows that aren't just protection against the sun. It adds even more to the suspicion that this is all a set-up.

He feels the weight of the gun around his shoulder, feels it press against the side of his ribcage. They said no shooting, but if push comes to shove, he's ready. He's not a particularly fast shot and handguns aren't his preferred method of operation – he's taken over a fondness for sniper rifles from his time in SWAT. But what he's also taken with him is precision.

The door swings open, Shepard tenses as she takes a carefully planned step into the restaurant. “Hello?”, she calls immediately, even before she's fully entered the room. “Excuse me, anyone there?”

He steps inside after her. There is no response from anyone inside, the chairs are turned onto the tables, the damages done to the bar, to the walls and to everything easily breakable have not been taken care of yet. There is only one working ceiling lamp, it's directly above the counter. Otherwise it's dark except from a small cone of light from where he's stopped the door from falling shut.

“Why do I feel like we've been expected”, he mutters to Shepard, his right hand slowly moving up. The room seems deserted, though the door wasn't locked; it's a bit unnerving.

He scans everything, searches for any hint why this should or shouldn't feel like a bad horror movie.

Shepard does the same. “Hello? Weyrloc Guld? Your sister Carora sends us, we're detectives investigating the incident that happened here a few days ago.”

At first, nothing moves. This is definitely becoming its own category of crazy. Shepard makes a few steps, but then, finally, the remaining (working) lights are turned on, and a man in an awful brown corduroy suit and a white, half-unbuttoned shirt comes out of what Garrus thinks is the kitchen, flanked left and right by two big men who look like they're trying to dress normally but forgot to take off the military boots and the dog tags.

The man in the corduroy suit also wears a horribly fake smile.

“Ms. Shepard and Mr. Vakarian, so good of you to stop by”, he says in an oily voice.

As if Garrus would've needed additional confirmation that this is a trap; after Shepard's explanations about clan Urdnot he already suspected that Carora Weyrloc might have had a little chat with her brother following their leave. He looks over to Shepard, but she fidgets with something in her pocket and doesn't draw her weapon, so he tries to make do with raising his right hand to the height of his chest.

“Weyrloc Guld?”, Shepard says, every pretence of pleasantry has fallen from her voice. She's back to being a commander. “We're here to talk.”

There's a vague sound like a phone connecting from Shepard's direction, and Garrus figures she's probably taken measures. It's buying time, then.

“Are you?”, the man in the corduroy suit, presumable Weyrloc Guld, replies. “I'm not so sure of that. And not sure I like talking.”

Garrus has his gun out in the blink of an eye; Shepard hers, too. He's seen the metallic glint of a barrel appearing behind the counters, just as the two bodyguards revealed big hands with knuckledusters.

“Nice that the hide-and-seek is finally over”, Shepard says coldly. “Mind explaining what this is all about before we end this?”

Slowly, almost as if he revels in the feeling, Weyrloc Guld draws a gun from a holster below his jacket, too. He still wears this horribly fake smile, but something like satisfaction mixes into it now. Smug satisfaction.

“You weren't supposed to be here. But now that you are, hard time to tie up the loose ends”, he grumbles, points his gun at Shepard.

Garrus immediately trains his own gun at Weyrloc Guld. “Friendly warning: put that gun away, Weyrloc.”

“Friendly warning? From a _Turian_?”, Weyrloc Guld spits. “Excuse me if I'm not buying that. It's all the same with your lot.”

There's a surge of anger in his veins, he tightens the grip around his gun. He doesn't doubt that he and Shepard would come out of here alive, though. They both stood much worse situations, alone. That doesn't change that the Krogan starts grating on him.

“And _your lot_ isn't usually the type for traps and political shenanigans”, Garrus says, eyes locked on Weyrloc Guld. “Yet here we are: I haven't shot yet, and you try to discrediting another clan instead of simply killing them.”

The surge of anger appears in the Krogan's eyes now, too. One of his bodyguards nearly jumps into action.

“You have no idea, Turian. This is nothing you could comprehend.”

“Enlighten me.”

“None of your business”, Weyrloc Guld says. Garrus' finger on the trigger just waits for a signal from Shepard. “But I allow you to die knowing that because of your death, clan Weyrloc will rise again and spread far beyond the borders of Tuchanka!”

“Urdnot Wrex will not fall for this”, Shepard says. “Your plan, however clever you think it is, won't work.”

“Don't you dare compare me to that wimp Urdnot Wrex!”, Weyrloc Guld shouts. Whatever composure he tried to keep slowly melts, the gun in his hand shakes. “His tries to unite the Krogan, they only weaken us! Our purpose is war. Our purpose is conquest! We are Krogan, we are---”

The impending speech is interrupted as the door to the kitchen opens another time. Two additional goons push through it, the first one carrying an assault rifle.

Garrus' composure almost cracks for a split second when he sees that the second goon is pushing someone in front of him.

“Look here, boss. We found her sneaking around the block”, says the first goon.

It's her, college hoodie and wavy hair; held at arm's length by a hard grip on her shoulders.

The Krogan somehow got a hold of Tali'Zorah.


	10. Once Upon a Time on the Citadel - Krogan Standoff (Tali)

“Let my shoulder go, you big troll!”, she shouts at the man pushing her. Her hands are bound and her heart is racing.

They pulled her inside over the backyard, and given her attackers' builds, all her attempts at escaping them proved to be futile. She tries it again; tries to shake off the hand on her shoulder, to no effect.

“Let her go. Immediately”, says Shepard from across the room. Tali's eyes fly over to her; she's aiming with her handgun at the man holding Tali. Shepard doesn't look like the woman she met in the office yesterday; her face has turned stony and her voice cold and commanding. She exudes an air of confidence, almost like an aura, and for some reason, Tali finds it at least a little calming. Shepard is a soldier, or was a soldier. Tali picked her detective agency having that in mind.

Her captors, however, are not intimidated by Shepard's words. “Even more unexpected players”, says a man in a horrible brown suit who stands a few steps in front of the others. He has two bodyguards, too. “And civilian casualties are always such bad press.”

“There won't be a second warning”, says Vakarian. He is aiming directly at the man in the brown suit, glares at him intensely but moves so little that he could as well be a very tall statue.

“That _is_ your second warning, Turian”, growls the man in the brown suit. “All talk, no action. Typical.”

Vakarian looks as if he wants to react, his face twisting in anger. Shepard's eyes fly over to her.

The grip on her shoulder increases, grows nearly unbearable. Her throat feels dry from breathing too fast, and on a gesture from the man in the brown suit, something is pressed into her back. Something cold and vaguely round.

Her heart threatens to break her rip cage, she tries to shake of her captor once more, to no better results than before.

“This doesn't need to escalate”, Shepard says, almost orders.

“Oh no, it does. Because when it has, there will be no stopping us anymore!”

This time, there is no pause, no reply from anyone. Tali's heart skips a beat as the man in the brown suit makes another gesture and the thing in her back moves. There are multiple shots and Shepard needs to shout, “Tali! Kitchen!”, at her to make her realise that the man holding her went down, and so did one of the bodyguards.

Tables are turned and more shots are fired, but Tali doesn't fully realise it – it's like she's in a tunnel, her heart pounding against her ribs and her breathing becoming like a fish's desperate gapes for oxygen outside the water. She stumbles back into the kitchen as the second of her captors howls in pain, and she hears Shepard cry: “Don't kill Guld, we need him alive!”

She needs to inform C-Sec, but with her hands like this it's difficult to get into her pockets – and she can't leave Shepard and Vakarian alone in there, they're outnumbered. But before she can even find something like a knife to cut the rope around her wrists, something metallic crashing to the ground behind her alarms her. She turns around rashly, finding her second attacker in the door frame, holding a bleeding shoulder and half-crashed into a shelf with pots.

“Oh no, you won't escape”, he growls, almost looks like a predator. He's aiming a shotgun at her, holding it with only one hand.

She doesn't think about it. Next to her is the stove, she has a frying pan in her bound hands before she knows what's happening, and then, she just uses it. Hits him over the head as he makes a step to come closer, making him topple over into the shelf with the pots completely.

“Nice swing”, says a dark voice behind her. “Now get out of my way!”

She shoots around again. The door has been broken down, two men are marching into the kitchen now, both having shotguns readied.

The first man, the one who spoke, is younger, grins wildly at her but doesn't stop and marches on into the room with the shooting. The second is older, he's wearing a suit, too; and his grin shows several golden teeth. “Shepard in there?”, he rumbles in a low, husky voice.

Tali can only nod before he, too, leaves the kitchen.

There are a few more shots, a few more cries, but even before Tali can make it to the taproom herself on her slightly wobbly legs, everything is quiet.

When she's back in the door, Vakarian is kneeling behind a turned table, Shepard stands upright but has her gun down, and when she sees Tali, she rushes over to her. Everyone else is lying on the floor, everyone except the two other man and the man in the brown suit.

In fact, the older of the two man has grabbed the other man by the collar of his horrible suit while his younger companion stands a few metres away and looks rather bored. The ground is covered in blood, tables are upturned, there are holes in the walls – it's all so bizarre.

“If you think you can simply march into my territory and steal my weapons and tell your pathetic lies to make me look bad that's already stupid”, the older man growls. Tali looks to Shepard, but Shepard doesn't intervene. She rather checks up Tali briefly, flashing her a smile and helping her out of the rope around her wrists. “But if you think your tricks and deceive will do the Krogan any good, or make anyone believe you are a good leader, that's delusional.”

“Is playing politics with the other clan heads any better?”, hisses the man in the brown suit.

The reaction is so fast that Tali takes an involuntary step back – the older man jerks forward, fast and ferociously, and headbutts the man in the suit so heftily that he goes down. She could swear Shepard giggled at the sight.

“Sure as hell not playing politics, Weyrloc”, he grumbles.

And suddenly, everything is silent. Except for the sound of her blood in her ears and her breathing.

Not for long, though. “Heard you quit the Alliance, Shepard. Looks like you're already growing soft”, says the older man then.

Tali only half-trusts her ears as Shepard breaks into a barking laugh and then first hugs the older man, and then his younger companion.

“Wrex!”, she says. “Grunt!”

“Hehe, being around that Turian made you forget how to fight or what, Shepard?”, says the younger man. Grunt, that must be his name then? That's an odd name, even for Krogan standards.

“I pretend I didn't hear that”, says Vakarian. He gets up from his fortified position behind the table, looks first over to her before he goes to stand next to Shepard. “Time for introductions, Shepard?”

Shepard smirks a little before she answers. “Okay, here you go. Garrus - this is Urdnot Wrex and Urdnot Grunt, old military contacts. Wrex, Grunt – this is Garrus Vakarian, my partner. And... I guess you met Tali'Zorah vas Neema in the kitchens?”

Four pair of eyes are suddenly on her. “Uhm... hi?”

“Another partner of yours?”, says Urdnot Wrex.

“A client”, answers Vakarian pointedly. His eyes grow sharper as they linger on her longer than the eyes of the two Krogan.

“Hey it's not my fault they went after me”, she shoots back. “I was just on my way to the bus stop.”

“Tali found a video tape with a staged robbery on this … establishment, a few days ago. Tasked us with figuring out what happened.”

“Guld tried himself at deceive, that's what happened”, growls Urdnot Wrex and kicks the motionless body of the man in the suit. “Got a hold on a few of our weapons a week back, thought he could use them to make some unwanted noise.”

Shepard sighs deeply, massages her forehead. “A lot happened in the last few years, huh? You're uniting the clans?”

“All your bad influence, Shepard.”

It seems like a very odd way for a reunion, but that the danger is apparently over feels rather relaxing. Now that her mind starts working better again, she should probably leave. Go home. Forget about this.

Or, she could wait and talk to Shepard.

“I'd like to chat and catch up, Wrex”, says Shepard. “But I didn't know you were around. I called C-Sec shortly before the shooting started, Bailey should be here any time now.”

“You heard her, Grunt. Time for us to go.”

“Come visit us over at our new bar, Shepard”, Urdnot Grunt says. “It's way better than this one, and we have a sparring ring in the basement!”

“Bring your _partner_ if you must”, Wrex adds. “And the Quarian girl with the mean swing – Tali, right? We've got some catching up to do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This whole section was something that I added rather late in the writing process. I quickly grew very fond of it, though, because of Wrex and Grunt. Uncle Urdnot's back in town :D


	11. Intermezzo - Vodka and Ryncol (Tali)

When she thinks about it some more, maybe she _is_ really going crazy for even considering this.

It's only been two days since the shooting at _The Golden Maw_ , since she spend an entire afternoon at C-Sec talking to an officer named Bailey about what happened, always remembering Shepard's words: “Could you leave Wrex out of this, Tali? He's one of the good guys, that's a promise.”

Vakarian has been extremely displeased when Shepard asked him the same, but eventually complied. Shepard really has her way with people – because Tali complied, too. Even though she hardly knows neither Shepard, nor Vakarian, nor the two members of clan Urdnot. She has only Shepard's word on it, but for some strange reason, she believes her. Trusts her, even. Even though her life used to be peaceful until a few days back, unexciting.

But then, two days later, she stands in front of another Krogan bar, _Kal'Ros & Co._, following an invitation from Shepard, briefly doubts her own sanity but enters anyway.

She apparently arrives in the middle of a drinking game between Shepard and Urdnot Grunt, if the loud cheering of the numerous people around is any indicator. The contestants sit opposite of each other at a small table, multiple glasses already in front of them. Just as Tali enters, Shepard downs another shot and shakes her head.

The crowd cheers, Urdnot Grunt booms: “Don't tell me you're already getting tipsy, Shepard!” And as if to underline this, he quickly downs a shot, too. The number of glasses in front of both contestants is now equal, but Urdnot Grunt seems less affected than Shepard, hardly bats an eye.

He's a stocky man, build like a battering ram and probably about as pleasant to get into a physical conflict with. It's hard to guess how old he must be though, the way he acts around Shepard makes it seem they've known each other for longer. His face is unexpectedly rosy, though, and nearly a bit child-like, with bright blue eyes that are both somewhat cold and life-hungry.

“I'm not getting tipsy on that stuff, Grunt”, Shepard replies, and in her voice lies a challenge.

The crowd hoots, and Grunt cries: “Hear, hear! Get us the strong stuff, old man!”

There is even louder cheering from the crowd. Tali figures nobody has taken notice of her, and so she goes to sit at the bar, next to the only other person in the room she knows, even if that person is Vakarian.

He watches the ongoing between Shepard and Grunt with mild interest that's limited to a raised eyebrow, leans onto the bar. He sticks out like a sore thumb; tall and lean, clad in jeans and a button-up in between lots of other, heavier men mostly wearing in gym clothes. He's also the only one not participating in the cheering.

“Ms. Zorah”, he acknowledges her, gives a quick nod and looks over to her. “Looks like I'm not the only non-Krogan around any longer.”

“There's Shepard”, she just says. He can't even give her a minute without getting back to the topic of nationalities, it seems.

“I've been watching her and Grunt for an hour, I'm starting to consider she might be a Krogan and just didn't tell me”, Vakarian says snidely.

When Tali looks over to Shepard and Grunt downing shots of an oddly greenish looking liquid, she's inclined to agree. “Kee'lah, that stuff looks... toxic.”

“It's Ryncol”, Vakarian says. “vodka isn't enough any more, apparently. Heard of it?”

“Rumours only”, Tali says. “One of my grandfather's cousins tried it once and it apparently made him go blind.”

Vakarian snorts lightly. “Well, I'm drinking to that not going to happen to Shepard. You game?”

A minute later, the bartender hands them two shots – ordinary vodka, she doesn't want to experiment with that greenish poison just yet, and apparently, neither does Vakarian.

And if he's the only one available right now, she might as well ask him. “I'm late, it seems. Did I miss anything?”

“Lots and lots of introductions, Krogan style”, Vakarian answers. A few metres away at the table, Shepard lets out a disgusted sounding growl after another round of Ryncol. “Meaning rather loud ones, involving quite a bit of alcohol. And a few explanations from Wrex, of course; but before any big revelations, Grunt instigated that drinking game.”

Tali briefly searches the crowd for Urdnot Wrex, finds him at the other end of the room talking animatedly (that is to say somewhat physically) with another man. There are, come to think of it, remarkably few women around.

“That's Wreav, Wrex' brother. Or half-brother, as I've learned”, says Vakarian as he follows her eyes. “He's something else.”

And indeed, Urdnot Wreav has quite a few scars all over his face and exposed, tattooed arms. Wrex himself has a visible scar, too; something that looks like a claw mark on the right side of his face. He's wearing a very nice and well-tailored suit, complete with a waistcoat and a necktie, and he's definitely amongst the oldest people in the room. Despite his age though, his hair is still dark auburn, thick and shiny like the rings on his hands (that – she isn't deluding herself there – probably double as knuckledusters if push comes to shove). Together with his well-groomed beard, he almost looks like a respectable business-man. Almost. He's nearly as tall as Vakarian but about three times as wide; so he's more a business-man who could probably crush at least half of the younger men in the room.

“So what were those explanations about?”, she asks as Urdnot Wrex headbutts his brother, which – thanks to the drinking game – not many people registered.

“Clan politics mostly. Looks like Wrex is trying to unite the Krogan without everyone killing each other”, Vakarian says. There is some suppressed sarcasm in his voice, disbelief. Doubts. ”Not everyone thinks that's such a great idea, apparently.”

On the other side of the room, Urdnot Wreav unceremoniously lands on the ground as his brother follows the headbutt with a fist to his face. Urdnot Wrex then decidedly ignores the scene, sets his necktie straight and steps over his brother, leaves towards the bar.

Vakarian doesn't even bat an eye at it; nobody in room does.

It's really, really odd and admittedly just a little disconcerting. Tali's never gotten into contact with Krogan before, but the longer she is in this restaurant or bar of sorts, the more she begins to think that they're all _something else_ , as Vakarian puts it. And she asks herself once more why she even came here.

“Ah, the Quarian with the mean swing“, greets Urdnot Wrex when he reaches the bar. He grins broadly, showing off a few golden teeth. From what she sees, he has at least three of those. “Tali'Zorah, am I right?“

For a second, she's too dumbfounded by the whole craziness of everything around her to answer, but shakes it off quickly. “Yes, I'm Tali'Zorah vas Neema, uhm… my pleasure.“

She reaches out for a handshake and receives a strong clap on her back instead, and a low amused grumble from Urdnot Wrex. “Shepard's friends are my friends.“ If she isn't mistaken, he throws a slightly stony glare to Vakarian's side as he says this.

It doesn't slip the detective's attention, either. “Same here“, he says, rather coldly.

It's an understatement to say that Turians and Krogans don't like each other. Centuries of war have left more than a few animosities on both sides, and the current peace between the countries is… shaky, at best.

However, Vakarian and Urdnot Wrex both don't follow up on this. Instead, the Krogan turns his attention back to Tali. “Good thing you came“, he says with another grin. He reaches over the bar, takes a bottle of vodka and two glasses, fills them and hands one to Tali. “Sorry about what happened at _The Golden Maw_. Guld trying to mess with me is annoying enough, but involving other people in our business is really low, even for him. Sorry you ended up on the front lines.“

He doesn't seem like the type to apologise easily, and Tali can't say that she doesn't appreciate it, at least a little.

“Well, I... made it out alive”, Tali replies, tries a little smile. “And it seems that the right people got caught, so... I guess I'm fine.”

As she doesn't comment on this further but rather downs her shot, Urdnot Wrex' slightly expectant expression changes into a smirk. “That's the spirit”, he says, fills her glass a second time. “No crying over spilled milk. Good thing you don't take it too hard.”

“Well... I... did come to _The Golden Maw_ on my own, so...”, she says. From behind Urdnot Wrex' back, she hears Vakarian snort mildly. Acid bubbles up in her stomach, and she has a remark ready at the tip of her tongue, but leaves it be. “If you don't mind Mr. … Urdnot ---”

“Wrex, just Wrex.”

“... Wrex. I do have a few questions. Some things don't add up to me.”

“Yeah that whole situation has a few holes”, Wrex drawls, turns around on a barstool and leans onto the counter. “So shoot – it's the least I owe you, I guess.”

“I understand that this man... Weyrloc Guld? tried to stage a crime and frame it on your clan using stolen weapons”, she starts, looks up to find Wrex nod slowly. “He recorded the robbery of his own restaurant, expected people to investigate – but why would he place the evidence in the...”, her thoughts immediately shoot back to Veetor; she has made it so far, she can keep the lie up a bit longer. Just a bit longer, Vakarian is surely listening. “.. on a Quarian scrapyard? And – if you allow the question – how did you even learn of it? Did Shepard call you?”

“Two questions, one answer”, says Wrex, takes another shot of vodka and fills her glass, too. She musters him carefully, but he doesn't seem to have registered her slip of tongue. Slowly, the alcohol reaches her head, but she needs to be clear to understand this, so she doesn't drink this one just yet. “Guld is an idiot, but not stupid enough to rely on luck alone. He planted the evidence at multiple locations. I got hold of the video after it appeared in the mail of a clan head who recently swore an oath to me. Grunt did a bit of research in the Wards, seems like a few more copies turned up there, too.”

So there were more copies down in the Wards, and probably Veetor was just at the wrong place at the wrong time, she has to tell him this as soon as possible.

“I'd make an educated guess that none of the addresses where the video turned up belongs to someone likely to go to C-Sec with it, am I right?”, Vakarian suddenly says.

Tali looks over to him, his shrewd eyes rest on Urdnot Wrex. “Of course not”, grumbles the Krogan. “The copies were for Krogan hands only.”

“Ruthless”, says Vakarian. A little grin moves over his face, as if he's appreciating the plan. “First discrediting clan Urdnot by imitating your fighting style, then waiting patiently until some other clan gets mad, and that all with stolen weapons up their sleeve. Dangerously overconfident, too, when I think about it.”

“Shepard told you that about the fighting style?”, Wrex asks sharply.

“Of course. She said she got suspicious as soon as Ms. Zorah showed the video to us.”

“Let me get this straight”, says Tali, following all the threads in her head and connecting the points. “Some other clan was to find the video, act on it and assume it was Wrex' clan robbing the restaurant, but not go to C-Sec? But how... why did they kidnap me then, they seemed prepared for you, didn't they?”

“Carora Weyrloc”, Vakarian says simply. “The waitress who was shot. She was in on the plan, of course. I think when Shepard and I left her, she immediately called her brother and they just rolled with it. Shepard and I were loose ends that needed to be... removed, same with you, I think.”

“... and they had the stolen weapons and ...”, continues Tali. Suddenly, she is really glad that she contacted Shepard before. “I don't know what auntie Raan would do if...”

“... exactly. If framed correctly, that could mean even more trouble for clan Urdnot. Otherwise, they'd at least get rid of us.”

Wrex lets out a dangerous growl at this, cracks his knuckles. “That's what I figured, too. Dirty”

“I'd want compensation, though”, Vakarian says. “I'm not a Quarian, of course. But I'd want satisfaction if my daughter, sister, or friend would have gotten killed by a Krogan warlord and I'd have gotten wind of it. I'd want revenge. I'd want justice.”

“And the Quarians would, too”, Tali says in a breathy voice. “We don't take lightly to one of our own getting harmed.”

Over Wrex' shoulder, Vakarian nods heavily. “As I said. A war at all costs.”

“We have kept ourselves with this kind of fight for way too long”, Wrex says lowly. “High time things change around here.”

Tali downs the shot in her hand. She's thinking about the whole reasoning, and on a very odd level, everything seems to make sense – even thought that sense is frighteningly unhinged. At least, it probably wouldn't repeat itself.

Still she doesn't sleep very well that night, a part of her is appalled by what she's gotten herself into. But then again, she's talked to Shepard a little further into the evening, and another part of her, maybe the larger part, is intrigued by her world expanding in front of her eyes.


	12. Intermezzo - Tali (Garrus)

The whole incident with the Krogan and Tali'Zorah has definitely been a breath of fresh air in what he fears will return to investigations of cheating spouses and shoplifters soon.

Fortunately, though, Wrex seems interested in using his connections to a private investigator and actually tasks them with a few cases. Sure, he's a Krogan, too, and a tough nut to crack. But as far as Garrus is concerned, Wrex seems alright. Maybe he should feel bad about kind of befriending a Krogan, or at least being friendly with one and his clan. But once the first animosities have been put out of the way, he starts getting along with Wrex winning personality and crazy son Grunt. They probably think the same of being friendly with a Turian ex-cop, so at least it's fair in that regard.

The more time passes since they first met, however, the more Garrus understands that Tali'Zorah probably never wanted to be just a regular client. To call her nosy would be an understatement.

She and Shepard sort of became friends – it's probably impossible to not make friends with Shepard after ending up in a shooting together; he's been there, too. And since Tali'Zorah is just about the best hacker either of them has ever met, and even more technically inclined than your average Quarian, Shepard has asked Tali'Zorah for a new 'favour' every few days or so. And eager to get into trouble as she is, Tali'Zorah has only been too happy to oblige every time Shepard made a request.

He can try his damnest to tell Shepard that they could simply hire Tali'Zorah to make it official (sarcastically, of course) or that she keeps on involving civilians into their cases, but of course, nobody listens to him.

Because it's only harmless research and a few modded drones and cameras.

And maybe it is, sure. And maybe Shepard just really likes that Quarian girl and they make good friends. And sure, she is useful.

But somehow, he's not fully certain that involving Tali as much as they tend to do now isn't bound to lead to a catastrophe.


	13. Black and White - Starter (Tali)

A few weeks after the incident at _The Golden Maw_ , things become more and more some new form of normal.

Somewhere far in the back of her mind, Tali registers that the turns her life have taken are unusual, crazy even, and definitely nothing she would have expected. And still, the excitement that has entered her life following her first meeting with Shepard is not unwelcome.

The craziest thing probably is that on that evening at _Kal'Ros &Co_, after the drinking game ended in a victory for Urdnot Grunt, the young Krogan was still able to speak clearly, have a conversation with her and offer her to train her with using a shotgun. Just in case she doesn't have a frying pan around next time when Shepard gets her into danger, because apparently, that happens often. On a second thought, it's far crazier that Tali took the offer.

She's seen Wrex and Grunt just about every week since then, on their own shooting range, and learned quite a bit about the Krogan – and about how to handle a shotgun. Shepard and Vakarian have been there at times, as well. It turned out that Shepard prefers shotguns, too. On the one evening they all practised, Vakarian was the only one without a shotgun; he instead used a sniper rifle with unmasked enthusiasm very much alike to that of Wrex himself.

It's not the same like shooting at water bottles, but Tali sees it as a sport at the moment and as a kind-of 'get together' with Wrex and Grunt. She most likely wouldn't want a weapon for herself (it's quite alarming in a way to hear Wrex and Vakarian fondly talk shop about military grade weapons and modding, only for Shepard and Grunt to join from time to time and request 'more boom'). But being able – or at least, learning to be able – to use a weapon isn't bad. She hasn't forgotten the feeling of being dragged away by a man twice her size, and the feeling of having to suppress panic to get a hold on the situation and herself out of it. She hasn't forgotten the bodies on the floor in _The Golden Maw_ , even if none of them were actually killed. It's a good thing Grunt also knows a thing or two about physical combat and self-defence. It doesn't hurt to know.

On the other hand, Shepard has been extremely enthusiastic about Tali's skills as an engineer and hacker. It all started with a simple encryption on a dataset that Vakarian wasn't able to crack by legal means, but both needed for an investigation for Wrex. Shepard asked Tali for help, Tali delivered, and a week later, Shepard had something else for her.

This has kind of become another routine, has carried on for a few weeks now.

Shepard has come to her with a webcam today, mounted onto a remote control car.

“We don't need it to fly”, she explains as Tali already observes the self-made control unit of the device. “Otherwise we'd have gotten a drone. But we need ground surveillance.”

“Well... the controlling seems solid”, Tali says. “Where's the problem, exactly?”

As much as it irks her, Vakarian isn't bad at these kind of things. He isn't an engineer, but he's good enough to solder some circuits and build simple mechanisms like this one. On the other hand, though, _he_ hasn't come to her with the problem. Shepard has.

He's probably too arrogant to admit that he's at a loss here, with whatever Shepard has planned.

“I want it to do some automated driving”, Shepard explains. “Like this cleaning robots, or the automatic lawn mowers. There's going to be obstacles and that little baby over there better not get broken.”

“Do you really need that? If you have a clear signal from the webcam, you can just stop the car when you see an obstacle”, she asks, just to make sure. She tests the transmitter, it's working. “I fear the trick with the automated stopping would require additional sensors. Or you get one of those cleaning robots and upgrade it.”

Shepard chuckles at that. “Observing an old factory compound with a vacuum cleaner, that'd be something”, she says. “So there's no upgrading this little baby here?”

“Unless you get me sensors, no”, Tali gives back.

Shepard only shrugs a little and sighs. “Garrus said that, too.”

“He did?”

“Said that without sensors, there's nothing he could do to improve it as it is at the moment”, Shepard answers. “Wanted to put one over on him.”

She says it plainly, without maliciousness, and shrugs once more. It's a little bit entertaining how she and Vakarian treat each other, sometimes. As if they've known each other for half of their lives.

Tali thinks briefly about her answer, but then decides that there is something she can do to help. “I can amplify the transmitted signal, so that you can drive it further into the building without losing it. Same with the signal of the remote control. And I can encrypt the webcam's transmission against unwanted third parties”, she says. “If you want to, that third party can also be Vakarian.”

Shepard laughs heartily and gives Tali the thumbs up. “Hey, are we that obvious?”, she asks, laughs some more as Tali only nods. “Okay. Well, you don't need to fortify the camera against my actual work partner, no. But the other stuff sounds great!”

And as Shepard tells her a few stories from jobs and the military and makes them a coffee, Tali starts working on the control unit of the camera.

It won't be the last time she's going to help the detectives out, she's sure of that.


	14. Black and White - Salt in Your Wounds (Garrus)

When asked about stories from his time as a cop, Garrus isn't at a loss for words. Sure, there are things he can't tell, stories that are secret – especially from his time in Cipritine's SWAT unit. There is, of course, also the privacy of the involved parties, and he respects that. But as long as it's safe to tell, as long as it isn't classified, he sees no reason to be secretive about his former work. If someone asks, they get an answer, it's as simple as that. Since he doesn't like lying, the answer is mostly very honest - regardless of whether or not the asking party has been prepared for honesty. 

But there is this one story, this one mission, that he can't even speak about when he's directly asked. Not that anyone apart from a few old colleagues would ask, since the mission isn't even very widely known to have existed, anyway. It's the darkest spot in his past, the only chapter of which he still doesn't know whether or not he has fully grasped what happened back then.

It's the story of his greatest mistake, his greatest loss and failure, and the story how a young SWAT operative became a traffic cop.

By the time that Garrus left for the Citadel, this particular story had been past for more than a year and a half, and now it's nearly two years. There are still nights it keeps him restless, still scars that haven't healed. But time has done its part in mitigating the sharpness of the memories, has blunt the edges so that it doesn't sting that much. Shepard has been a great help, too, and at some point or another, Garrus realised that if things would continue the way they had started on the Citadel, he might just live to see the day in which it would start being… somewhat bearable. Never alright. Never good. Just bearable.

But then, of course, life does one of those tricks where it leaves him alone for some time, only to come back around the corner full force and remind him that it still is as changeable as ever.

It started out simple enough – Shepard's C-Sec contact Bailey tasked them with the surveillance of a shady area in Zakera, where first investigation indicated a bigger form of organised crime, maybe a form of identity forging and weapon smuggling. Apparently, Bailey's own unit was dangerously undermanned at that time, and since both Shepard and Garrus had some form of official training either with the military or the police, outsourcing this problem apparently seemed to make sense to him.

Shepard and Garrus then started to deal with the situation as any professional would – they checked the area, checked their resources, and decided that they'd need a surveillance drone. Then they naturally went to a toy store and bought a remote controlled car, and he spent an afternoon mounting a camera onto it and connecting the signal to his laptop.

Shepard then insisted that Tali could make the drone even better (which Garrus doubted – not because of Tali's abilities – but there is only so much one can do with a webcam on a car), left him to do some research on his own and came back three hours later with a drone with now increased range and encryption.

He's not unwilling to admit that those three hours were well spent, even if it just provided yet another opportunity for Shepard to involve Tali.

But now, they've ended up in a comfortable distance to the targeted area, close to the office section of an old, abandoned looking warehouse. They're both aware that their little surveillance vehicle is probably a little suspiciously looking (though Garrus insisted on new, black coating to at least cover the original flame design), but the area is too large for only two persons and the camera will at least give them a little head start where to enter and what to expect – given it's not instantly noticed.

They're both already armed, too; didn't even speak about it. A habit picked up in their previous jobs, most likely.

At first, nothing really sensational happens for the better part of an hour. They have to figure out a second entrance for their surveillance car as the first one leads them to a dead end, and Shepard needs to break the lock, too. It feels a bit like playing around with needless gadgetry to not simply go into the building by themselves, and Garrus makes a mental note that he and Shepard need to speak about this and get their arsenal of surveillance devices up to date if they want to get somewhere as detectives.

The second entryway, though – a door a little more to the side of the building – leads to a larger depot. It's old and clearly abandoned, mostly empty and rather easy to overlook on the computer screen. What's suspicious about it are the newer crates – wooden crates, of a particular shape and size, crudely hidden behind old oil barrels and shipping containers.

They both know very well what it looks like, let the car circle the room a last time to make sure they're alone and ready themselves to check out the situation on their own. But then, the camera takes a shot of one of the wooden crates in a surprisingly good light situation and the stakes seem suddenly much higher than a run-of-the-mill weapons operation.

Garrus nearly digs his fingernails into the steering wheel of his car when he sees the symbol on the crates – the symbol of the Blue Suns. An infamous mercenary group operating all over the continent, from Palaven to Thessia to the Citadel and Illium and back to even Tuchanka. And a group with which Garrus has more than a bit of history.

The last time he's seen that crest he only barely made it out alive of a burning building in Omega's worst quarter.

Shepard, of course, recognises the symbol, too; the Blue Suns aren't afraid to rent out their services to warlords, and Shepard has fought her fair share of those in her time in the Alliance Navy.

“We go in”, she says in a voice that doesn't allow for any word on the contrary. “Nobody said anything about Blue Suns and before I'm calling Bailey, I need confirmation.”

“But eventually, we're handing it over to C-Sec?”, he asks tersely, manoeuvres the surveillance car back to the exit and to their own car with all focus he can muster because his thoughts are racing. Shepard only looks over to him. “I mean, that is what you're planning, right?”

“You don't approve?” She has a sharp look to her eyes and her voice, no sign of her usual joviality. She knows him too well already.

“Not sure I do”, he just gives back, closes the laptop. “These are the Blue Suns, Shepard. Any chance to get them when they don't expect it without ordering a whole C-Sec commando and possibly alarming them is worth it, if you ask me.”

Shepard looks at him, eyes narrowing, but he doesn't blink. Neither does she. “Let's first see for ourselves what this is about”, she then says. “Maybe the warehouse is empty, anyway.”

And so they do, they get in; it feels like they've done this a million times already, even though they haven't. Shepard leads; when she turns right to check a corner, he checks their left. They move quickly, silently, the same way their car has taken before.

The room is closed off from the bigger part of the factory compound, probably the reason it's not heavily guarded from this side. Another reason is surely that the crates are empty. But the way they look, the packaging, it's rather obvious that they are, indeed, weapon crates.

“Handguns”, Shepard says as she looks through one of the crates while he has his own gun at the ready in case they're getting unwanted visitors. “Probably not military issue, but I'm not sure.”

“Surely there's no delivery note on them”, he gives back dryly.

“No, nothing the like. There's just this here”, she says, gestures to the lid of one of the crates. He has a last look around to check if they're alone, then looks down at the spot.

There's a word branded into the wood in all capital letters. “'FADE' – what the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“No idea”, Shepard admits. “Let's get into the offices and see---” She stops mid-sentence, raises a hand, takes her gun all in one motion. He's got his finger back at the trigger in an instant.

There are voices coming from the closed-off part of the compound, footsteps, too.

They only exchange a nod before they both hide behind a crate just as a gate opens.

“... says we should destroy them, clear the room and place a few cams here. Fade's ready to make this our new base and it's time we're getting settled the right way.”

So they are just gaining a foothold here, interesting. There are two men, both wearing the crest of the Blue Suns stamped onto their leather jackets. They close the gates behind them. Shepard nods over to a transporter parked at the warehouse's delivery entrance. Clear the room, they said.

The way he sees it, he and Shepard have no choice either way. There's no possibility to get out of the building without being seen empty as the room is, the distance to the door is too large. And hiding until the two men are gone is just letting an opportunity go to waste. They don't have to kill them; just capture them. Interrogate them, maybe. Hand them over to Bailey. Just do something.

“So he's serious about the Citadel?”, says the other man. As Shepard predicted, they're moving over to the transporter, which means they'd turn their backs on him and Shepard any moment now for a few seconds.

“Yeah, sounds like it. Knows C-Sec, he says; they're all idiots.”

Garrus readies his weapon, aims over the top of on of the smaller crates. Just at the guy's shoulder, for the moment.

Shepard puts a hand on his arm immediately, destroying his focus. Her eyes suffer no opposition as she firmly nods towards the offices. There's a familiar surge in his veins, sour and still sobering. Reluctantly, he follows her through the room, into the opposite direction of the transporter. Shepard jumps behind another crate, waits for him, then readies her own gun.

He hasn't even gotten down fully when two shots ring through the air – Shepard hit the two back tires of the transporter. Garrus allows himself a little smirk as he aims at one of the mercenaries who take out their own weapons, their eyes falling on Shepard's red hair behind the crate.

They don't have the chance to shoot, though – Shepard hits one of them into the shoulder, Garrus shoots the other into the knee.

“Gate”, Shepard orders. There are a few barrels and crates but a clear line of fire into the next room, good choice for a fortified position. Shepard hasn't been a commander for nothing.

“Understood.” He keeps his gun trained on the gates, they slide open in no time and he shoots the first guest right into the shoulder of her dominant hand. Behind him, Shepard has her phone in hand.

“Bailey, this is Shepard. There's Blue Suns in the compound, trying to establish themselves on the Citadel. We need backup.”

Garrus fires another shot, hits another mercenary in the shoulder, but it's not enough to knock him out and there are still more coming.

Of course there are, the Blue Suns have no problems with their numbers. It's like a disease, like a rash that never truly vanishes, not even after all they'd done to figure out their leader's hideout, not even after Garrus personally killed one of their higher ranking officers. He'd have to kill a lot more than just that one man.

A shot misses his own shoulder by a few centimetres. For a moment, he is back in that burning building in Omega as his own shots ring through the factory, as he runs through his magazine and reloads, his shots only alarming ever more mercenaries to his location. For a moment, he feels the blood running down the side of his head like on that day, tastes it in the corner of his mouth as his thoughts narrow into a tunnel with a single exit: getting out alive.

But then, a second shot is fired alongside his own and Shepard is next to him, shooting down another mercenary. There's no blood on his head, and he's on the Citadel, not on Omega.

It takes them a few minutes, but eventually, there are no Blue Suns coming through the gate any more. They took down six plus the two at the transporter, it's a bloody sight.

“You okay?”, Shepard says, her face is stony.

“Not a scratch”, he replies, as casual as possible.

“Okay then. Bailey's sending reinforcements, we're securing the area as best as we can.”

“No waiting?”, he says with the tiniest grin he has.

“No waiting. Now that we've knocked on the door, they'll be coming to get us, anyway.”

He can't say he isn't satisfied.

They make their way through the compound now fast and efficiently, not delaying with checking all the crates in the other areas. He's certain they aren't empty.

Halfway through the second room, a group of C-Sec officers lead by Bailey joins them, and after a short briefing and bulletproof vests for him and Shepard, the rest of the compound is a walk in the park.

After they crossed a third warehouse, they find another office that looks like it has been abandoned very recently. Bailey stations his forces around the room, he himself joins Shepard and Garrus in investigating it.

There're files all over the place, stacks of paper; somewhat organised, but definitely left in a hurry. The Blue Suns were just settling in, probably they disturbed something important and whoever used the office fled. It's rather sobering, if they'd just been faster, this wouldn't have happened.

“Look at this”, says Shepard after all three of them spent a few moments searching the office. She has a file in hand that looks as if several sheets have fallen out, some of them only partially.

Garrus notices the stamp on the cover right away. “'FADE', it's that word again. The two mercs at the transporter used it like a name, so...”

“One of their operatives?” Bailey enters the discussion. He grabs the files from Shepard, flies through them. He's a somewhat no-nonsense cop, but compared to a lot of other, mostly Turian, C-Sec officers Garrus knows, far less bureaucratic. The way he carries himself and his crew cut make it seem like he used to be military in the past, too; but Garrus can only speculate on that.

“The Blue Suns rarely use code names for their officers”, Garrus says. “Nicknames, yes. But I'm not sure 'Fade' qualifies as a nickname.”

“If it's a person at all”, says Shepard. She's looking through a file cabinet now.

“Looks like dossiers.” Bailey is looking through the files still, Garrus searches the desk. “Good job, Shepard”, he then says. “If my leads on the identity forger are correct, this could be a few of the new IDs my men need to look out for.”

“I'm not sure why the Blue Suns would need their own forger, though”, Garrus says. “So maybe they just work with that forger, and that Fade's not a merc himself.”

“You mean like a freelancer?”

“There're odd fields of work these days.” He's sifting through another pile of documents he's found on the desk now; they've been covered by a plan of the warehouse complex they're in. They, too, look like dossiers. Neatly structured, too; the information is collected like in a police record. Only the names and photographs are obviously missing. “Here, I think I've got a few more. Looks like the business is already...”

He's only barely reading the files, more giving them a quick check-up as his eyes land on a particular piece of paper.

_Height: 188cm_

_Weight: 78kg_

_Sex: M_

_Nationality: Turian_

It's a coincidence, of course. It has too be. There are thousands of Turian citizens with that data, surely. But he's read that combination so often now, has stared at that one particular file in the nights he can't sleep so much that the data is burned into his mind, it seems.

_Age: could get away with 40, make it 1976 to be sure_

_Marital Status: single_

_Could've worked for a private security firm in Cipritine, trained marksman. Get him to Illium, maybe. Big companies always need guards._

Too much of a coincidence, and still it's not... he doesn't notice that he's clinging to the paper wide-eyed, crumbling up parts of it and everything about Shepard and Bailey forgotten.

What makes it final is the last handwritten remark:

_Prioritised by orders of Vosque._

It's one of these times when the feeling in his gut becomes stronger and stronger until it's graspable, until he can't ignore it any more, until he _has_ to act. This time, more than ever; it's the lead he's been looking for for two years now.

It almost became bearable.

“Garrus? Garrus, hey!”, says Shepard, shakes him out of his thoughts. “You okay?”

“Of course”, he says tersely. “Business must be looking good already, I said. Sorry, I got a little distracted.” He hands the documents over to Bailey, makes it look casual.

Bailey seems to buy it, Shepard clearly doesn't.

They clear out the remaining buildings in relative silence, meet only little resistance. It all goes on autopilot for Garrus, the way back to the station, Bailey's questions for the report, the news that none of the mercs have been killed and two, lesser injured ones are being interrogated right now. Before they leave, Bailey tells them it isn't over and he's going to ask them again when leads turn up, and for once, Garrus agrees that it isn't over.

This can only ever be over in one way.

Back at home he excuses himself, walks straight into his room, takes out a box he's stored in his weapon locker.

There's an M-3 Predator inside, standard issue, no mods. The weapon of a Blue Suns soldier, just a regular merc that Garrus killed on his way out of the burning building in Cipritine; the weapon he used to kill their officer Tarak. Just a replacement for the weapons he'd already lost in that mission; his first Mantis, his Avenger. Just a regular pistol.

There are three shots in the magazine still, and seven names carved into the barrel: _Erash, Monteague, Mierin, Grundan Krul, Melenis, Vortash;_ the names of the comrades he couldn't save.

The people under his command, twenty-five year old SWAT operative Garrus Vakarian, fresh from training but the son of the Deputy Chief and the best shot in Cipritine. He had been stationed with his team on Omega, the Union's very own rat-hole of drugs, crime and mercenaries, for several months. A special assignment to get a drop on the leaders of the Blue Suns, Eclipse and the Blood Pack; the three major mercenary groups operating in the Union. The SWAT operation caused one hell of an uproar in Omega before the Blue Suns decided that they had enough, and everything went south.

The names on the barrel of the Predator are the people Garrus killed because he trusted the wrong man; the seventh name on the barrel that he burned off after he figured out that his second-in-command didn't die in the Blue Suns' ambush in the burning building in Omega. That the reason they all sans Garrus himself were trapped there was that his most trusted comrade turned out to be a traitor.

 _Lantar Sidonis, 188cm, 78kg; 39 years old, male. Excellent marksman, favoured heavy pistols_.

A betrayal that cost six SWAT officers their lives. And all Garrus could do was rush to their help after Sidonis lured him into a different district with faked leads on Darner Vosque, the Blue Suns' leader, to find the building burning and swarming with mercs. He stormed the building alone just to find his teams' corpses and leave a trail of dead Blue Suns behind him. In the end, there was only Tarak left, and Garrus killed him, too; just before he passed out and a back-up team from Palaven arrived to contain the situation.

After that, he only remembers waking up in a hospital back in Palaven with his whole body in bandages, followed by weeks spent in therapy because Pallin insisted that after what he had just gone through, he wasn't fit for duty.

Which, of course, had been nonsense.

Pallin also took him out of SWAT immediately, reassigned him to a desk job under his father's supervision. There used to be officers around the precinct, no around all of Cipritine, who found the story of his survival admirable, looked at him like a sort of tragic hero, especially the young cadets. All they knew about the whole issue was just the name of the failed operation, but they made it a sort of nickname for him that they used behind his back:

_Archangel._

It always had a nice ring to it, but it's a mark of shame more than a badge of honour to him. The Spirits know he isn't a saviour, he's failed the people under his command. And there is no way he can make it alright again now.

After he figured out that Sidonis still lived because they never recovered his body, Garrus never stopped looking for him, not really. He never forgot that his comrades died because he trusted the wrong man.

He has no doubts about it; that file in that factory, the information on it. It's Sidonis. The Blue Suns get him a new identity. He's still alive, still breathing, while the people who's names are carved into the barrel are not. It's unbearable, it burns him from the inside, spreads through his veins like a fire and doesn't go away when he grips the Predator more firmly.

There's a knock on the door when it's already pitch black outside and Garrus still sits on his bed. He doesn't have it in him right now to deal with Shepard, but she's going to figure it out, anyway, so he tells her to come in.

It only takes two looks – one at him, one at the pistol – and she sits down next to him.

“Want to talk about it?”

“Talked about it so much with that therapist but it didn't get me anywhere”, he replies. It's all that's needed, she's been there too after Akuze. She's told him about it, and he told her about this.

Shepard blows out some air through her nose, but it doesn't sound dismissive. “What happened in that warehouse? You were suddenly... pretty out of it.”

He considers not telling her. He's already once trusted the wrong man, but he can't not tell her. Not with Shepard. It's not easy to put into words, though. “I told you about Sidonis, didn't I?”, he says, though he knows the answer. Of course he has, it's a stupid phrase but he needs the start right now.

“You did”, Shepard confirms, voice neutral.

“Those files we've found... I'm sure one of the people that Fade forges an identity for is Sidonis.”

For something so big and so muddled it's out so easy, and Shepard doesn't make it hard on him.

“You sure?”

“Absolutely. I've read his file a million times, I know I'm not wrong.”

She scrutinises him, the weapon he turns in his hands. “I'm sorry”, she says then. “I'd hoped for you that the story is over.”

He skips this. “Are you going to tell Bailey?”

“You don't want me to”, she just says.

“No, I don't.”

There's a small silence, and though she's next to him, she feels kilometres away. Not even in the same room. 

“How do you think this is going to play out?”, she asks. Calmly, neutral. No accusation.

“We're going to find Fade, he's going to lead me to Sidonis”, Garrus replies. Also calm, the fire in his veins is quiet for the moment, replaced by bitter determination. “And then I'll do what I kept this gun for: empty the magazine into his head.”

Shepard doesn't even bat an eye at this, she really knows him too well. “You know you don't have to do this, Garrus. We're working with Bailey here, he's going to make sure Sidonis is caught and brought to justice.”

“Don't try to dissuade me”, he says sharply. “I know you don't like it, but it's _my_ unfinished business. I owe it to my squad, to their families.”

“Then why do you tell me that you intend to kill a man if you know I won't just stand by and say nothing?”, she says, gets up from the bed. Not angry, but final anyway. “I know this eats away at you, Garrus. I know it better than anyone. I understand that you want justice. But just ask yourself one question: Is it really justice you're seeking for the sake of the families of your fallen comrades, or are you trying to clean your own hands by killing the last loose end?”

To him, it's one and the same at the moment, no matter if Shepard agrees or not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been out of town on vacation last week, sorry for the late update!  
> This chapter starts one of the most difficult to write parts in this story, but also the one that was most rewarding afterwards. I hope you enjoy it :D


	15. Black and White - A Taste of Trust (Tali)

The next time Tali hears of the two detectives it has a novel reason: Shepard invites her to lunch in a cafeteria close to the University, together with another friend of hers, Liara T'Soni. Tali of course knows about Dr. T'Soni about as much as any student of the University does, but she's a friend of Shepard and that's good enough for her.

Her own friends Sam from the Communication Science Department and Gabby and Ken from Engineering sure find it a little strange that she skips on their usual lunch meeting for it, but it's probably not going to become a habit and even if it should, she could still introduce Shepard to them.

Liara T'Soni already waits at the cafeteria's entrance when Tali arrives, but there is no sign of Shepard yet. Admittedly, the reputation of Dr. T'Soni is rather impressive and even a bit intimidating – just nineteen years old, but already a doctorate in History, currently writing on a second dissertation in linguistics. Everyone at the University knows her name, but nobody really seems to know _her_. There's rumours she's a workaholic, and of course, there's the thing with her mother, Benezia, who used to work for the infamous Saren Arterius but fed information to Shepard and Vakarian, and died in the final confrontation between them, C-Sec and her employer. As far as rumours have it, Liara T'Soni is dealing well with the situation though, as well as it's probably possible; and still, Tali feels for her. She knows how it feels to lose a parent.

Liara T'Soni doesn't look very intimidating up close, either. She stands in front of the door, a bit to the side, very straight and hands clasped behind her back. She rocks a bit back and forth on her feet, and with her short ponytail and freckles, it's hard not to see her as just a girl waiting for a friend and someone she doesn't know.

Tali probably best takes the first step here, they can chat a little waiting for Shepard.

“Hi! You must be Liara, I'm---”

“Tali'Zorah vas Neema, it's a pleasure to meet you”, says Liara T'Soni quickly and has her hand outstretched for a handshake immediately. Then, as she sees Tali's a little baffled face, she retracts it just as quickly. “I'm sorry, that was... very hasty. I'm Liara T'Soni, and when Shepard told me you would be here as well, I looked you up on the webpage of Professor Adams, that's how I recognised you. I'm sorry if that seems inappropriate.”

Liara has a moderate pace in her speech, but she still seems hurried, and her eyes a little insecure under slightly raised brows.

“It's okay”, Tali replies reassuringly, smiles. “I wasn't sure what to say either; you know. Without a formal introduction by Shepard. She's late, by the way.”

“She is always late”, says Liara. She appears calmer now. “I think she cannot remember dates very well.”

“Ah, so that's why she always just assaults me at home without calling”, Tali says dryly, Liara chuckles.

“I know that feeling.”

“Oh, I think we missed out on the introduction: So, yes. I am Tali'Zorah vas Neema, but just call me Tali, okay?”

“A pleasure to meet you”, replies Liara, and takes Tali's outstretched hand.

Come to think of it, she's not that imposing.

After ten more minutes waiting outside the cafe, they both have enough and go inside. Liara sends a message to Shepard, Tali orders them something to drink.

“Has Shepard told you what this meeting should be about, by the way?”, asks Liara as she puts the phone back into her pockets. “I don't mean to appear rude, but there must be a reason that she wants to see us both, we haven't been introduced so far.”

“No idea”, Tali admits and shrugs mildly. Thinking of it, though, Liara is right. “I'd have guessed this would go about differently, too; but in the end, I thought that the reason might just be that she wants to meet us for lunch and doesn't have enough time to meet you and me on different days.”

“You might be right”, says Liara. The words don't reflect in her face though, she has put a hand on her chin and seems to think. “I am probably overthinking things. As far as I know, she and Garrus have become more busy following the appearance of Urdnot Wrex.”

It's a bit odd to hear Liara call Vakarian by his first name, mostly because she's only over heard Shepard do it.

“Yes, she told me about that, too. Seems like Wrex has a few jobs for a detective.”

“Have you actually met Urdnot Wrex?”, Liara asks. She still has her hand on her chin, but her eyes glow with a different form of expectation now – she's curious.

Tali thinks for a moment about whether or not it is wise to tell Liara that she actually sees Wrex and Grunt every week for shotgun training, but decides that not much can go wrong since Liara is a friend of Shepard's and explains about the story that started with the SD card.

“You meet them every week?”, Liara says when Tali's finished. Her voice is still calm, but also full of amazement.

“Ehm... yes. I do”, says Tali.

“Fascinating! I have heard so much about Urdnot Wrex from Shepard's army stories that I think I know him. But I haven't actually met him.”

“Ask Shepard to remedy that”, says Tali. Liara's head follows her gesture over to the entrance, where Shepard finally comes in.

Only half an hour later.

“Did I write 1pm?”

“You did.”

“Indeed.”

“Thought it was 2, sorry!”, Shepard says with a big grin, rubs the back of her head slightly and sits down. “I see you two are already getting along?”

“We have used the spare time to get to know each other, yes”, answers Liara. “Though I had hoped for a more formal introduction from your side.”

Shepard laughs again at this, and Tali wants to believe it's because she's in a good mood. But something about Shepard seems off; and Liara's brows also tighten when Shepard stops laughing.

“So girls – what're you having? I'm starving. And the drinks are on me, for letting you wait.”

Liara's words come back to Tali's mind, that there must be a reason for this meeting. But it doesn't seem right to talk about it just yet.

They talk about Liara's studies on the ancient Prothean language during the meal, and Shepard seems as lively as ever. But Tali can't help it, there are dark circles under her eyes and she deflects all questions about work. Maybe a case is keeping her awake at night, it's known to happen.

“And that new boss of yours, eh what's-his-name... Professor Ja---”

“Professor Javik”, Liara continues. The frown in her brows that hasn't left yet intensifies. “I don't think he and I see eye to eye yet, to be honest. He... does a lot of things differently than his predecessor.”

“Her boss changed a few weeks back”, Shepard explains to Tali now. “Old one retired, and the new one seems to be an ass.”

“That is very blunt”, mutters Liara. “I would not phrase it like that. He is simply... difficult.”

“I've heard rumours”, says Tali. “My friend Sam sometimes listens to lectures from the Language Department, not Prothean, though. I think she spoke about a new Professor a while ago.”

The topic changes to Tali's upcoming Master's thesis over dessert, mostly about why she works with Professor Adams in Engineering but writes her thesis with Professor Xen, a friend of her father's, in Computer Science.

“It's just a bit hard to decide, you know”, Tali ends her explanations. “I love both, Engineering and Computer Science. Maybe I'll find a way to combine that one day.”

“I know how that feels, I think”, says Liara. For the first time, a cautious smile moves over her face. “I'd like to be both, a historian and a linguist, too.”

There's a chuckle coming from Shepard, it sounds vaguely proud. She has her head propped up in one hand now and looks at them both with a little, but now definitely tired, smile.

On the other side of the table, Liara discreetly clears her throat. “Shepard... I'm sorry if I seem to overreact. But you look tired, are you feeling well?”

Something like a suppressed sigh twists Shepard's lips, but then she smiles again. “Sure, I'm fine. A little tired, yeah. Got a lot to do at the moment.”

“New cases? Or is Wrex still keeping you busy?”, says Tali. Now that Liara mentioned the elephant, they can as well try to talk about it in detail.

“Not Wrex, no. Do you remember Bailey, Tali?”

“The sergeant who helped you with my case?”

“Yeah, that sergeant. I called in a favour for your case back then, now he's asking us for one. It's... taking up a lot of time, that's all.”

Tali nearly believes it; there's no indicator that Shepard doesn't tell the truth. But that is only the case because her body language has now changed completely; her back has become straighter, her face more neutral, she's not smiling. She isn't as relaxed any more.

Tali and Liara exchange a glance, and Liara shakes her head a tiny bit.

“We were wondering why you asked us both to come here”, Tali then continues. “Considering we've never met before.”

“Good question!”, Shepard replies, suddenly brighter again. “I thought we could make this a tradition, a... girls' night, or something. Well, girls' midday, maybe. Girls' lunch, that sounds better. And I thought you two could get along, and – not to brag – but I was right, wasn't I?”

It's probably just as Tali thought before, before Liara's suspicion has leapt over to her, too. She is nearly ready to leave it at that and just go on with her lactose-free yoghurt with blueberries.

Liara, however, is less easy with letting Shepard off the hook, it seems.

“I had hoped you would invite Garrus along, too”, she says. She sounds a little sharper than before, inquisitive in a way. “I haven't seen him in a while.”

“Wouldn't qualify as a girls' lunch, then”, Shepard mutters. Tali thinks she's rolling her eyes ever so slightly. As Liara doesn't reply anything, Shepard adds: “He's busy, Liara. Pretty busy.”

“Busier than you, how is that possible?”

“That case we're working on? It needs his expertise more than mine”, Shepard replies. She is back to being neutral again.

“If it's something like that car again, I can help”, Tali offers.

“No, nothing technical”, Shepard says. “Look, I don't think we should talk about that case now. It's difficult, that's all.”

“Of course, I'm sorry”, says Liara. The inquisitive sharpness leaves her voice, but not her eyes. “But you know, I can only repeat what Tali said: If there's something I can help you with, you just have to say the word.”

“I know”, Shepard says. “And I'm grateful for that. You two are pretty awesome, you know? Help us for free and all.”

It's everything that they get out of her that day, but Tali is quite sure it's not everything there is.

 

Her suspicion is proven right two days later, when Shepard turns up in front of the University to pick her up with her black GMC van – of course without previous notice.

After a bit of confusion with Sam and Gabby, Tali lets Shepard drive her home. She looks even worse for wear; now definitely sleep-deprived.

When they arrive at Tali's aunt's flat, Shepard invites her for a walk in a nearby park.

“To make this short: I need your help”, she says when they have taken seat on a bench. “This is not how I envisioned this to play out, but I can't do it alone.”

“Alone?”, Tali asks sharply. “What about---”

“Listen, I know you don't particularly like Garrus, but what I'm going to ask you is going to be about something connected to him. If you're not okay with that, it's fine. Just tell me right away.”

There's no joviality in Shepard's voice, not a hint of a smile. She doesn't pretend any more to be fine, either.

Tali can hardly say no, her feelings for Vakarian aside. He's Shepard's friend, that's enough. It has to be. “No. It's alright. Go on.”

Shepard takes in a deep breath, leans back on the bench and crosses her arms. “You know he used to be a police officer, right? A special tactics operative, too?”

“Yes, I've... heard that.” She read it in his file, of course, but that's something she doesn't need to talk with Shepard about now.

“The case we're working on for Bailey? Someone from Garrus' past showed up. Someone who... well let's say it's someone who escaped him on a case back in his days at SWAT. Someone dangerous. And Garrus... he can't let it go. He's spending nights doing research, observes people on a whim, tries to catch shadows. He's looking even worse than I do, hasn't slept in a week, I guess.” She blows out air through her nose, like a sigh that wants to be a snort. “Honestly, he's driving me up the wall, but... I understand him. We've both been through a lot in our previous jobs and... sometimes the past comes back to haunt you.”

Shepard has never been that open with her and it's leaving a pleasant feeling in the midst of all the gloominess. Speaking about it with someone, or maybe even saying out loud and being sure someone listens is probably the only comfort Tali can offer, though, and so she decides to reply nothing for the moment.

“It's probably better if I don't tell you more, but... the thing is, we're looking for a suspect. Probably a witness, but they're laying pretty low at the moment. And we only know a codename. Bailey recently found out something that kept me thinking, and I've followed a few trails on my own, but... I'm at a loss right now. I don't want to tell Garrus, though, because he's already chasing ghosts.”

“So you want me to chase that particular ghost for you?”

There's a grave nod from Shepard. “Specifically, I need you to recreate a corrupted file for me. Maybe check a few credit cards and cameras. I just need confirmation on that one before I talk to Garrus about it.”

Tali doesn't know what it says about her and her relationship to Shepard that she agrees without a second thought.

It takes her a whole night together with Shepard in front of her computer to do as the detective asked, but they are successful – and when Shepard leaves in the morning, Tali looks at the encrypted files she skipped when she decided to go to Shepard and Vakarian with the SD card.

_We've both been through a lot_ , Shepard has said. Tali wonders if she thought of _Akuze_ , whatever it is.

But this is about Vakarian. And Tali would be damned if this wasn't about _Archangel_ , too.  
  



	16. Black and White - When Life Gives You Lemons (Garrus)

The days following their raid on the factory compound are the most frustrating he has ever experienced.

The factory compound is huge, and until the forensics are done with it, it already takes more than a day in which Garrus is condemned to reading old files from Cipritine that he's taken a copy of. It's technically illegal, but already after the whole Archangel fiasco was over and he still thought that he would be a cop forever, he knew he had to have all data available, at all time.

After that first day, and while still waiting for the fingerprint evaluations, he's at least able to read through the material from Fade's office.

If he's had to make a wild guess and listen to his gut, Fade is someone with a military or police background. It's just a hunch; it's the way they organise data, the way they put their arguments in the notes on the files, the way their argumentation is structured.

But the Citadel alone is huge and C-Sec must have several thousands of former employees. On a hint from Bailey Garrus checks an establishment called _Chora's Den_ in the Lower Wards, apparently a place where former cops like to drink their lives away.

He spends three nights around _Chora's Den_ , observes people, talks to the waitresses (and other... entertainers). He knows that it's a small trail, nearly not even there, nothing specific; but he can't let it go. He tries to sleep (mainly because of Shepard and her thoughtful glances at him), but it's even worse than usually when he can at least kill his restlessness by reading all sorts of articles at night.

His team is dead, Sidonis is not; and Fade might just be the final puzzle piece that leads him to justice. How can he sleep when he knows that the trail leading to the final link, as small as it already is, grows colder day by day? It twists his insides just imagining that right in these moments, when he sits on his bedside at night, the _Predator_ in his hands and trying to grasp at straws, right in those moments, Fade is alive and knows something he doesn't. Sidonis is alive and waits to vanish from his reach forever.

No, not with all of Shepard's worries, he can't let it go. He needs to follow everything he can get his hands on.

A few days into the investigation, C-Sec is finally done with the fingerprint analyses just to run into the next obstacle: the prints from Fade's office might only belong to three different people. But either they have no entry in any database C-Sec has access to, or – and that's what's worse – the entry is existent, but has been corrupted and appears empty. Of course, if they are an identity forger, Fade must be good at hacking.

Which means that after waiting for forensics, Garrus waits for C-Sec's middle class hackers now to decrypt the database entries or at least figure out who they initially belonged to. All the while he can do nothing but read files over and over again and become a new regular at _Chora's Den_ , which slowly evolves into the place on the Citadel he despises the most. If he's ever had any doubts about how many failed existences there are on the Citadel, he'd just have to pay _Chora's Den_ a visit. The worst might just have been General Oraka, a rather famous former Turian military figure, who spends his retirement drinking his life away because a consort rejected him.

He has enough of that after a day or two, tries hacking the databases himself. But he would be lying if he'd say that he's good at that; he isn't. And so, days go by, time passes, trails grow colder as he's once more tied and bound by red tape and the internal mechanisms in a police department.

He's never felt so close to something, and yet so powerless. It's the worst form of punishment he can think of.

But then, five days after the raid on the factory, there's a silver lining. It's not at all relieving, though, but it's a decent trail, at least.

It all starts with Shepard. She's wary of his behaviour, he knows that. He knows her too well to be fooled by her attempts of appearing casual. He isn't surprised – or maybe he is, a little bit.   
She's started to act oddly, as well; only came home last night when he was having some sort of breakfast, and left again not even an hour later. But he is definitely surprised when Shepard comes to his room the next night way past midnight, with a folder with printouts and an official expression on her face.   
“I know where he is“, she says solemnly. “Fade. And who he is, too.“

The revelation hits him so hard that: “How?”, is all he can ask as Shepard hands him the folder and he flies through the printouts.

He doesn't realise that Shepard doesn't answer at first, his eyes are glued to the material. The photos catch his interest first; security camera stills from _Chora's Den_ , of all places. One man can be seen in all of them, middle-aged, balding, face like a pug, just with fewer wrinkles. A list of credit card traffic follows, some parts highlighted, he takes note of some shady transfers to bank accounts somewhere in Europe. The last pages are an excerpt from a personal file. C-Sec.

“Jackson Harkin”, Garrus reads the name out loud. “Dishonourably discharged. Bribery, assaulting suspects, drugs and alcohol on duty... don't tell me _that's_ Fade.”

“The fingerprints match one of the sets they found in the office”, Shepard makes herself known again. She comes closer, leaves her position in his door frame and sits down next to him on the edge of his bed. “What you're holding there is one of the corrupted files.”

There's no way Shepard has done this on her own, she's getting better with computers, but if he couldn't get this material, if C-Sec's own hackers couldn't, she shouldn't be able to. He has a vague idea about the 'who got you that stuff' and just glares at Shepard.

There're more important things right now, though. “You sure about it?”, he asks sternly. “About this Harkin being Fade?”

“As sure as I can be”, Shepard replies. “It's the best shot we have.”

He nods slowly in agreement, goes back to the photographs. “These aren't new.”

“No, they've been taken about a fortnight ago. _Chora's Den_ keeps the footage for a while.”

There's no way she got this information without a very good hacker.

“I haven't seen that face there, either”, he says. “Makes sense, though. I wouldn't show myself so publicly if my secret hideout would have been raided by C-Sec a few days ago.”

“Probably not. But...” Her reluctant tone makes Garrus look over to her. She's fidgeting with something in her pocket. Her hesitation is gone in an instant, though. “Look at the credit card transfers. There's this one account that showed up a few days ago, there...”, she points at a transfer of a particularly large sum. “We've checked that account, too. It belongs to someone called _Fist_ , the owner of _Chora's Den_. Harkin must've paid for something, so I'm betting that---”

“Fist knows where to find Harkin”, he finishes her thoughts. He's up on his feet in an instant, grabs his jacket before Shepard can even raise her voice again.

“Don't bother with it”, she says when he is already half-dressed and ready to leave.

He looks at her face for what seems like the first time this evening. It's hard to read Shepard if she doesn't want to be read; her mouth is just a line then, her eyes perfectly unexcited. It's the same right now, and it's a little unsettling.

“Sorry?”

She takes a deep breath, closes her eyes for a split second. “Don't make me regret this, Garrus”, she says slowly, but doesn't wait for a reply. “I've already been to _Chora's Den_. I've... spoken... to Fist. The money transfer was for a secured hideout to lay low, and I've got the address.”

She takes a small piece of paper out of her pocket, he snatches it. It's an address in the warehouse district on Zakera.

“What about Bailey?”, he says, still staring at the paper.

“I haven't called him. Yet.”

His eyes dart towards hers, but if anything, she looks worried. He knows that expression too well by now to miss it.

“You know what I'll do next.”

“Yes. But I'm coming with you.”

There's no discussion about that with Shepard, it's in her voice, and still, he feels obliged to disagree.

“You're already in this too deep. The less you know, the less'll happen to you if this goes south.”

“Then this better not go south”, she says, very final this time. She gets up from his bed, leaves his room just to enter hers and comes back wearing her jacket. “And I'm sure it won't.”

He lets out a low sigh. She's sometimes unnerving him. He's thankful, of course he is, for her help; for her insistence to stay with him through this. But on the other hand, it makes him feel... very dark. There's something about the way she treats him; no accusations, no judging, that reminds him uncannily of the numerous times someone told him 'that they're sure he can do better'.

Because he can't. There is only one way out of this, and Shepard doesn't need to take it. And neither does anyone else.

She must have gotten those files from somewhere, and there's only one someone who is good enough for such research.

“What did you tell Tali?”, he says to her as they leave their flat. He tries to take a leaf out of her book and keep his voice steady, but it's hard now that his insides twist and boil with anticipation. But they already drag Tali into way too much.

“Just the necessary stuff”, Shepard answers, no hint that she's surprised at him knowing her sources. “That it's a personal case and that C-Sec is lost with it. That was all I _needed_ to say.”

He lets out a long sigh this time. “You know that she probably read both our files, do you?”, he says. For a second, Shepard seems surprised. “And when she's good enough to break the encryption on Harkin's file, she's good enough to break the encryption on my old SWAT files. And on your classified missions, too.”

Shepard breathes in deeply, massages her forehead, but keeps going. “She's going to deal with it responsibly”, she just says.

“She's a civilian, Shepard”, Garrus presses through a half-closed mouth, trying to suppress his anger. “You shouldn't have dragged her into this.”

Now, Shepard stops on the stairs behind him, and as soon as he notices it, he does, too. “What was I supposed to do instead?”, she says. He hears a trace of anger in her voice. “Watch you drive yourself mad while revelling in revenge plans? Every second you have your head in those files and haven't even slept in a week because you spent your nights in this rat hole, and frankly, I can't stand it any more.”

She takes a deep breath, wipes a few hair strands from her forehead. She's his best friend, and in his more self-reflective moments he knows how difficult to deal with he is right now and that she only wanted to help.

“I shouldn't have said this”, he says quietly. “That about Tali. I'm not ungrateful, it's just...”

“It's okay”, Shepard says, takes another step on the stairs. “I'm fixing things with Tali once we've fixed this other mess.”

 


	17. Black and White - Aftertaste (Tali)

“You're never good, Tali. But today you're shooting worse than a damn pyjak”, growls Grunt as her umpteenth shot today misses the target. Her usual rate after a few weeks is at about 30 percent, but today it must be lower than five. “That way, we're having that shoot-out with Shepard that she promised only after Wrex kicked the bucket, and that's not gonna happen soon.”

She sighs and briefly closes her eyes; Grunt is grinning very broadly and she has already witnessed more than once that he isn't very patient when he's in 'fight-mode'.

“Sorry, Grunt”, she says, shakes her head as if that would rid her of her headache. “I'm pretty tired. I had... a lot of homework.”

Well, not homework. More actual work. For Shepard. And after that, she spend an entire day decrypting and reading Vakarian's _Archangel_ files. Only in the evening she's realised that today is another day of target practise with Grunt, and hurried over to the Krogan quarter, maybe just to get rid of her confusing thoughts.

A part of her knows that her headache and tiredness is just the price she has to pay for prying into other people's business.

“University's whole lot of bullshit, if you ask me”, says Grunt loudly. “All that homework and assignments and whatnot; better learn something useful.”

As if to underline his words, he takes his own shotgun and hits the target dead-centre. And that's the guy who told her once that a shotgun isn't a precision-based weapon.

“I happen to like it”, Tali gives back, a little miffed. She fires another round, but her concentration is really bad today. A miss again. “Let's stop this for today. I'm not going to make any progress this way.”

Grunt, before he answers, growls and does something with his lips that looks remarkably like a little boy's pout. “Hey, you can't chicken out when things get a little rough”, he then says. He shoots again on his own range, hits again, and continues, “You need more grit, Tali.”

“Right about now, what I need is sleep”, she replies curtly. Her decision is fixed, she unloads the shotgun Grunt always lends her, secures it like Wrex showed her. Puts the safety glasses back into their pouch, too; all the while Grunt fires at least another five shots not really paying attention to her.

It's been a stupid idea to try to clear her mind with target practice. And it's her own fault that she's in this situation – because of course, she _had_ to read that stupid file. And now, what she's found out just won't leave her mind – she thought it would explain things. In the end, it only raised more questions.

And left her feeling somehow dirty and drained, as if she's betrayed the trust of someone she can't even stand, and who probably doesn't know what she knows. Nothing about this situation seems like it was meant to be that way when she first walked into that detective agency, she wasn't supposed to know this about either of them. But still she does; and with what she did for Shepard last night – encrypting these files, hacking a few bank accounts, getting security camera footage – Tali is sure that it helped Shepard find someone, and if her research isn't mistaken, there's only one person in Vakarian's life who seems important enough. And now, the fate of that someone isn't in her hands, she isn't even sure if Shepard would speak about any of this again, or if they would just pretend nothing has happened. If nothing would happen, which also seems rather unlikely.

It's all so confusing, to leave this information in someone else's hands and be unable to do anything about it any longer. And staying up for two days straight isn't doing her good, either, her head feels a little like a watermelon.

When she's packed all her things together and Grunt is still shooting, she asks herself if she should wait. But then again, he doesn't have anything to do with her situation, there's no need to be harsh with him.

But he surprises her – she waits at the door for him, prepared for it to take at least another then minutes, but he only empties his magazine, then starts to secure his weapon, too.

“Hope you at least drink better than a pyjak”, he says lowly, a grin tugging at his lips again. Good thing Grunt never takes things too hard.

“I don't know...”, she starts, but when his grin grows challenging, she relents. “Alright. One little shot of vodka won't hurt.”

Wrex is at the bar, too, when Grunt and Tali enter. He has a smartphone in hand and looks at the display, he doesn't like this kind of 'technical hocus-pocus', but had to acknowledge its usefulness a few years ago as Shepard told her.

“When I was young, these things used to have a rotary dial. Nowadays they don't even have a number pad”, he mutters. “Damn gimmick, that's what it is.”

Grunt snorts dismissively, doesn't even try to hide it. “When you were young, people still hunted dinosaurs.”

“And I fought them”, Wrex replies without looking up from his phone or even so much as a twitching in his eyebrows. “And I'm still here. Meaning: I won. That's more than you can say of yourself, boy.”

Despite her current mood, Tali can't help a chuckle.

It goes to be a rather pleasant evening after all. Grunt hands out glasses of vodka, Wrex tells a few stories from his time as a mercenary while Tali fixes a few things on his phone and installs the app he's been looking at earlier. The one or other member of clan Urdnot stops by, has a small chat with Wrex or Grunt and then leaves again.

After three shots and about an hours, Tali nevertheless decides it's time to go home.

“More homework?”, Grunt asks as she announces her decision.

“No, sleep”, Tali replies. “You remember: The reason I'm shooting 'like a pyjak' today. I'm tired.”

She nearly misses that Wrex sends a sharp look her way. He's looked oddly at her the whole evening, at least every once in a while when tiredness and the thoughts back to Vakarian's file have made her head drop into her hand.

“You okay, Tali?”, he says now, Tali's stomach instantly drops. There is a finality in his deep voice that reminds her a lot of Shepard, but it's far less pleasant.

“Yes”, she lies. She can't explain it anyway, so it's best she just leaves. “I'm just... really tired.”

She slowly feels like a broken record.

And Wrex makes no attempts to beat around the bush. “Something to do with Shepard?”

It nearly makes Tali's heart drop into her stomach, and she looks at both her friends with eyes torn open. “It's … it's just homework. University can be... a bit much at times, you know.”

Wrex chuckles mirthlessly. “If Shepard hasn't changed that much in the last years, she won't waste resources”, he says. He looks at her without a movement on his face. “If you're as good as Shepard says, and I bet my bar you are, chances are high Shepard will ask you for a favour one day. That's just how she rolls, nothing else.”

He doesn't say more, just lets those words stand in the room. Grunt is silent, looks expectant and a little as if he thinks it's thrilling. Tali doesn't know what to say, doesn't know how to react – Wrex hit nearly dead-centre, without even trying hard, it seems.

“So if she's going to ask you, one day – _by chance_ , of course – and you feel uncomfortable and need to get something off your chest”, he continues and gestures around him, then halts his hand on the stool Tali has just stood up from. “Just say the word. That's all I'm saying.”

It's tempting, so damn tempting.

And it's not as if she doesn't _want_ to speak about it. It's just – how should she tell auntie Raan about something like that without telling her that she did something very, very much illegal by decrypting several police records? How should she tell Gabby or Sam, who don't have anything to do with this life she slowly discovers?

The only one who would remotely understand is probably Liara T'Soni, but Tali doesn't know her very well. At least not yet. And this stuff... it's not something you just tell to anyone over lunch in a cafeteria.

But Wrex and Grunt... it's true, they won't judge her, probably. They ask Shepard and Vakarian to do all sorts of things that are sometimes... _questionably legal_ , as Vakarian puts it. And Wrex already offered an ear.

Maybe, if she starts out carefully... “Uhm... okay. You two... have been in the military, yes?”

“Nope”, says Grunt loudly, and so forcefully it startles Tali. “We've been freelancers.”

“Alright”, says Tali, swaying her head to get rid of doubts. “But you've... fought people. Together with... a group, maybe. Like a team.”

“A krantt”, Grunt replies. His demeanour becomes more solemn as he pours himself another vodka, but doesn't drink.

Wrex nods solemnly.

“What would you...”, Tali stammers. She can't ask this. It's what's bothering her more than everything else, but it's also way too direct. Wrex isn't an idiot, and she is still not sure if she can talk about all of this, or if she even should. Isn't she implicitly responsible for keeping these secrets now? “Imagine someone … killed … your comrades. Your krantt.”

Grunt slams his fist onto the table, the vodka partly slops out of the glass.

She needs to go on, at least a little bit.

“But you're... still alive. And you... you knew---”

“Has Shepard told you of _Akuze_?”, Wrex interferes. He stares at her intensely, not blinking, lips pressed into a firm line. He has his hands balled into fists in his lap, too; never have his rings looked more like knuckledusters than now.

“No!”, Tali says quickly. Wrex relaxes, a little bit. “I mean... I know that there is something in her past that... goes under that name. A mission. But that's all.”

After a few more seconds of staring at her, Wrex blows out air through his nose and looks over to Grunt, who quickly downs the vodka and sweeps the pool of liquid on the counter away with the hem of his shirt.

“This isn't about Shepard. Not really, at least.”

“But Shepard asked you to do something for her?”, Wrex asks sharply.

“Yes”, Tali admits. “She wanted me to decrypt a file for her, and track someone. I'm really good with computers, so I helped her. And then...”

“Yes?” The way he says this single word, it's clear that Wrex won't let her off the hook if she doesn't tell the whole story.

“I connected dots”, she says, and with the way Wrex stares at her, the next words are out quicker than she can stop herself. “Shepard said that the person I was tracking was somehow linked to someone from Garrus' past. And... I...”

Both Wrex and Grunt stare at her now. No, there was no easy way out of this.

She sighs, grabs the bottle of vodka and has another shot. The realisation of what she just said burns in her head, but so do all her questions, so do all the 'What if's?' in her mind.

What if Shepard and Vakarian find the one they're tracking?

What if Tali's right and it is indeed Lantar Sidonis, the man who betrayed Vakarian?

And what if...?

“Okay. So before I went to Shepard with that SD card, I checked her files, from the military. And Vakarian's, from the police in Cipritine. I didn't read anything that was highly encrypted. So I know that there is a file called _Akuze_ , but I didn't read it, it... it did not seem right.”

Wrex gives her a nod, but neither he nor Grunt looks like they think what she did was somehow unnatural, or would warrant her feeling as guilty as she does.

“But Vakarian has a file like that, too. Highly encrypted. He used to work for a SWAT unit, and there's one file from that time... and... when Shepard left me in the morning, I read that file. I just knew there was a connection to whatever Shepard and Vakarian are investigating now.”

And she's still certain that there is one indeed. And she still doesn't know what to make with the knowledge that that Turian bosh'tet lost his whole unit to a traitor, and that she knows about this even though she shouldn't, and that the next time she would see him, she would feel guilty because she does, and because she talks about it now. This was the sort of information people had to share willingly with other people for them to be allowed to know, but right now, she can't stop herself from confiding in the two Krogan.

“I think... Vakarian is chasing... someone from his past, and...” She feels like she needs another drink. “Whatever my information will do, it helped. And now all I can do is sit and wait, while I know something will happen.”

Silence moves through the room like a ghost. Tali's not making a lot of sense, she knows that, but it's hard to put everything into words. And she already feels like she betrayed Vakarian somehow, she doesn't want to say even more.

“If someone killed my krantt, I'd get that bastard's head”, Grunt suddenly says. It doesn't help that Tali's heart sinks from her stomach into a black hole. “Nobody messes with my people and lives. Though they deserved what they got if they let themselves be killed.”

_But I'd want satisfaction if my daughter, sister, or friend would have gotten killed by a Krogan warlord and I'd have gotten wind of it. I'd want revenge. I'd want justice._

Vakarian used to say those words so calm and emotionless, just a statement, not a threat. And Tali saw him aiming at the members of clan Weyrloc; unwavering and focussed.

What had she just done. And why had Shepard not told her the full truth, Tali would have never done this if she'd realised sooner that Vakarian would find this Harkin, and probably use him to find Lantar Sidonis, and then...

But Sidonis is a traitor, maybe he deserves to be … brought to justice.

It's probably not her place to decide that. If it's anyone's place, it's Vakarian's. It doesn't help the feeling that she's halfway in this, halfway out, and doesn't know what to do with it; or that she should have known this from the start.

Shepard said she'd only wanted to help Garrus. She wouldn't let this happen, she wouldn't let... But what if she would?

“Listen, Tali”, Wrex says suddenly, forcefully yanking her out of her thoughts. “I don't know Garrus very well, but Shepard's in this, too. If he works like I think he does, whatever happened in his past, he's not going to let it rest. But if Shepard likes him every bit as much as I think she does, she's not going to let that happen. I know what I'm talking about, believe me.”

He sounds very firm as he says this, but it doesn't do very much to calm her down.

Grunt drives her home that evening. She goes straight to bed but can't sleep, and after midnight, she has had enough of it.

Garrus Vakarian isn't the nicest guy out there, but he is far from stupid. He'll know who helped Shepard get that material, so there's no need for her to beat around the bush, either. And if he goes out to kill someone with material she got for him, she can very well let him know what she thinks of this all.

She finds her phone in her bag, finds the PIs business card and sends a text.

_Tali: Whatever you need this information for, Vakarian, you better not do anything stupid._

Because bosh'tet or not, she doesn't think that he's a murderer.


	18. Black and White - Bitterness (Garrus)

His phone rings even before they're in the car and confirms once more that it has been Tali who got Shepard the information.

“Congratulations, Shepard. I think she's angry”, he says and shows the message to Shepard.

“Damn it”, Shepard mutters. “I really need to talk to her.”

He just blows out air though his nose, types a quick message back.

_Garrus: I did not ask for this. You're name won't appear anywhere, though. You've got my word on it._

The answer doesn't take long.

_Tali: That's not what I meant and you know it._

When they are in the car though, drive towards the address of Harkin's hidey-hole, Tali'Zorah doesn't matter any more. Nothing really matters, not even anger, no anticipation. It's an odd state of mind, a quiet, calm focus; a tunnel, but without the frenzy to find the exit. Hardly anything exists in this state, nothing except for his target, his goal, and the way to get there. There is no place for feelings.

It's like looking through the scope of his Mantis, focussing on a target, hardly breathing before the shot. The calm before the storm. Probably just the particular mindset of a trained sniper. It always comes in handy, though, drives away the things that make it hard to think straight.

They don't talk when they're at the warehouse belonging to the address on Shepard's note, they don't have to. He's got the Predator with him already, in addition to the M-5 Phalanx that carries on a more or less day to day basis.

The warehouse is mildly guarded; not as heavily as he would have expected, but then again, having the area swarming with Blue Suns would just alarm C-Sec. There're two guards at the entrance, the Blue Suns' symbol is easily visible on their jackets – at least for a person who knows what to look for. For civilians, it might just look like a fancy brand; a blue sun motif branded into the arms of a leather jacket like a tattoo.

They're currently waiting around the corner, checking out the situation. Garrus has seen enough after spotting the two guards, readies his weapon. He hears Shepard readying her gun, too, from somewhere half-behind him.

“Leave it to me, okay?”, she whispers, and before he can answer, she shoots. Not at one of the mercenaries, but into a trash container a few metres behind them.

It has an immediate effect, though; both guards, now alarmed, take out their guns and one moves towards their position – the direction from which they heard the shot, of course.

When the guard steps into the line of their alley, Shepard acts immediately, grabs him by the collar of his jacket and hits him over the head with a move that can undoubtedly be considered as inspired by the Krogan fighting style.

Of course, this alarms the second guard. There's the sound of a communicator being used in the distance, but Shepard doesn't even wait for any word from his side – she storms forward, leaves their secured alley. And while the second guard can only ready his gun, she first shoots him into the foot and then hits him on the head, too.

All the while all that Garrus can do himself is cover her back. Not that he's sad the situation is solved.

“There'll be more”, he says as he closes up to Shepard. He gets down, searches the second guard. The communicator is still active, something he quickly remedies.“They must have heard the fighting.”

“Most likely”, Shepard replies. She's hardly breaking a sweat. “That a problem?”

“Not for me.”

He readies himself, presses his body flat onto the wall next to the door the men were guarding. Shepard, her gun held in front of her, opens the door.

The compound is smaller than the one they fought in a week ago, but full of security. While he's not particularly fond of dealing with all the minor things right now, it makes sense to disable the cams and scanners while they're moving through the factory.

They meet the first reinforcements of the entry guards just two rooms into the compound, incapacitate them. Garrus is fine with 'just' shooting them into their legs and disabling their communicators, at least at the moment.

They're not Harkin, and at this point, he doesn't even care if anyone witnesses what they're doing here. Mercenaries seldom go to the police with such things as raids on their hideouts.

There are more guards every now and then, but the closest thing to a challenge for him and Shepard are five of them in a larger depot with lots and lots of possibilities to hide. In the end though, all it does is that it empties his second magazine.

When they're through this room, Garrus has the strong feeling in his guts that it can't be far any more, that they're close. Someone has been meddling with the security controls of some doors during the fight, there was also an incident with a small freight carrier system that tried to drop a crate on them. He's pretty sure that there is someone in the control room; and pretty sure that someone is Harkin.

The control room has two exits; they need to be on both. He and Shepard exchange looks, they haven't talked at all on their way through the compound. She gestures to their left, he confirms with a nod and wants to move out to their right as Shepard puts a hand on his shoulder. She doesn't say anything as their eyes meet, only looks at him with a stern expression that reminds him too much of his father for his taste. When she lets him go, he doesn't waste any time or thoughts on it and gets underway to the right exit of the control room.

Everything works out as expected. He hears the first door on the left open, hurried footsteps, a short outcry. Then, just as his door is about to be torn open judging by the closeness of the footsteps, Garrus opens the second door himself.

“I don't think so, Harkin.”

A man scurries towards him and back as he sees him; a middle-aged, balding man with a face like a pug; eyes torn open.

Garrus is at his side in a heartbeat. He's at least a head taller than Harkin, and despite his preference for long-ranged weapons, he did have hand-to-hand training. It's easy to get a hold on the frightened man, and when he thinks about it – for someone with such a big codename, Fade is a surprisingly pathetic sight.

“So... Fade”, he says as he presses the other man against a wall, holding him at his collar. “Couldn't make yourself disappear, huh? Too bad you didn't want to leave your base of operations on the Citadel behind.”

“I... I'm sure we can work out a deal...”, Harkin stammers, Garrus hits him unceremoniously into the stomach.

“Wrong answer”, Shepard says tonelessly. She's toying with her gun to underline the utter casualness of her pose. “This doesn't have to end in bloodshed, you know.”

At this, Harkin's defiance awakens. He spits onto the ground next to Garrus. “Would've been more convincing if you didn't slaughter my guards on the way here.”

“Oh, you want it the hard way.” Shepard stops toying with the gun and is suddenly back to being commanding. She's clever to use Harkin's fear against him. “You can share in your guards' fate if you want to, of course.”

“What do you want? I don't even know you”, Harkin grumbles.

“I've had a nice chat with Fist”, says Shepard. Harkin's eyes are on her now, and on her alone. “He sends his regards.” When she cracks her knuckles, Garrus can literally see the sweat dropping down Harkin's forehead. He already reeks of cowardice.

“You've helped a friend of mine disappear”, Garrus says, drawing Harkin's attention back to him. “I need you to make him reappear. Simple.”

Harkin is quick to answer. “No way”, he says. It gets him a knee to the stomach this time.

“You've been C-Sec once, true”, Garrus hisses. “But now you're just a criminal. Give me one reason, just one.” He leaves the rest to Harkin's imagination, only lets his eyes trail towards his gun.

Then, he kicks Harkin into his stomach a last time before he lets him go stumbling back into the room, catching his breath and coughing a little.

Just like Shepard, Garrus takes out his gun again, too. “Arrange a meeting, that's all”, he says. “Just a meeting with one of your clients.”

“I don't give out client information”, Harkin says. Maybe not so much of a coward, then. He still hasn't regained his breath and an upright position, though. “It's bad for business.”

In a surge of anger that breaks through his calm, Garrus shoots into the shelf behind Harkin, takes two long strides and is at the man's side again, aiming his gun at Harkin's head.

“You know what else is bad for business?”, Garrus spits. “A hole though your head.”

Harkin's eyes widen, his pupils are dilated; good. His knees give in, he stumbles forward and needs to hold himself upright by clutching the desk.

“Lantar Sidonis”, Garrus says forcefully. “39. Turian. 188cm, 78kg, prioritised by Vosque – does that ring a bell?”

“Shit”, Harkin mutters, straightens up by pulling himself up on the desk. He's getting calmer again. “What do you... wait.”

He turns around to look at Garrus, caught somewhere between fear and a dawning realisation. He's a former cop, of course.

“You're... are you...” Harkin sizes him up now and the realisation settles in. “Oh fuck.”

“Seems like you did your homework”, Garrus drawls. Casually, he moves his finger closer to the trigger; slowly, Harkin's eyes following him every millimetre.

“Hey, you're a cop, too, right?”, Harkin says. He makes a gesture that is supposed to be placating, surely. “You wouldn't just shoot me. You're just making threats.”

“I _was_ a cop”, Garrus says coldly. Harkin's eyes grow even wider. “Quit the job. And when you know who I am, you know damn well what I've been through. Whom I've already killed. Tarak – does _that_ name ring a bell? I can get you right where he is now, your decision. One merc's life more or less doesn't make a difference to me.”

His finger nearly touches the trigger, there's a dead silence in the room before Harkin bursts out: “Okay...! Okay...” He makes a move over to the desk, and now Shepard also aims her gun at him. “Just need my phone, okay?”

There are still two guns trained on him as the phone in Harkin's hand connects.

“Yeah it's me”, he says into the phone. Only now it seeps into Garrus' mind that he was right all along; all those last days he _wasn't_ grasping at straws and chasing ghosts. It really is Sidonis on the other end of the line. “You're identity has been compromised. We need to meet. … Soon.”

Harkin looks up to Garrus, who only mutters: “Now.”

“Now”, Harkin repeats. “It's pretty... urgent; but I've got everything under control. … Okay, I'll sent one of my men.”

And then, the connection ends.

“He wants to meet with me on Silversun Strip at 6. Close to the tram station.”

Shepard nods, puts her gun away. Garrus isn't so quick with his own weapon, though.

Nobody would miss Harkin anyway; and he's working with the Blue Suns, and if it wasn't for him then...

“You wouldn't kill me now, would you?”, Harkin stammers as he notices Shepard leaving, but Garrus still not moving.

“No”, he gives back. He moves his gun to shoot Harkin's leg, though. They already incapacitated the whole compound, there's no way he'll let go the leader.

Shepard is faster, though. She still has her back turned on him, when she says: “You don't need to shoot him, Garrus. We've got everything we wanted and he won't escape. I'll call Bailey now.”

He doesn't know what it is that makes the anger boil this time, the thought that Harkin would get away with his life, or the fact that _now_ , so close to the target, Shepard would call Bailey.

Harkin looks relieved, Garrus can't stand it. That dirty coward of a former cop probably thinks he's let off the hook and can flee before C-Sec arrives, but not if Garrus has any say in that matter. He jerks forward, and in a fluid motion, he knocks Harkin out with the butt of his Phalanx.

Then, he turns around and follows Shepard, who just looks at him with a raised brow.

“I didn't shoot him”, he says coldly, doesn't stop and leaves the room, Shepard now at his heels. “Why now?”

“C-Sec needs to see this, we're still working for them and so far didn't do much vigilante-work.”

“Vigilante, nonsense”, he mutters. “You know Harkin will talk.”

“Then why didn't you shoot him?”, Shepard says sharply. She's caught up to him now, dials Bailey's number on her phone.

He has no answer to that. But somewhere within him, he knows she's right – he could have shot. He still can. He can go back and make sure Harkin won't talk of their visit, let it be damned what Shepard wants. He isn't sure what kind of person that makes him; maybe a coward, too.

“It's 4:30, we'll need forty-five minutes to Silversun Strip; an hour if we want to check the location. Bailey's going to be here in... maybe twenty minutes. Until he's through and questioned Harkin, it's maybe 5:30. You've got... about fifteen minutes with Sidonis, if Harkin sings.”

It's finally dawning on him that this is exactly what she wanted.


	19. Black and White - The Sweetest Taste (Garrus)

Silversun Strip is one of the best places on the Citadel for meeting someone. If one has shady dealings going on, of course; and maybe awaits to be shot by the one contact or the other.

The close casinos and the Armax Arena, as well as multiple hotels, bars and other establishments make it one of the most crowded places Garrus has ever seen – at every hour of the day. Even early in the morning, the place is crawling with people.

Cabs are coming in and leaving like ants in an oversized anthill, trams and buses drive through nearly once every minute.

It's extremely clever of Sidonis to ask for a meeting at this place, but Garrus has expected no less of him.

He and Shepard have stopped in one of the cab stands. He doesn't waste time talking, instead, looks over to the tram station, scanning every single person for the one man that kept him up every night for the last two years.

“So what's the plan?”, Shepard says, nearly casually.

For a moment he wants to reply something harsh, but keeps it back. She's here, standing through this with him; and for the moment, this must be enough, despite all that has just happened while meeting Harkin.

“It's not an ideal place, too many civilians”, Garrus says instead. “I could shoot from that hotel roof over there if I'd have my Mantis, but that's not an option now.”

If he isn't mistaken, Shepard takes a look around in the passenger's seat while he further scans the people on the station.

“Roof's got a buildup for the ventilation system”, she says. “Good place to hide.”

“Got security cams in the entrance and the elevators, too”, he replies. “No way we get to the roof undetected, much less so if three people get up but only two come down.”

Their talk is cold and professional for the moment, but it works just fine. “Can you get him into that alley?”, he says, gestures towards a small street next to the hotel. There's a ladder up towards the roof of the hotel, and it isn't particularly wide.

“Hey, you're talking about me here”, she says dryly. An attempt to relax the situation, of course. He can't make himself react to that, though.

“Good.”

He sets his focus back onto the people at the tram station. It takes a few more moments before his eyes land on a man who just drew closer to the station from one of the casinos. He takes a long breath as his hand closes around the grip of the Predator in his holster.

“There he is”, he brings out between clenched teeth. He feels Shepard moving her head over. “Tall, trenchcoat. Glasses, but they must be fake, his eyesight is alright. Briefcase, greying hair. Looks at his feet a lot, now close to the schedule on platform D.”

“Got him”, Shepard confirms.

Behind him, a door opens. “Shepard”, he says, holds her back. “Get him to the alley, make sure he waits for a minute or two. Then go back to the car and leave. I'll... take care of the rest.”

She raises a brow at him, but takes the car keys he's been holding out to her. A second later, the door falls shut and her legs appear in the front window.

This is it. The hunt is on.

In a heartbeat, he's out of the car, too. Doesn't care that they're parking on a cab stand, just hurries over towards the hotel; back in his tunnel. There's only one exit; a man who lived two years too long, and three bullets in an old pistol.

He's not even in position when his phone rings. He takes it out just to cancel the call, but it's Shepard, and so he accepts.

“Complications?”

There's ambient noises on the line, she's put her phone on loud. He finds her red hair in the crowd, she's tinkering with something on her ear.

“No, just wanted to make sure the earpiece works. It's better we stay in contact.” She's nearly whispering, and the noises of the people around her almost drown her voice. “You hear me?”

“Yes”, he says curtly. Though strictly speaking, he doesn't see a reason for this at all – the distance between them is less than three hundred metres. Situation control should be easy enough by keeping an eye on the other.

“Okay. I'm nearly there.”

He doesn't reply – she's nearly reached the man in the trenchcoat. His eyes are dry, he hasn't blinked in a minute at least. It's not the first time that he follows a situation on the comm, but this time is different.

The next time he hears Shepard's voice, she stands next to the man in the trenchcoat.

“Hey”, she says shortly. He would say she has her hands in her jacket's side pockets, sounds rather casual. “You know a guy named Fade?”

There's no immediate reaction from the man in the trenchcoat. From what Garrus can see, he's mustering her first, isn't moving his head away from her.

“I do”, he then answers. His voice is calm apart from the undertones of apprehension that Garrus probably only notices because he's known Sidonis for so long.

There's a break in his calm sniper's mindset as he grabs the Predator, as two years of anger burn through his veins with the confirmation that he has been right.

“Did he sent you?”, says Sidonis.

“You could say that”, Shepard answers.

Her choice of words isn't lost on Sidonis, who jerks back a very tiny bit before he realises that he's in the middle of a crowded place where a bus drives through every minute. “What do you mean?”, he presses through a half-closed mouth.

“I'm here because of Fade, and I need you to come with me.” There it is again, the tone that doesn't allow for any words on the contrary. “I'm here to help you.”

For a moment, Garrus isn't sure that Sidonis buys it, he looks as if he wants to jump between the next buses and make a run for it. But then he says: “Follow you where?”

“See the blue CUV over there?”, Shepard says, points towards his car. A good thing it's a new car, not the one Garrus used to drive two years ago. “You don't need to get inside, just follow me there.”

There's a brief silence, and Garrus' heart – against his calm – skips a beat. But Sidonis takes the bait, follows Shepard towards the car.

“I take it you've got the papers inside”, Sidonis mutters tersely as they move through the crowd of people.

Garrus lets his hand slide towards the Predator, melts into the shadows a bit more, closer to the wall of the hotel.

“No”, Shepard says bluntly.

Sidonis jerks back for real this time, Shepard grabbing him by the wrist; just as Garrus quickly raises the gun. It's maybe two hundred metres, if Shepard is doing nonsense right now, he's taking the shot from a distance, pistol or not.

“What the---”

“I say it again”, Shepard interrupts Sidonis with such determination that the man briefly stops. “I'm here to help you, Sidonis.”

She doesn't wait for a reaction, continues moving, now dragging Sidonis behind her a bit. “Don't ever say that name out loud!”

A soundless curse leaves Garrus' lips. What the hell is Shepard trying over there? At least, she is still moving towards him.

One hundred and fifty metres.

“Who are you?”

“A friend of someone who's very angry at you”, Shepard replies. Sidonis struggles against her grasp now, but she is undeterred. Thankfully, so are all the other people. 

“I'm out of here”, Sidonis presses forward, his struggles increases. It's still more than a hundred metres, and now, they have stopped coming closer. 

“No, you're not”, Shepard states plainly. She has him in a tight lock, Sidonis isn't going anywhere. Which is technically good, if Shepard wouldn't block a clear line of sight towards Sidonis. Even small as she is, the way she stands it's hard to get an aim anywhere but on the upper part of Sidonis' head. 

It's a shot for a sniper rifle, not a shot for a handgun, and Shepard knows that. “I'm also currently the only thing keeping you alive.”

“What do you...?” Sidonis' struggles stop. He looks as if he's about to enter the same state of mental quiet that Garrus often uses, too; but currently, it is hard to maintain. And indeed, Sidonis starts taking in his surrounding in more detail now. “Who sent you?”

“Shepard, you're in my line”, Garrus hisses into his phone. He keeps it in the breast pocket of his shirt, close enough that the microphone gets his voice. “Get him closer and leave.”

“Is it Monteague's family? Erash's fiancé? Mierin's daughter?”

Garrus hasn't expected this, and for the first time that he can remember, his hand is shaky although he carries a gun. Sidonis' voice is calm, collected – how dare he says those names as if he's...

“No”, Shepard says bluntly. “Nobody sent me.”

“But who---“

“Aren't those the people you killed?”, Shepard says, her own voice has turned cold. “Monteague, Erash, Mierin?”

“Move it, Shepard”, Garrus says once more, he has to. He can get an aim on Sidonis' head, and that needs to be enough. He wouldn't hit Shepard, of course he wouldn't. But this needs to end, before that traitor has the opportunity to speak of the other three, too; to name all those who wait for an end of this nightmare. “I'm taking the shot from here, just go.”

Shepard doesn't answer, and neither does she move.

Sidonis, though, sinks into his trenchcoat. “Nobody sent you, but you know those names?”, he whispers. Garrus doesn't want to trust his ears, he can't trust his ears. What he thinks to hear is just a figment of his mind. Just imagination. It _has_ to be.

“Obviously”, Shepard replies.

“Is this some form of game? Did Vosque sent you to spy on me? Tell him I haven't forgotten our deal but as long as....”

“Out of my way, Shepard!” This time, Garrus can't keep his voice low, he isn't even trying.

And it's loud enough to make Sidonis take notice of the earpiece. 

Garrus needs to shoot now. Right now. But Shepard just casually moves a step further into his line of sight. “What the hell are you doing there, Shepard!”

What happens next feels like slow motion. Sidonis, who's back to being hyper aware of his surrounding, gets a look into the alley Garrus stands in, and in the low morning sun, the Predator gleams in his hand. Eyes torn open Sidonis' focus shifts to the owner of the gun, and for a split second, Garrus knows their eyes meet.

The reaction is immediate. Sidonis tries a close combat technique on Shepard, who simply blocks and turns Sidonis' hands onto his back.

And for the first time, Garrus has a clear line of shot; Shepard is now behind Sidonis. There are other people getting curious, but Garrus hardly cares.

He just has to shoot. Head. Shoulder. Even his heart; Shepard is small enough that if the shot goes through, Sidonis' heart is in one line with her shoulder. Garrus' hand isn't shaking anymore. This is the moment he has been waiting for for two years; the moment he lost hours of sleep every night over, and after this...

“Tell Garrus to shoot, I'll even wait until you're out of line.” 

It feels as if Sidonis – without even a gun – is the first one to shoot, though; and suddenly, Garrus feels his hands sweating on the Predator. No, there can't be resignation in that voice. No, there is no regret. No, there isn't...

“They caught me, you know”, Sidonis says meekly over his shoulder. “Some Blue Sun mercs figured out I was _Archangel's_ second-in-command, caught me on Omega. They'd have killed me if I wouldn't have... If I hadn't... fed Garrus and the team two different stories, separated them.”

“And so you led your people to the slaughter”, Shepard says. 

“There's not a day I don't regret it”, Sidonis mutters.

The Predator gets slippery in his hand, this... this cannot be true. 

“And if this is how it's going to end, I'm not running. I've been doing that for two years too long.” 

Regret. Resignation. They can't be there, but...

“I'm not leaving you here”, says Shepard.

“Just go. I won't run.”

... they are. 

It's almost as if he's holding onto a stone in the rain instead of a gun, as if he simply wants to lower his arms and sink onto the ground.

This can't be true, this isn't what he's been looking for all those years. But he can make it right, he just needs to shoot. Just calm himself for another ten seconds or so and be done with it, Sidonis is even asking him for it. It's almost too easy, and it's justified, more than justified after the last two years.

With a bit of effort, he collects his thoughts, enters his tunnel. The people around have calmed down again, he just needs to shoot right and make a run for it. 

“Garrus, you heard him, right?”, Shepard says. Then, and he can't even believe his eyes, she lets go of Sidonis and takes a couple of steps away from him. This is his chance, but...

... what then?

What comes after justice, after... revenge? Will it be over or will it...

“Do it, Garrus”, says Sidonis.

And Garrus lets the Predator sink down, out of his tunnel, away from certainty. 

Sidonis sees it, of course. He always was a good cop, at least when it came to his skills. “What are you...”

“Call Bailey”, Garrus croaks into the direction of his phone. “Tell him that you've captured a wanted Turian criminal. Commissioner Pallin will be pleased that this is... over with.”

“Roger that.”

As if he needs to make it official, he secures the Predator like in an automated movement that he can't think too much about, lest he'd stop; and takes out the half-empty magazine.

His fingers move over the space where he edged in the names of the people _Archangel_ has cost their lives. He's promised their spirits that he would get them justice, get their families closure. But now...

His eyes fall on the bar of a hotel, open even at this early hour; the only good thing about Silversun Strip in the morning. Then, they move to Sidonis, to his hanging shoulders, his nearly feeble steps as Shepard is now leading him to his car; a shell of the man he used to know and a far cry from the villain he wanted to meet.

For a moment, he's looked into Sidonis' eyes and saw something deeply unsettling; the ghost of everything that haunts his former second-in-command – the same things that haunt Garrus every night, too. It's familiar yet alienating; he doesn't want to admit it, doesn't even want to feel it – but he knows it. Knows it better than anyone else how Sidonis feels; and Sidonis knows better than anyone else how he feels. Just that one is a traitor, albeit probably an unwilling one, and the other...

He breathes in so deeply as if he wants the air to reach his feet, puts the Predator back into its holster. Then, he moves towards his car where Shepard dials Bailey's number.

“Can you take... take care of him until Bailey arrives?”, he says to her when he's close enough. It's as if all the sleep he has missed out on during the last week comes back to hit him all at once now. “I think I need a drink.”

She smiles at him over her shoulder, the first real smile he's seen in days. Somewhere deep down the dark pits of his soul, it's utterly relieving. Somewhere else, it's mortifying. And still somewhere else, his own thoughts ring through his head over and over again: he's a coward. He broke his promise.

Sidonis shakes with him near, sinks even more into his trenchcoat. He looks towards the street, makes no attempts to run, no attempt to free himself from Shepard's grasp.

The closeness makes a shiver run down Garrus' spine, too; gives rise to thoughts about grabbing the Predator and just damn all that made him stop before. But there's a bar waiting for him.

“I'm sorry, Garrus”, Sidonis mutters with a broken voice as Garrus already moves away.

He hears it, but doesn't slow down or look back even though something heavy and cold lies in his stomach and he wants to turn around.

Maybe in a while, it would sink in that letting Sidonis live was the right decision.


	20. Intermezzo - Grey (Garrus)

The looks he receives from the barman as he orders a beer and the strongest brandy in stock say a lot about how down-at-heel Garrus must look. They are almost pitiful, almost as if the barman expects that Garrus had just lost all of his fortune and then some on a roulette table, spent a week trying to win it back and just lost more.

And maybe, that's exactly how he feels; it's really hard to get a grasp on those feelings at the moment.

Inside his mind, there's not much apart from a big cloud of a uniform grey substance. Here and there there's a peak of anger at himself, of feeling like a coward, but it never takes long until the peak vanishes into the grey mass of nothingness again.

This isn't how he expected things with Sidonis to end.

There were supposed to be three holes in his head, no judge, no jury. Just execution.

But now, there's going to be a trial. Hearings. An uncertain end; a rat's tail of things ahead of him and confrontations he isn't certain about.

His father wouldn't miss Sidonis' trial, not a single day of it.

And Garrus would have to meet both in the courtroom; he isn't deluding himself, he's going to be a witness in the trial. 

He could have ended all of that sooner.

And still, somewhere in that grey uniform mass of feelings, there's something that is glad that things didn't end like he originally planned. Not that that something gives him any more certainty about his decision, though.

He's considering a second beer when a red-headed someone falls down on the chair next to him and orders: “The same he had.”

“A beer and a brandy then...”, the barman mutters with raised brows; probably thinks Shepard lost all of her fortune, too.

“Make it two beer”, Garrus says. They probably look extremely pathetic next to each other.

The brandy in front of Shepard doesn't last long. She downs it in one big gulp, then shakes her head at the taste. 

A mirthless chuckle moves over his face – Cipritine brandy isn't the same as Krogan Ryncol; it's a whole different sort of strong.

But Shepard wouldn't be Shepard if she wouldn't catch herself fast. “I talked to Bailey. We've got to be at the precinct at 4pm to give our statements. I don't know about you, but I'm going to catch some shut-eye until then.” 

“Agreed”, he mutters into his beer. Sleep sounds suddenly like a very good idea, he hasn't given it much thought lately; probably not a very good decision from a clinical standpoint. “What about Sidonis?”

He knows the answer, of course. He still needs to hear it, to get the confirmation that he can't do anything right now.

“Bailey took him into custody, phoned your Commissioner Pallin when I mentioned the name”, Shepard replies. She sounds rather casual, but she's tired, too; can't hide it from him. “They're currently sorting out technicalities and try to confirm his identity.”

Garrus only nods mutely, feels that Shepard looks over to him. “Sidonis hasn't made any attempts at fleeing or anything. I don't know him as well as you do, but I think he's even... glad, that it's over.”

In another big gulp, Garrus empties half of his beer. It's not what he wanted to hear; not at all – but he knows Shepard is right. 

What he doesn't know right now is what that knowledge does to him.

Silence falls on them, only broken by the clinking of glasses and the occasional sound of crushed ice in a glass. Shepard empties her beer fast, too; and the thought crosses his mind that she could go now. After all, she wanted to sleep, and everything's over now.

But she doesn't leave; like she's never left his side through the last few days. Even when she went to Tali for help, and talked to Fist without him; even then, she only did it because he left her no other option. However, Shepard plays her own games at times, thanks to an ability he has just proven that he doesn't possess: foresight.

“You always knew I wouldn't shoot, didn't you”, he more states than asks a while later. “You helped me get to Harkin, get to Sidonis even if you called Bailey.”

She raises her head over her shoulder, flashes him a little grin that looks a bit cat-like, but melts into a softer smile soon. “You've got to trust your friends to make the right decisions, that's the same in and out of the military.”

He lets it settle for a moment, takes time to think about his next words. “Even without you in my line of sight, though... I couldn't take the shot.”

“You know what my commanding officer used to say back when I was with the Alliance?”, Shepard says, “The line of good and evil blurs when you're dealing with people you know.”

He lets out a low snort, avoids to look at her. Part of him doesn't really want to talk about it, but another needs to answer. “I wanted him to be evil, if you want to call it like that”, he admits, more to himself than to Shepard. “But... our eyes met for a second or so and... I don't know if the villain I wanted to meet would've been capable of that... remorse.”

“I hear you”, Shepard says quietly. “Things are never that clear cut, I've learned that, too.”

“When you look at the world and see only black and white, it's easy”, he says. It's one of these rare things that just leave his mouth without him spending too much thought on them. “Grey? I don't know what to do with grey.”

In more than one way, it seems.

“Trust your instincts.”

As he snorts into his beer a second time, he begins to wonder what the barman thinks of them and at the same time, he doesn't care. “My instincts are what got us into this mess in the first place.”

“But you were right”, Shepard points out. She downs her beer and looks over to him, he can't avoid her right now. “It was Sidonis all along – and think about it: your determination to find him and be sure gave us the chance to arrest him, and it gives the families of your friends the possibility of closure when Sidonis gets his trial.”

It hits a sore spot, somewhere in that mass of feelings inside him. “I could've given them the closure of knowing the bastard who killed their loved ones is dead.”

“Do you really think that brings closure?”, she says. It sounds duller than she usually speaks, more emotionless. 

She's been there, too; he knows that – been where she lost her whole unit in a desert operation called _Akuze_ to the guerilla tactic of a local tribe. If anyone apart from Sidonis knows where he's been, it's her.

“I wouldn't sit here if I would”, he admits. “I'd probably be on the run from the police, Sidonis would have three bullets in his head and you a perforated shoulder.”

That doesn't sound that appealing, suddenly. Because...

“There you have it”, she says with a mirthless chuckle made entirely of gallows humour.

… in contrast to the SWAT operative Garrus Vakarian, the private investigator has something to lose.

“It probably just takes time, huh?”, he says to Shepard after a while. “Because I need to know I did the right thing.”

“It took time before, didn't it?”, Shepard says. She looks at him with that expression in her eyes that says she knows exactly what she's talking about. Maybe even too well. “Scars always fade.”

“Though they never heal”, he continues.

She nods slowly, he orders both of them another round of brandy from the perplexed barman who gives him a look as if he's tried hard not to listen to them.

After the shot is empty, the grey in his mind seems less frightening and a little less uniform.

“Thanks, Shepard. For seeing this through with me.”

“Selfish interest”, she says; lopsided smirk and raised brows and all. “I couldn't lose my partner.”

“Oh, I'm flattered”, he replies dryly. 

“No really, Garrus”, Shepard says, more sincere now. “You know about Akuze, you know I couldn't...” She's taking a deep breath, squints at him and he understands. “After the thing with Arterius, I couldn't imagine anyone else as my partner, and I couldn't do this without you having my back.”

His father used to say that a murder always took more than one life. He doesn't know why he remembers this right now, but he does; and suddenly, he can't help but feel glad that this situation with Sidonis didn't take his life. Or Shepard's. “Of course you could”, he still gives back to Shepard. “Just not as stylishly. And with more technical difficulties.”

Shepard slaps him on the arm for that, but laughs a little. It feels more relieving that he would care to admit out loud. 

There's someone else involved in this, though; someone who shouldn't even be there but still is. And Garrus can't help but feel glad that this wouldn't influence Tali's life. At least not too much.

“Speaking of technical difficulties, though. We need to speak to Tali.”

“Agreed”, Shepard says. “I'm giving her a call when we're back home and invite her around. I guess I owe her an apology.”

Before they even leave the bar, though, Garrus takes out his phone and types in a message; it just feels like the right thing to do.

_Garrus: I've been commendable for once, everything played out more or less peacefully. Shepard's gonna call you when we're back home._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been listening to [this song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7J0QdXBY0wo) while I was writing this chapter. It's not a perfect fit, but I like that the song is so driven and feels kind of restless, which is so fitting to Garrus' situation here.
> 
> A lot of dialogue from the last few chapters is very close to the actual dialogue of Garrus' loyalty mission in ME2, just saying this here as a disclaimer.


	21. Intermezzo - Garrus (Tali)

She can't say she slept when her phone drives the last bits of drowsiness away.

The first thing she feels when she reads Vakarian's message is relief; the second is realising that it's weird that he knows she knows and she knows he knows that she knows. She's written that message yesterday in a haze of too many feelings after her visit at Wrex', and for her early morning, tired and not caffeinated self, their situation has too much 'knows' in it by far. Thankfully, it's Saturday and there are no lectures today. 

She still types back before she gets herself a coffee, though. 

_Tali: Good._

It's all she can say, because she honestly doesn't know how to feel about all of this. 

Shepard really calls half an hour later, starts out with a solemn apology about 'all the mess they created' and invites her around for Sunday. 

Tali accepts rather quickly. 

Even if she tried to think about what happened between her and Shepard and what the information she collected would be used for and if she's fine with the consequences, Tali isn't sure if she can decide yet if she wants to feel somewhat used by Shepard or somewhat betrayed for not being told the full truth from the start. It's more complex than simple truth, she knows that. 

And probably, just meeting Shepard would shed light onto all that is left unclear. 

It's not Shepard who opens the door when she rings, though; it's a very tired looking Vakarian. 

“Tali... hey”, he greets her, gestures her into the hall and into the living room. “Shepard's just around the corner getting something from the bakery. She tried baking you a cake, didn't end well.” 

“She baked me a cake?”, Tali says despite all the other questions she has, and despite feeling a little awkward about all the 'I know you know's in her head. 

“Apology gift”, Vakarian replies with a shrug. “The burnt remains are still in the kitchen, if you want to see it.” 

And indeed, as their flat has an open kitchen, it's rather hard to overlook the black something on the counter that looks suspiciously like a molehill and reeks horribly even though all windows are opened. 

“That is... sweet of her”, Tali says, a little stiff because she's sincerely perplexed. 

“It used to be sweet, now it's ashes”, Vakarian gives back. “Come to think of it, maybe sitting in the living room isn't such a good idea.” 

“No, I'm going to be fine here. Can I---” 

“--- the sofa, of course.” 

It's a black and white leather two-seater with a fitting armchair and a small table. She quickly takes seat on it, it feels a little cold and new. Vakarian quietly sits down on the armchair. 

It's as if she can hear the clock ticking in the following moments, the elephant in the room is simply that massive. 

It's hard to block out that she still feels guilty about reading the _Archangel_ files, even if Vakarian doesn't seem to be bothered much by it. It's also hard to suppress her curiosity about what actually happened after Shepard left her room on Friday morning; but it's not as if she could just ask. 

“So...uhm, I...”, Vakarian suddenly starts, clears his throat even. She has never seen him lost for words before. “I suppose I should thank you. The information on Harkin has been invaluable, and it was what finally lead Shepard and me to... the man we were following.” 

And she certainly hasn't expected that he would thank her. 

“This... is pretty awkward”, she presses through a barely opened mouth, looks at her hands in her lap. 

“No, it's easy. Without you, we couldn't have done this in time, and---” 

“I'm sorry”, she interrupts him, her eyes shooting up to see his usually so stoic face showing something akin to surprise. “I need to get this out of the room, even if I know that you know that I know... well. That I read your SWAT files. The encrypted ones. It... wasn't the right thing to do, and I'm sorry about that.” 

The surprise vanishes into his usual poker face, but he is still tired. His eyes aren't as cold as they usually are. “We should be sorry for dragging you into this. Even if I insisted not to, but that doesn't matter”, he says. “And by the way, if I had your hacking skills, I'd have read my files, too.” 

That he really isn't bothered by her knowing his story is surprising, in a way. She'd have expected him to be the kind of person who is very secretive about things like these. And still, she doesn't feel totally relieved. “But me reading this... took away your right of deciding who you want to share this story with”, she says. “And I only realised this after I read your files. That's why I'm sorry. And then there's another thing...” He scrutinises her, not as intensely today, but he does. But she needs to get this other thing out of the way, too. “I... spoke about this with Wrex. About helping Shepard, and reading your files. I needed someone to talk to because... I just couldn't make anything of it. But I shouldn't have.” 

There's a moment in which everything he does is to look at her. “You're right”, he then says, almost carefully. “Maybe you shouldn't have spoken about this. But on the other hand, Wrex is a Krogan, and I'm a Turian. And if there's one thing Krogans and Turians have in common, it's that nearly everyone of us has a few skeletons in their closets. You probably didn't tell him anything he didn't already know or at least guessed.” She hasn't expected him to take this second news as easy as he apparently does. “And speaking about things like that isn't... easy. But... I guess it can't hurt either that if you have any question about all this mess, I try to answer them best I can. Before you get the wrong idea about me, I mean.” 

“Are you serious?” 

“Yes.” 

This isn't how she expected things to play out – in all of her meetings before, Vakarian has hardly said a word to her that didn't entail work, her nationality (he's made it a habit of asking her about Quarian culture) or Shepard; maybe Wrex. He never spoke much about himself, much less about something of that calibre. 

Maybe there is more to him than an uptight Turian. 

“Thank you, but...”, she says. “For the moment I'm... not sure where I stand yet.” 

“Of course.” He nods slowly, checks the clock. “It's just an offer. There are probably a lot of things unclear, and half-truths can be rather grating.” 

“That's true”, she says dryly. 

He makes a half-attempt at a smile before they lapse into silence. She just doesn't know what to say with him around. 

The clock ticks mercilessly, he looks on his watch, too. As if to remind her that this whole situation is odd. 

At least, she never would have guessed it would turn out like this. And if Vakarian is truly sorry about the way things went, Shepard is more than likely to feel the same. Which she can't deny to appreciate, maybe this situation wouldn't end on a negative note for them, after all. 

“There is one thing I'd like to know, though”, she says after a while, after thinking about everything again and sorting out parts of her feelings. Vakarian just nods in silence. “I take it this... target of yours...” 

“Sidonis.” 

“Yes. This man. He is going to face a trial, right?” 

She eyes Vakarian a little too curiously, but he doesn't seem agitated. Or does he? Shepard is at least easy to read when she wants to be, which is most of the time. With him, however, she isn't always so sure; and now, also his voice is back to being rather even. “They're taking him to Cipritine for that today, yes.” 

“Am I going to have to give a statement?” 

Vakarian comes back to life at this question, it seems; his eyes widen shortly and his features grow a bit more like his usual, stoic self. “Not an easy question.” 

“An important one for me”, she states, he nods. 

“Of course”, he says, sighs a little. “Well, let me formulate it like this: I officially have the information about Harkin from Shepard. So that's what I told Bailey. Shepard told him she got the intel from an unspecified informant.” 

Tali can't help it, she releases a breath she hasn't realised she has been holding. The idea of having to explain to auntie Raan how she ended up in this hasn't been appealing at all. 

Noticing her relief though, Vakarian is quick to add: “Though Bailey isn't the problem here. He's not the type to ask too many questions. 'An unspecified informant' is going to be enough for him. A Turian court is more likely to go into detail.” 

“Meaning?”

“That I can't make promises. I won't name you if they don't force me to, and I can't imagine they will. Shepard's charming as hell, so if she tells the story about the 'unspecified informant' it's not unlikely a judge will simply decide that the fact who got us the intel is all in all irrelevant. Sidonis went with Bailey willingly. That matters most, and we don't need to convict him for tried identity fraud. They'll get him for something far worse, and for that, they have a witness.” 

The last words aren't easy for him, even with his poker face it's easy to see. It's hard not to think of the fact that she knows he's lost his whole unit to the betrayal of someone he must have trusted implicitly. He's only a bit less than four years older than her, but right now, it seems like a lifetime. 

He looks at the watch again, and then, the moment of reflection is gone. “Hey... this is impolite, but can I leave you alone? I need to go to the precinct again to meet Commissioner Pallin, and Shepard's not yet back...” 

“Of course, I won't steal anything.” 

Only after the words are out, she realises how it must sound from the mouth of a Quarian. 

“Never said you would”, Vakarian replies, a small smirk tugging at his lips. “Nothing to steal anyway. We don't keep around metal scraps and junk.” 

“Well you've got a computer somewhere around here, and there's a TV”, she says with casual disdain. “But I bet both are old models and not worth salvaging.” 

She isn't sure to trust her ears when she hears Vakarian chuckle. “Who watches TV anyway. It's Shepard's, so help yourself.” 

“I happen to like watching TV at times.” 

“There must be a remote somewhere around, feel free to watch... what girls like to watch.” 

“What is that supposed to mean?”, she says sharply. In one way or another, it's good that he's back to his casual way of coldness, on the other, he's also back to being... well, Garrus Vakarian. 

“That's supposed to mean nothing”, he replies from the hallway where he's putting on shoes and a jacket. “I just don't know what you're watching. Probably not football or the live-broadcasts from Armax Arena.” 

“The broadcasts are usually fun.” 

“Channel 35.” 

“I thought you didn't watch TV.” 

“That's an exception.” 

He gets up from tying his shoes as she plays around with the remote she found on a small table with a plant on it 

“Well... see you around, then”, he says, raises a hand in a goodbye-gesture. It almost sounds a little … hopeful? 

“Yes, I think so”, she gives back. If Shepard really wants to clear up things the way he tried to clear it up, Tali is positive that she is going to come back here again. “Good luck on the precinct. See you.” 

“Thanks.” 

He turns around and moves to the door. For a moment, and she has no idea why it is this utterly unremarkable moment, it's hard to ignore that beyond everything, beyond the PI who usually annoys her with his insensitivity and beyond the Turian ex-cop; he's just a tall, lanky man in his late twenties, who appears much older than that. And not even that seems to matter right now. 

“Garrus?”, she says after him as the door is already opened. “I'm glad for you that this is going to be over soon.” 

“Yeah”, he drawls. For a moment, Tali thinks he wants to say more, but doesn't. “Soon.” 

And when the door falls shut, she decides that beyond all the superficial stuff, he's just a human being, even with all his flaws. 


	22. Intermezzo - On Both Sides (Tali)

Fifteen minutes later, the sound of a door being opened announces Shepard's return. On the TV screen, the latest match in the Armax Arena is just nearing its end.

“Who's playing?”, Shepard says against the sound of firing from the broadcast. Tali can't see her yet, she's still in the hallway taking off her shoes.

“Pro league obstacle course, Vega vs Williams”, Tali returns. The obstacle course is one of Armax Arena's highlights; a virtual reality simulation in a room build especially for that purpose and staffed with several physical obstacles and randomly appearing targets that the contestants need to eliminate with a laser gun. It's high-end technology – which is a big part of the reason why Tali enjoys it so much.

“Oh, Vega's on!”, Shepard says, her head popping into the living room door. “The boy's got style! Technique's a little rough here and there, but there's potential!”

“He's losing”, Tali says dryly, Shepard lets out a low grunt. “Williams is matching him in accuracy and endurance, but she's beating him in speed.”

“Hey, I know her.” Shepard is standing in the door frame now, eyes glued to the screen as Williams finishes the course just two seconds faster than Vega. She's carrying a sizeable box in her hands that has a red ribbon and a cake printed on. “She's a cop, I've seen her on the Presidium precinct once, I think.”

“They announced her as Second Detective Ashley Williams, so you're probably right.”

“I didn't know they let cops perform there. Vega's a fitness coach in real life, I think.” Her eyes still half on the screen, Shepard leaves her position and moves into the kitchen, puts the box onto the counter next to the molehill that used to be cake.

“Well, it's the pro league”, Tali says. “I think they let anyone good enough perform in the pro league.”

“I could try it, that obstacle course is a piece of cake. Or I'll get Garrus and Wrex to work together and we're trying the pro team challenge!”

“Wrex in your team would be unfair”, Tali says. And it's true; Wrex and Grunt together would be like a steam roller moving through the obstacle course, crashing everything in their wake.

As the broadcast changes back towards the usual transmissions of the amateur league, Tali switches off the TV. The sounds from the kitchen appear louder now; cabinet doors falling shut, platters, cups.

A few seconds later, Shepard takes seat in the armchair Garrus has left vacant after having put a large platter with at least five different pastries and cake on the small coffee table. In the background the sound of a coffee machine can be heard.

“I hope you like éclairs. I love them.”

She really brought a lot of them; the chocolate-covered pastries take up at least a fourth of the whole assortment. And they do look nice – chocolate is always a good thing and cream filling is, too. And there is cream on nearly everything Shepard brought.

Which is probably a problem. “Shepard, that's really sweet of you, but ---”

“Don't worry, everything is lactose-free”, Shepard says quickly and grins. “I remember that you took lactose-free yoghurt that one time we've been out with Liara. Quarian thing, isn't it?”

“Yes, it is. Most Quarians are lactose-intolerant, it's genetic”, Tali replies. She can't help a little smile, too; this little gesture alone is worth more than Tali would have imagined two days ago in Wrex' bar, when things looked rather more dire than they do over live broadcasts from Armax Arena and lots and lots of lactose-free pastries.

“One thing you've got in common with Turians, I've heard”, Shepard says. She's already half into her first éclair; a bit of the chocolate sticks to her nose now. She doesn't seem to mind.

Tali, on her part, feels a little stupid. It's probably the only thing she has in common with Garrus apart from their affinity for technology – they're both lactose-intolerant – and she only realises it now; and that after all the times he's asked her about the rumours of the 'weak Quarian immune system'. “Seems like it...”

“Speaking of which.” Shepard puts the last quarter of her first eclair down onto a platter, takes another one and carries it back into the kitchen, puts it into the fridge. “I'm being a good flatmate and keep one for Garrus.”

“He doesn't seem the type for sweets”, Tali admits. They're starting to dance around the elephant in the room when the topic reaches Garrus now.

Shepard, on her way back into the living room, giggles. “Oh doesn't he? He sometimes kills a whole bar of chocolate when we're discussing an investigation. The dark one, of course. He also swears it tastes good together with whiskey, but I'm not so sure there.”

“Don't look at me, I wouldn't know. I'm more a vodka person, apparently.”

A little silence emerges as Tali finally decides on a cupcake with a strikingly pink icing as her first course and Shepard gets up another time to get them coffee. When she comes back, though, she looks far more official.

“Well... while we're at it... Did you talk to Garrus before he left?”

There's always something dropping in her stomach when someone finally mentions the elephant in the room, even though she anticipated the change in topics. “Yes, I did.”

Shepard nods slowly, carefully; leans back into the armchair. She'd look like some form of thoughtful teacher, if not for the dot of chocolate still on her nose and the quarter of an eclair still on her platter. “I thought so”, she says. “Well... then you're probably a bit better in the picture than before.”

“A little”, Tali says. “He offered that I ask whatever question I have regarding... regarding _Archangel_ or his former colleague.”

When Tali mentions the name of the mission that indirectly caused all of this, Shepard draws in air through her teeth and massages her temples. “I'm sorry how this all played out, Tali. Really sorry. I should've told you … more.”

“What would you have said?”, Tali asks out loud what she's been thinking about ever since Garrus sent her that SMS giving her all-clear. “That you needed me to find someone that would lead you to a person Garrus wanted revenge on?”

For more than the usual fleeting moment, Shepard's features mirror something akin to a little shock as the words hang in the room like dark curtains. “That I needed you to find someone so that I could prevent Garrus from making a bad mistake”, she finally says, calm again.

It sounds nearly passable to Tali, nearly. “Would you have mentioned that Garrus... mentioned it _if_ he would have wanted to kill someone?”

“I wouldn't have let him”, Shepard says, now utterly determined.

“Would you have mentioned it?”, Tali repeats. She's putting more emphasis on these words, and Shepard looks a little taken aback again, but this time, only for a second.

“I don't know”, she admits. “Probably I wouldn't have asked you for help if I saw a chance that this went south.”

“You really never thought it would escalate?”, Tali asks, even though something that felt very tight and constricting in her chest ever since Thursday night starts to loosen up. It's all so similar to what Wrex and Grunt told her about Shepard, about Garrus.

“I always knew I wouldn't let it come that far”, Shepard replies, just as Tali expected. She still needed to hear it, though. “It's.. a bit difficult to describe. It's something Garrus had to figure out himself, you know? That things didn't need to escalate, that he could end things with Sidonis without three bullets through that guy's head.”

“But initially, he wanted to...?”

“Yes”, Shepard says solemnly.

It's still hard to think of Garrus as a murderer, even though she knows he's taken lives before. Shepard has, too. Wrex, Grunt. All of her new friends and acquaintances, apart from Liara.

On the flip side, it's also hard not to at least see where a wish for revenge and compensation comes from in case of _Archangel_.

It's like a maze in Tali's head now, the wrong and right turns of decisions, the differences of moral high ground and human emotion. How could someone intent to murder someone else? How could someone not intend to murder someone who is a traitor and caused the death of six people he swore to protect? How can one leave out such crucial details when asking for help, and how can one even talk about them?

“Well... I shouldn't have read the _Archangel_ -files in the first place”, Tali mutters to break the silence that emerged as she followed the maze in her head to an unsatisfactory end. “I shouldn't even have known about this Sidonis, or the Blue Suns, or … anything about it. And without that knowledge, I don't know if I'd even suspected that there must be someone Garrus wanted revenge on.”

Shepard has kept on eyeing her calmly, now sighs a little. “And if everything would've worked according to plan, nothing would have happened that should've aroused even a tiny bit of suspicion from you that topics like revenge and murder were involved.”

“In hindsight that's always easy to say, isn't it?”

“I was never a fan of too much shoulds and woulds and coulds”, Shepard says, shrugs rather lengthily and takes the rest of her eclair. “Next time, I'll be more careful and give you as much background info as I can. If there's even going to be a next time is entirely your choice, though.”

There is her door to back out, and Shepard already opened it. She can just go through it, tell Shepard that it's nice being her friend, but that there isn't going to be any help from her side any more when it comes to a case.

Maybe just some technical stuff, like repairing and upgrading drones and other vehicles. Or doing some filtering of videos. Or hacking some webpages of minor suspects, or...

She can't decide right now if there's ever going to be something as big as the last case though. It's all too fresh, all too confusing. And maybe, she doesn't even need to decide right now, as long as she knows that next time, she's going to get the details before everything goes crazy.

“I think there's definitely going to be a next time.”

When Tali's said this, Shepard isn't the only one who wears a very big smile and digs into another eclair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This whole bunch of chapters about Sidonis wasn't initially planned to be part of the story. I initially wanted to keep them very short and just hint at the events, but then I realised that I needed them, just like Garrus needs the loyalty mission in ME2 to make peace with his past. Without it, there'd be no way he'd even consider having a girlfriend with the kind of backstory I had in mind for him. Also, it was a good opportunity to test how Tali deals with these kind of things since she's not a soldier here.
> 
> Because some things are different here compared to the games, I want to give you a little more context on a few decisions:  
> First, because Garrus is from Cipritine here (a decision that has something to do with how me met Shepard, I won't say more about this because I might want to write this story someday) he obviously doesn't know Harkin, that accounts for some changes in their meeting.  
> Second, because 'Archangel' is a covert operation of the Cipritine Police Force here, I decided to make some changes on the whole background. I left out Eclipse and Blood Pack in the scenario here because I decided that I only needed one fraction to cooperate with Fade and Sidonis, and the Blue Suns seemed like the most logical option. I also decided to cut down Garrus' squad to six plus himself; for a shorter mission like this one it seemed a more realistic size to me; but I might be wrong there.  
> As a last and major change, Garrus doesn't have facial scarring due to the Archangel mission going south. I'm not a physician, so I don't know whether a normal human (without Turian face plating) would survive a blast to the face, and medical technology is not as advanced today as it is portrayed in the games. It seemed more "logical" to me to migrate any scarring away from his face, which doesn't mean that Garrus has no scars from that mission. On a less technical side, I think this also creates an interesting parallel to Shepard - both are unscarred on a first glance, 'whole' so to say, but both have scars hidden somewhere, both mentally and physically. I also like the idea that Garrus has to wear his own scars hidden under clothes a lot - because I think he'd rather have it they'd be easily visible. I can discuss why I think that in length, but maybe that goes beyond the scope of this section. Let me know if you're interested in a philosophical debate about Garrus' scars, though :)


	23. A Past and Future Problem - Recess (Garrus)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now for something completely different...

In his time as a cop, Garrus had to give the one or other statement in front of a court. It's nothing new to be in the witness box, give a neutral, detailed description of the events that led to the police taking someone into custody. It's been part of his job – surely an unexciting part – but also something he always considered necessary.

This time, however, can't even compare to all the trials he ever had to take part in.

It's the tenth day of the trial against Sidonis. The tenth time they meet in court, and Garrus needs all concentration and will to tell himself it's the right thing to do, that he hasn't let the others down by sparing the traitor. The tenth time his father is there, too; he's recently retired and probably doesn't have anything better to do. The tenth time Garrus has to drive to Cipritine in the morning and comes back in the evening, the tenth time etiquette (and Shepard) dictates it that he wears a suit.

The first time, he actually got a little nostalgic when the thought settled in that he couldn't wear a uniform to court any more. He's been unsure whether or not to wear any of the insignia her earned during his service – technically, Turians wear at least the most important ones even when not in uniform, then pinned to their formal wear. On the other hand, his departure from Cipritine after the Saren-Arterius-case wasn't entirely... clean. In the end though, he's decided to use a few of his insignia, the most important ones. He's still a Turian, even if he's not very good one at being one.

It's a short proceeding, relatively speaking. Turian trials never last very long anyway – it's the thing with the Turian honour, probably. They don't lie, and if they try, they don't do it very well. And as much as Garrus is rather split on the Turian police forces, they do thorough work. A trial is most often only a formality after all evidence has been meticulously collected and structured by the police. However, cases like this one – involving so many wounded parties, a case from years in the past; involving three witnesses from the Citadel (himself, Shepard and Sergeant Bailey; nobody asked about Tali, thankfully), it could have taken longer than it it. Of course, the days of trial spread over the course of a few weeks. But for the next session, at the end of the next week, the judge scheduled the final speeches, and in maybe a month, the whole affair would be over.

It's already clear how it would end – Sidonis already said in his own interrogation that he would plead guilty.

It would all end soon, and every time Garrus comes back to the Citadel, he doesn't quite know what to do with it. His father, for once, seems to approve of this course of action – not about Garrus now being a civilian at court and not a cop, of course. Commissioner Pallin was 'pleased' to hear of Sidonis' capture, which is about as enthusiastic as a marriage proposal coming from him. Garrus' mother only seems to be happy that he's unharmed and that the chapter of his past is finally over, a little like Shepard and strangely, Tali. And Solana, his elder sister, even went a step further and asked him if he's happy where he is now; that was on the day of trial where Shepard had to give her statements.

Garrus still struggles to figure out an answer several more days of trial later.

When he returns to the Citadel, it's already way past Shepard and his office hours. Still not dark outside and relatively warm, though; it's probably a good idea if he takes a run to get his mind off of the events of the day. An hour just for him, his earplugs and the music on his phone, and the little park down the street. He's probably not the funniest flatmate right now, anyway.

Upstairs in the flat, the TV is turned up so much that he can hear it even on the corridor. Whatever Shepard is doing, their downstairs neighbour, a cranky middle-aged man named Charles Pressly (as it so happens a military man, too; just currently not on a tour) is surely not amused. And as soon as he has the door open, Garrus isn't sure any more if _he_ should be amused, either.

“You can't be serious”, he just mumbles to himself as the recognises the sounds from the TV.

And, sure enough, there's a pair of shoes that doesn't belong to Shepard in the hallway. Tali is sitting on their sofa, too, in a position that can't be comfortable (legs folded and feet tugged under her behind, it looks a bit like yoga) and her eyes glued to the screen. Shepard sits next to her, halfway amused and periodically looking back and forth between Tali and the screen.

When she notices him taking off his suit jacket in the door frame, she stops the DVD player. “Welcome back home, dear!”, she says with a little grin and a voice that sounds too much like a housewife for his liking; obviously for dramatic effect. Tali only now takes notice of him and nods mutely. “Care for a movie?”

“I'd rather use the evening for a run, thanks”, he replies. “Jane.”

Shepard giggles into her hand, Tali just shakes her head.

At first after the thing with Sidonis, Garrus wasn't sure if Tali would change her behaviour towards Shepard and him, even partly feared that her involvement would affect Shepard's friendship with her. But he has to admit that Tali is remarkably resilient and deals with everything far calmer than he would have expected. With a little bit more care from all involved parties – including him – probably her helping Shepard out from time to time wouldn't end in a disaster, at least not right away.

But as much as Garrus has gotten used to Tali hanging around the office and meeting Shepard, he hasn't seen her in the flat often.

“Oh you're missing something”, Shepard says with a wink, and a little hint in her voice that tells him she isn't so sure about this movie, either. He totally gets that. “Anyway. Everything went well?”

“Yeah”, he drawls. “Heard another former colleague from SWAT today. Next Friday are the final speeches.”

“Want me to come with you?” He definitely treasures this, though; this casual way they can speak about things like that. And that Tali doesn't flinch, nor does she seem annoyed. She simply reads something on her phone while he and Shepard talk.

“Your choice”, he says to Shepard. “It's not the sentence yet, just an attorney talking a lot. No offence, Tali.”

Shala'Raan is an attorney, he shouldn't forget that. And as much as he and Tali have taken to sniping comments at each other in the last few weeks, he doesn't want to intentionally hurt her.

“None taken, for a change”, Tali says, looks up from her phone. “I've heard a few final speeches myself, they sometimes take a whole day.”

Garrus allows himself a sigh. “You know how to properly motivate someone”, he says dryly.

“You're welcome.”

“Anyway. Since you two seem to deal just fine without my presence”, he says and nods ominously towards the TV screen, “I'm going to take my leave and---”

He gets interrupted by the telephone ringing, it's the tone they've selected for the office number. Before he can react, Shepard is up on her feet with a quick: “I'm going!” and he's alone in the room with Tali, who still has her phone in hand and her eyes halfway down on the display.

Shepard rushes past him, towards the telephone on the hallway. He listens, too; but when he hears the name 'Mrs Giles', he quickly turns his attention back to Tali. Today is definitely not a day for one of Mrs Giles 'my husband is cheating on me'-escapades.

“So... 'Fleet and Flotilla', huh?”, he breaks the silence in the living room, steps a bit closer to the sofa.

“I'm surprised you know it”, Tali says tonelessly, her eyes moving just a little more away from her phone. Maybe he should simply let her read.

“I have an older sister”, he still returns. “And she loved that movie when we were teenagers.”

He still remembers watching it with her, at least trice. It's not the worst movie; at least it got the historical parts about the Turian fleet from back when they were still a seafaring nation right. As far as he can tell, the parts about the Quarian flotilla, the ships the Quarians used to sail and live on before they became land-bound nomads, are mostly correct, as well.

But it still is a romance movie about a Turian and a Quarian general in times of shaky peace. For Garrus tastes, at least back when he was a teenager, there's too much romance and too less firing cannons.

“At least someone in the family has taste, then”, Tali says dryly.

“Certainly”, he replies without missing a beat. “Still up to debate whether it's good taste, though.”

“Definitely not up to debate in your case“, Tali counters, not cracking even a hint of a smile. “You're a lost cause.“

He doesn't want to show either that it makes him grin a little bit. This form of snarking at each other is definitely more amusing than he cares to admit.

“Oh come on, Tali“, he replies. “I don't even fancy myself a movie-enthusiast, so you have to be a little more creative than that.“

“I never spoke about movies“, she just says, looks up to him and suddenly scrutinises his button-up shirt and suit jacket. “But your taste apparently exclusively consists of the same blue, drones and guns – which is about as interesting as watching a battery recharge.“

He definitely hasn't seen this coming, that's a point for her – there's even a second in which he doesn't know what to reply. Tali notices her intermediate victory, a ghost of a smirk moves over her face, before she goes back to her phone, seemingly ignoring him.

Garrus definitely wouldn't let her win this discussion so easily. “Is that so? You might change your mind when I admit that the soundtrack of ‘Fleet and Flotilla' isn't actually half-bad”, he says, decidedly casual. 

For a brief moment, Tali's eyes twitch, lighten up though still focussed on her phone. She shakes it off quickly. “Anyone could claim that”, she says. “But I bet you don't even know the title of---”

But their little ‘battle' is interrupted when Shepard comes back to the living room. “Damn, we need to do something about Mrs. Giles”, she says rather loudly. “I don't think her husband could even legitimately cheat on her half as often as she suspects him of it.”

“May I remind you that it was your idea that we take every client possible?”, Garrus answers as Shepard stalks past him and flops down on the sofa next to Tali. “To build reputation?”

“You don't have to deal with her”, Shepard grumbles. 

“No, I don't.” And Spirits, is he thankful for that.

He leaves the living room shortly after, and soon, the flat is filled again with the sound of ‘Fleet and Flotilla's soundtrack. He can still hear it against the shower, Pressly is going to hate them.

He meets Shepard again in the hall as he's just about to leave, she holds him back shortly to explain that she just invited Tali around because the latter is writing the final bits of her Master's thesis and seemed to have needed something to get her mind off of University.

He goes running after that, the music player on his phone on shuffle for a change. At some point, the soundtrack of ‘Fleet and Flotilla' pops up – he would never admit to Tali out loud that he has stored it on his phone, though.

But he can at least answer the last comment she made before he left.

_Garrus: The soundtrack's best song is ‘Fire in the Courtyard'. You're welcome._

_Tali: Showoff._


	24. A Past and Future Probllem - Final Sprint (Tali)

“Apart from a few smaller errors, I could not find many issues, Tali”, says Liara, hands her a thick stapler over the table that has certain similarities with a paper-coloured brick wrapped in colourful plastic. “Of course, my studies in linguistics focussed on classical languages and the ancient Prothean, and not the use of modern languages in the context of technological reports. My assessment might not be fully accurate.”

“More accurate than mine, anyway”, Tali replies, eagerly flies through the pages of Liara's correction of her thesis. “Thanks, I really appreciate this.”  
“I'm glad I could help.”   
After Shepard acquainted her with Liara T'Soni, Tali had the one or other opportunity to talk to her. They now greet each other on the hallways, too; and after a few weeks and a few more friendly conversations, Tali's taken heart and asked Liara to proofread the alpha-version of her master thesis. 

They've met in one of the University's cafeterias over lunch just two days later, and from what Tali can see while quickly skimming through the manuscript, it seems that Liara was thorough. Every little correction has an explanation in a clean, tidy handwriting.

“If you allow me, I think your weak spot is punctuation, especially commas. It's nothing drastic, but I think I noticed a certain pattern there”, Liara says in her calm voice while Tali is still looking over the comments.

It occurs to her that she's being impolite; they have their lunch still in front of them and she should focus on Liara, at least until the lunch is done. But it's itching under her fingers to make those corrections. 

“I'm sorry”, Tali starts, closes the stapler forcefully and yanks her eyes towards Liara. “You said … punctuation. Yeah. Sam noticed a few weaknesses there, too. Something with relative clauses.”

“That is correct, yes”, Liara gives back. She doesn't seem deterred by Tali initially preferring her notes over her company the slightest. She also waited for Tali with her own lunch. “I've made a few comments on the grammar rules. I can explain them if you wish.”

“That's kind of you, thanks. But I think I'll skip the lesson for now and come back to it later, it that's okay for you. I only have ten days left, and still so many corrections to make, and pictures to plot, and then I need to print it and... but who am I telling this to.”

“Well, my doctoral thesis did not have a deadline”, Liara admits. “And I didn't have any proofreaders.”

“You didn't?”, Tali asks.

“No. Well... I was seventeen and nobody expected a thesis from me anyway. I spent... a lot of time alone, back then.”

A trace of sadness mixes into Liara's usually even voice. Back then, her mother must still have been alive from what Tali knows from Shepard, and if Liara says about herself that she used to be alone it's a gloomy thought.

“For what it's worth, if you need a beta for your second thesis, just tell me about it. I owe you one.”

“Thank you”, Liara says, and Tali is glad to hear the tinge of sadness leaving. 

“I mean I can probably not help much, but... I can write some software that tracks your citations and checks the original papers for correctness.”

It's just a spontaneous idea, but suddenly, Liara is all ears. “You can do that?”

“It should be simple.”

“But so useful! Is it possible for documents that I have scanned, too?”

The discussion quickly escalates from there, from the use of artificial intelligences for word detection to automated translating software. Afterwards, Tali gets the feeling that Liara seriously thinks of studying Computer Science after her second doctoral degree, just because of the enthusiasm she develops over the course of one simple lunch, and the curiosity with which she asks questions.

They return to Tali's own thesis over dessert, though.

“Am I understanding this correctly, you've asked several people for their opinion on your thesis?”, Liara asks, she seems genuinely interested.

“My friends Sam from Communication Science and Gabby and Ken from Engineering. My aunt, she's a lawyer, just to be sure; and Shepard actually sent it to a military contact of hers, a scientist and specialist for artificial intelligences. I haven't met her in person, though, and I'm still waiting for her reply.”

And when Tali lists all these people, it seems like a lot to her. 

A sentiment Liara obviously shares. “Are this many proofreaders considered normal?”

“For my first thesis, I only asked my father. Friends of mine had one or two proofreaders, but...”

“... it's different this time?”

Tali thinks about this question even as Liara has already said goodbye. 

Is it different now from how it has been two and a half years ago?

Her father isn't there, of course. And still, she feels like he is – Professor Xen is a friend of his, the new owner of his company; Tali knows her almost as long as she knows auntie Raan. But in contrast to Shala'Raan – who isn't her actual aunt but a friend of her mothers – Daro'Xen doesn't feel like family. More like a teacher she needs to proof herself in front of; again, and again, and again.

And still, it's what she always wanted – a place in her father's research, in his company. That's why she studied Engineering, why she aimed at Computer Science as a second degree. Why she works with Professor Xen, because her field of study – artificial intelligences – is exactly what her father's company used to work on. 

And now, Professor Xen has hinted; no, even outright stated, that should Tali hand in an excellent thesis, she could become part of her company, and maybe even get the possibility to study in the doctoral programme of the Computer Science department. Earn money and still write a doctoral thesis, stand on her own feet after living off what little her father has left her and off her aunt's generosity and still realise her dream. She would also work for an all-Quarian company, and her work there would, without a doubt, help their immediate goal to become even less dependent on their host towns, and later, regain their home country.

She's there, just one step away from what she always wanted to do since she was a little girl. Of course, in her dream, her father was still alive. And so was her mother.

And of course, without having been part of the workgroup of Professor Adams, who works in Power Engineering; without having worked with Gabby and Ken for a few months, without this little, little detail in the back of her mind. That little detail that Professor Adams offered her a full position, too. And the possibility to go abroad to a friend of his in Sweden for half a year.

People sometimes fear the decision between the devil and the deep blue sea – Tali felt like the decision she had to make soon is just equally as hard, just that both options are huge honours, possibilities and more than she would have expected when she moved to the Citadel.

It doesn't make the decision any easier, though.


	25. A Past and Future Problem - Gold and Platinum (Tali)

Black on white the job offer is even more frightening.

_Dear Ms. Zorah,_

_with respect to your excellent credentials, we are pleased to offer you a position as Junior Research Assistant at GethSolutions Inc., starting Decembre 1, 2017._

_As agreed upon in your job interview we will take into consideration your participation in the Citadel University's doctoral programme. We enclose a preliminary version of your contract on approval._

_We await your decision by November 13._

_Sincerely,_

_Daro'Xen vas Moreh_

_CEO of GethSolutions Inc._

It's lying on her desk now, on a neat and expensive looking piece of paper with a silvery logo that Tali knows so well, next to an open envelope and a printed out e-mail.

_Tali,_

_I've spoken to my friend in Lund. He's looked at your thesis and parts of the paper you and Gabby are writing, and he says he can't wait to talk to you. I thought of arranging a call? But things are looking really good._

_I think we can have everything settled in a few weeks, and I'd guess you'd be off by next year then, depending on bureaucracy. I'd extend your contract until then, of course._

_Tell me when it's a good time for a call to Sweden and I'll arrange it._

_Best,_

_Greg Adams_

It doesn't fit. No matter how she twists and turns it and thinks about it, it doesn't fit.

November 13 is in three days, and she hasn't talked to Professor Adams' friend yet. And how can she decide if she doesn't know her options fully? And even if they talk, there's no way she'll get an all-clear on the position in Sweden in that short amount of time.

It shouldn't even matter, because she should've already made her decision by now. She's known that this situation hasn't been unlikely, the situation that she can choose between her dream job and another dream option, she's known this ever since her thesis got an A+ and even before.

But now, it's there, black on white and irreversible – there it is, the decision that is so hard even if it shouldn't be.

“Professor Xen took you? That is great! You've called her back already, haven't you?”, said Sam as Tali told her about this. They've been in the cafeteria, met over lunch and Sam got really excited. Tali felt a little disheartened that she didn't feel as enthusiastic back then.

And now, Tali looks at her phone as she stares onto the confirmation that everything she's ever dreamed of is just a call and a signature away from her. Sam is right, of course. There's no real reason to think about this – a job and a position in the doctoral programme, that's the jackpot. 

But still, ever since the letter arrived two days ago, Tali hasn't been able to make that phone call. Everything she did was make an appointment for that call to Lund, talk to Sam, talk to Gabby, and a few others.

“Oh that's … unpleasant”, said Gabby as Tali explained her situation to her. “I mean, that you've got to make that yes or no decision with that friend of your dad before even talking to Professor Adams' friend. You sure Professor Xen won't delay the deadline by a few days?”

No, of course she wouldn't. Because as excellent as Tali is, there are more excellent people out there. Tali knows of at least handful of other young Quarians her age with similarly excellent credentials, and they wouldn't wait with a reply as long as she does. She explained that to Gabby, of course. And Gabby really did make an effort to be as professional as possible about it, as neutral as she should as a friend – but also as a friend, Tali knew how much Gabby'd miss sharing a desk with her. Tali'd miss it, too.

But Professor Xen just is the best. The best of the best. Platinum standard. The most brilliant mind of her generation, as auntie Raan had once called her. And she's Rael'Zorah's friend and business partner, so this chance is more than just a simple job offer. Tali can't refuse, not for any logical reason.

Well, maybe because Daro'Xen vas Moreh has the reputation of being... a little eccentric. Veetor doesn't like her at all, she's too forceful, too sharp for his taste. Also, too quick sometimes. For Tali's sake Veetor gulped down his dislike of Daro'Xen when Tali told him of her job offer, but the way he immediately started fidgeting with another Rubik's cube told her everything about his feelings.

It's not as if Tali and Daro'Xen always see eye-to-eye. Not that they had a confrontation in the past, either; but Tali does have a few opinions, a few scientific views that Daro'Xen does not share. 

But what does it matter if she likes her future boss personally? They only work together, not live together. Tali can still see Gabby and Ken and Sam and all her other friends, even if she works for GethSolutions, Inc. As a member of the doctoral programme, she'd also attend a few meetings where Liara might be present, and the perspective of that seemed to have made Liara quite enthusiastic. 

When she's honest with herself, her friends aren't really helping, even if they're well-meaning with their congratulations and enthusiasm and even with their concerns. And Tali knows it's not their fault – there's more to her situation, more issues that she tried to speak of but... she just couldn't find the right words. It's not easy to explain to people who've only known her for two and a half years, tops.

It's lunch break on a Friday, and from the 45 minutes that it usually takes the work group to go to the cafeteria together (Tali excused herself today) she already stared 40 onto the two pieces of paper and hasn't made even one single step of progress. 

It's so easy, actually. Just a phone call, and telling Professor Adams that she's sorry. He'd understand, of course, he always knew that Tali tried to be several things at once. But even though she's had her phone in hand about ten times in the last 40 minutes, she hasn't made a single call.

But what's the use of waiting and waiting and thinking and thinking if she can't bring herself to decide differently, anyway?

She takes her phone into her hand another time, wants to end this mental running of the gauntlet. But before she can dial, someone calls her.

“Shepard?... You bought a drone and it's... No, don't panic, I can probably fix it. … In the office? Sure, I'll come meet you after work. … Yes. Bye.”

When she ends the call, she hears the voices of the people who are still her colleagues and hides the letters under a college block. 

November 15 is on Monday. And Professor Xen works on Saturday, too. 

Tali can still make that call tomorrow.


	26. A Past and Future Problem - A Drone in the Snow (Garrus)

5:51 pm.

Nine minutes to go until he can lock the doors. Good. Closed doors mean less clients.

One could assume – should assume, in fact – that he should welcome clients, because clients mean jobs and jobs mean money and so on. One could even assume that he wouldn't be so averse to actually talking to clients anymore, now that normalcy has entered his day-to-day-life again.

After all, Sidonis received a life-long sentence a few weeks ago. And for what it's worth, Garrus is doing fine at the moment; wounds turned into scars again and they feel more solid this time around.

But, alas, talking to clients has never been Garrus' forte. It's one of the few things he misses about being a cop – talking to people as a cop hardly ever included subtle advertisement for his job and could usually be limited to facts and a mild degree of sympathy. He can do that. Subtle propaganda about their skills as investigators? Not so much. He's the one for the cold, hard facts; Shepard's the one for talking – the trusty good cop, bad cop scenario transferred to 'good PI interested in your well-being (and totally not your money)' and 'bad PI, not interested in you, just in getting things done'. It's a good model that involves no playing pretend from either part.

When he's alone in the office, though, and a client comes, he usually has to pretend to be able to play both parts. And claiming he's good at it would be an overstatement. But closing the doors is out of question, they only ever do that in emergencies.

So he's stuck with watching the agency, and still counts the minutes down until he office hours allow him to lock the doors and do his research in peace.

He feels a little silly because of it, of course.

5:55 pm.

There's a slightly damaged surveillance drone in the backroom of the agency that needs his attention more than the current light research he does, and in five minutes, he's finally free to give it his undivided attention. Nothing compares to getting his hands a little dirty after a day of observations and being alone in the office.

5:56 pm.

Winter is extremely early this year, it's only mid of November and the once peaceful falling snow outside slowly turns into a storm, if the snapping umbrellas of the people outside is any indicator. But nobody in their right minds leaves their home in such a weather just to see a PI shortly before closing time. Good.

5:57 pm.

So their target _has_ known that bartender. Beginner's mistake to believe old photographs from high school would never appear on the internet, or that twenty years are enough to make a person unrecognisable. That piece of information will definitely come in handy at some point.

5:59 pm.

One minute, wonderful. Also, their targets hadn't only been classmates, no. They'd been on the chess team together. So much for the notion that only clever people play chess. A clever person wouldn't have lied in the faces of two PIs if evidence against their lie is so easy to come by.

Just a few seconds now.

He takes his key chain out of his pockets on the way to the door, feeling just a bit satisfied.

But then, someone rings the doorbell.

And there goes his chance of tinkering with the drone. The key wanders back into his pockets, he allows himself a small sigh, but goes back to his desk.

Very much to his elation, though, no spurned lover or spouse with tear-strained eyes hidden behind a big pair of sunglasses (always prepare for the worst) enters the room, but a very snowbound Tali.

“Looks like I can consider myself fortunate that I didn't get the night shift outside”, he says as a greeting, cracking a little smirk at the way Tali rolls her eyes at him.

She's been here so often that she doesn't need an invitation from his side to get rid of her hood and the woollen scarf around her neck without paying his words much mind. “Does that mean Shepard has the night shift?”, she says instead. When he nods, she lets out a sigh. “Observation?”

Her attempts at getting rid of her jacket cease. “Yes. She relieved me two hours ago, we're currently onto something with a client. What about you, though, what brings you here?”

“Actually, I thought you two needed help”, Tali replies, brows furrowing. “Shepard asked me to come here when I have the time, I told her it would be in the evening because of my work. She said something about a drone having crash-landed in a bush?”

That actually explains a lot. “More 'crashed against a tree'”, he says, gets up from his desk again and nods towards the backroom. “And that on her maiden flight.”

He hears Tali chuckle. “Let me guess: Shepard's infamous technical skills?”

“I'm sure it's no coincidence that her flying skills are about as good as her infamous driving skills, too”, he replies. When Tali's gotten ridden of her jacket, he gestures her to where the drone is currently resting and goes to lock the agency doors. “And I lend her my car today because hers is only getting snow tires now. Risky.”

“A little late, isn't it?”, Tali said. “But then again, winter is early this year.”

He finds her with the arms of her pullover rolled up squatting next to the drone when he comes back. “I had a quick look, not much damage from what I saw. The electronics are mostly intact, but I think I have to order a few replacement parts.”

“How did this even happen?” Tali's currently inspecting the broken rotor blades on the left side of the drone.

He squats down on the other side, rolling his sleeves up, too. “I don't know. I was on my observation shift, Shepard wanted a test flight. Next thing I know is that I get a call at lunchtime telling me not to get angry. She didn't mention she called you, too, though.”

“In my lunch break, actually.”

It's amusing that Shepard panics over a crashed drone and calls their resident tech expert instead of simply waiting for him to have a look. Maybe he does hold some authority, after all. “That explains why she said that she 'has already solved the situation'.”

“The bracket for the camera is broken, too. Just where did she test out the drone?”

“I have no idea”, he admits. “But I just wanted to get to work fixing this thing. I keep spare parts just in case.”

Tali snorts lightly. “Seems like a good decision to me. So if you need help...” Her voice trails off a bit, and she looks back up from the drone to him. “... I mean, do you want to fix this on your own, or should I...?”

There it is again, that odd look in her eyes. It has appeared... he doesn't even recall when exactly, but it must have been a few weeks ago. It unsettles him. It's so careful, somehow, a bit guarded. He sometimes wonders if their usual casual sniping at each other has started to irritate her; which would be a pity, and doesn't quite make sense to him. He's taken it that they both enjoy getting on each other's nerves from time to time.

But far be it from him to make her uncomfortable.

“I'm only sensitive when other people get their hands on my weapons, not on that drone, so you're welcome”, he says, in what he hopes is an easy tone. “Let me just get the tools and spare parts.”

They work in companionable silence for a while then; Tali fixing the minor damages the electronics have taken and resetting the software while he goes through his collection of spare parts in search for a replacement for the broken rotor. Considering this is their first drone, though, he doesn't expect any miracle apart from the trusty old duct tape.

All in all, Shepard has caused less damage than he and Tali have expected. If not for the rotor, the drone might even still be able to fly. According to Tali, the Wi-Fi module has seen better days and the remote control unit for the camera doesn't work any more, but it's nothing that she can't fix.

In the end, it doesn't even take them half an hour to take stock of all damages, repair what they can and set up an order for new rotor blades.

On Shepard's account, of course, which Garrus finds deviously satisfying. “You know, I always wanted this drone to be silver, not that strange... what is it...? Eggshell? How do you even call that colour. Maybe I should just order paint, too, there sure are a few scratches here and there...”

“You're not going to let her live that down, are you?” For a moment, he's startled at his own elation when he hears Tali's amusement. He quickly discards it as 'successfully broke the silence'.

She's standing at the office window, staring outside into the snow storm that seems to have gotten even more severe. Then, she takes out her phone, types something. She does that often lately. He goes back to considering the silver paint.

“Shit.”

“Hm?”

“There was an accident at the Tiberius Towers, a trolley broke down in the middle of the crossroads down to Silversun Strip. There's no public transportation downtown at the moment, the maintenance crew has problems getting through in the storm.”

Tali's probably the only person who prefers public transportation to owning a car. “That's the problem with the early winter, I guess. Nobody saw it coming.”

“I don't really want to walk back home to the Embassies. And there's probably traffic jam, too; and I don't want to spend hours in a cab, either.” With a disappointed huff, she goes back into the room, towards the leather sofa where their clients usually sit, and falls down on it.

He looks up from his indulgence in paints (metallic blue, even better than silver). “I'd offer you a lift, but you know. Shepard has my car.” Which reminds him that the weather situation hopefully clears until his next shift, but he still has nine and a half hours until then.

“No problem”, says Tali. She searches for his eyes, and there's a bit of that odd look again, but even more subdued than what has become usual. “But if I could stay here until the buses are going again, that'd be good.”

“Sure, but let's move up to the flat. Otherwise someone stops by and gets the wrong idea about me working overtime.”

A chuckle moves over Tali's face. “Heaven forbid.”


	27. A Past and Future Problem - Pancakes for Two (Tali)

Now that she thinks about it, she's never spend much time in Shepard's and Garrus' shared flat, apart from a few occasions. And she's only ever been to the living room and the kitchen. The bedrooms of Shepard and Garrus are on the complete other end of the flat, and Garrus only gestures her into the living room before he vanishes into his.

It's been a long day at work, and she actually yearns for the comfort of her own room, for a bit of respite to think her impeding decision through. But then again, at least Shepard's flat is heated and she doesn't have to spend time in the snowstorm. It's a small victory.

Shortly after, Garrus comes back to the living room, sits down on the single armchair that belongs to the sofa. He's brought a tablet computer. “Mind if I work on that case a bit more?”

“Not at all.”

That's a good excuse for her to do the same and finish the review of the paper she's started at work. Sam's come across it, and send it her way in preparation of her position at GethSolutions, Inc.

Minutes pass with both of them absorbed in their respective activities.

“Oh, I never offered you something to drink, sorry.”

“No problem, I'm good.”

“Tell me if you need anything.”

“Of course.”

And Sam has been absolutely right in her quick assessment of the work presented in that particular paper. It could proof groundbreaking on the field of artificial intelligences. Professor Xen surely already knows about it, but it won't hurt if Tali would mention it casually in the talk they are probably having next week. That would leave a good impression.

Of course, only if she would start working there.

But part of her thinks it's not 'if' but 'when' and another protests at the thought, there's still the call to Sweden and the months abroad.

She shouldn't consider Sweden an option and still she does, still it's tempting to think of spending six months with a leading expert on power engineering working on that battery-project she's recently started with Gabby. And then afterwards, with a bit of luck, maybe Professor Adams would hire her again, and she could work with Gabby and Ken again on a similar project. It's been so much fun, hardly work at all, over the last years.

But what meant 'with a little bit of luck' when she could have certainty with just one phone call and a signature? She has the chance to finish what her father started. It's too good a chance to pass up, in theory.

In practise, though, she develops a headache every time she tries to think about it logically. This time is no different, and when she reaches the paper's appendix, her focus is completely gone and her thoughts rotate around her different job possibilities once more.

Just to get her head off of things, she deactivates her tablet's screen for the time being and looks up into the room.

It's completely quiet, there's not even a clock ticking. Garrus doesn't seem to take note of her. He's focussing on his own tablet, eyes flying back and forth, his long fingers typing from time to time, too. It's oddly calming to see him work, and that considering he usually drives her mad in one way or the other.

It's still strange to be here, in a sense. She doesn't usually spent time with Garrus other than together with Shepard or helping the PIs on a case. Also, there's still his offer to ask about _Archangel_ hanging between them – she never asked about anything, they never even spoke about it again. Instead, they settled into a sort of odd routine since they're both friends of Shepard's, and Tali's been way too occupied with her thesis to ponder on anything connected to the story with Sidonis, mostly. Though, if she has to be honest, something about him did change after the trial in Cipritine found an end, he asks less insensitive questions these days. And thinking about it, he hasn't driven her mad in at least a few months, only irritated her mildly. She also prefers his snarkiness to cold politeness any time.

If he'd know she actually wastes thoughts on him that wouldn't be good for his ego, though. He'd reply something smug with a tiny twitching of his eyebrows to indicate he's being sarcastic. The mental picture makes her chuckle, which in turn reminds her that he probably still recognises the noise because he's always annoyingly attentive.

It's best she turned back to her tablet. Maybe she should put on the headphones and watch something, she's stored a few films on the tablet, just in case. But wouldn't that be impolite?

Before she can consider this further, though, Garrus' phone rings and provides distraction. Apparently, it's Shepard.

“Oh, that's what I call good news”, Garrus says into his phone, a small grin moving over his face. “You saw the files I send you?--- Yes, with that, we should have everything we need.”

Tali could swear she hears Shepard actually breaking into a small jubilation on the other end, what Garrus acknowledged with a smirk. “Not just for you, for both of us. I imagine it's no real fun out there right now.” His eyes move to the window, and he frowns. “Yes, I hear it's pretty chaotic. Tali said there was an accident on Silversun Strip. --- Yes, she's still here. --- No, not because of the drone. We actually fixed it, Shepard, as good as possible. Though it could stand a new paint job. I thought about silver?”

Tali has to giggle lightly into her hand, and Garrus actually laughs shortly. He does that so rarely that it startles her to hear it. “Forget about it, Shepard. Just don't ruin my car. --- Yes, see you later.”

Then, he hangs up. “Good news?”

“She just got the evidence we've been trailing our target for since two days. I've been digging up some other stuff online, means – case closed, and no observation shift tomorrow. That one wasn't fun.”

She knows him at least well enough to guess what it's been about. “Something domestic? Adultery?”

“The occasional well-paying wife with a husband with wandering hands, yes. Shepard still thinks those are good to built reputation”, he says with a sigh. “You could think that after nearly a year, we'd have enough of that.” Then, he looks again at his tablet, deactivats the screen as well and gets up. “I don't know about you, but I'm hungry. I think I'm going to raid the fridge. You want something, too?”

A few minutes later, the decision of what to eat has fallen on pancakes. Tali even offered to make them herself, she isn't sure she trusts Garrus' cooking skills over her own. At least, she can be sure that no dairy accidentally finds its way into the food though, there's always soy milk in a half-Turian household.

While she busies herself preparing the batter, he shows actual foresight and heats up the pan, and then produces two bottles of beer from the fridge.

“There's soda, too, but beer's... somewhat more classy after work”, he says when he puts a bottle on the counter next to her. “Plus it's Friday.”

“Beer goes especially well together with pancakes”, she replies dryly. She opens the bottle nonetheless. “A total classic.”

Beer's nearly okay with her, a lot of her friends of university drink it on their movie evenings or nights out, Gabby and especially Ken included. Tali will probably never get used to the bitter aftertaste, though.

“Sorry, we're out of claret and champagne.” Next to the foresight involving the frying pan, Garrus actually has enough decency to stay close to her and the stove, probably to appear as if he's at least mentally taking part in the cooking.

“You don't happen to have a good vodka?”, she says lightly while beating eggs.

“Oh? The hard stuff? And here I was, thinking you're a lightweight.”

“Wrex hands out a few shots after each training session, you know.” He doesn't have to know that Wrex' generosity with vodka has lead to her getting rather intoxicated with Grunt on at least one occasion, though.

“Combining shotgun and stomach training, sounds like Wrex”, he says, chuckles a little. “Unfortunately, I'm not a vodka person if given a choice. I can offer brandy from Cipritine, but be warned. That stuff burns.”

She looks up to see his expression; it's hard sometimes to figure out if he's being serious or not. The transition between teasing and honest offers is somewhat fluid with him. He leans against the fridge, face neutral, only lightly smirking. So – serious, maybe?

“I think I'll stick to the beer for now, but thanks”, she replies, making it sound very non-committal, too.

“Sure, let me know if you change you mind. Let it not be said I'm a bad host.”


	28. A Past and Future Problem - The Art of Conversation (Garrus)

Garrus doesn't think of himself as a good conversationalist. Certainly not for a lack of trying – he likes conversations – it's just that he isn't very good at small talk. He simply doesn't see any use in talking about the weather when he could be talking about something more important. More often than not, that doesn't agree with other people, though. The last time he tried to talk to Tali about something he thought interesting – the history of her people following their time as sea-faring nomads and and her multiple allergies – she's threatened him with one of Grunt's shotguns next time they met at the Krogan shooting range. And with Wrex as a teacher, that's a risk he doesn't want to take.

Talking about food and its quality usually isn't his greatest passion, either. The pancakes are good, he told her that much; but just like every time before that, the blooming conversation between him and Tali has amounted to only a few sentences, followed by silence.

She used to be so... bubbly, when he and Shepard first met her, so enthusiastic. She still is, around Shepard, at least. Around him, not so much; but then again, they are still getting to know each other. Which is a bit of a shame, considering it's November and they first met in March.

Shepard recently told him that Tali is getting a promotion, for example; and he's had to wonder if she already finished her thesis.

If they'd talk about something professional, that's probably not a land-mine-topic, though. “So... I heard congratulations are in order?”, he says casually, a bit into his third pancake. “You're getting a promotion?”

When she lets out a short, but definitely agitated sigh, and puts the cutlery away while there's still pancake on her plate, he isn't so sure any more.

He should consider a career as a professional mine-finder.

“It's not really a promotion”, she says, sounds relatively even. Maybe it's just a little spring trap. “But I am offered a research position in a prestigious company, yes.”

“That's still a reason to celebrate, I think?”

Tali sways her head in a gesture vaguely reminiscent of a nod. “I could even apply for the PhD programme of the university, my future boss is a professor there and would support it and adjust the contract accordingly.”

Back from his own days at college, Garrus knows quite a few people for who would have seen an offer like that as the chance of a lifetime. Considering that, Tali doesn't sound too enthusiastic; the guarded expression is back in her eyes, too.

“What kind of research are we talking about here? If you don't mind me asking, of course.”

“No, it's okay.” A vague chuckle ghosts over Tali's face, but it doesn't last. “Professor Xen is one of the leading experts on virtual intelligences. She is currently working on semi-autonomous platforms that could perform mildly advanced tasks, like serving as harvest hands on the farms surrounding the Tonbay and Moreh quarters.”

“So not a simple information VI like the one they've started using in the supermarkets, this... uhm, Avina?”

“No, actual robotic platforms performing actual physical labour.”

“That sounds pretty fascinating. I mean, I've read that the progress on that sector is taking rapid steps, but to think that robots could perform farm work in the not-so-distant future is certainly something else than airport face recognition.”

But Tali doesn't seem to share his enthusiasm and takes a long, deep breath. Then, as if suddenly remembering that they are still eating, she shifts her attention back to the remnants of her pancake.

A minute or so passes with only the sounds of cutlery as company, and Tali makes no attempts of replying anything. And another hopeful young conversation dies and he doesn't really get why. Time to take another step on the mine field, not that he's looking forward to actually triggering it.

“Correct me if I'm wrong, but you don't seem terribly happy about this.”

Her eyes dart up to him, the fork with a piece of pancake on it stopps half of the way up to her mouth. And he can't help the feeling that he's being intensely scrutinised right now, caught in the explosion of an actual landmine.

_Good job, Garrus._

It takes a few seconds before her expression softens again, and the fork returns to the plate. “I'm... honestly, I don't know if I am”, she mutters.

Then, realising what she's just said, she sighs deeply once more, falls back into the backrest of the sofa, shifts to find a comfortable position. He decides to keep silent for a moment. He's probably in no position to ask further, and she does seem a little caught off guard and a little like she never wanted to say what she just let slip.

He looks at her, she stares at the hem of her pullover, retracting her hands into her sleeves as if she's freezing. Then she looks up so suddenly even he didn't see it coming, and he thinks to see a decision forming behind her eyes. He's never noticed before that they're grey.

“You know...”, she then says, looks as if she's preparing herself to explain more. “I've had a few possibilities after I graduated in September”

September... has it really been two months since then? They don't know each other very well, it's very clear to him in that moment. It's not an uncommon feeling to him, that casual anonymity of knowing and not really knowing someone. But somehow, it... feels wrong with her right now.

“Next to the job with Professor Xen, my current boss, Professor Adams, offered me the chance to go abroad for six months to work with in a collaboration project on alternative energy sources for future vehicles with colleagues of his in Sweden.”

“Oh, you're... much asked for, these days.”

“Seems like it”, she mumbles. The way she looks at her knees now, crumpling the hems of her sleeves now from the inside, balling them into her fists – she isn't very happy about this, either.

And he thinks he begins to understand.

“Hard to decide?”

“I don't know.” Instead of looking at her knees, she focusses her eyes back on his own now. “It shouldn't even be a decision”, she says dismissively.

Or maybe, he _doesn't_ start to understand. “How so?”

She hesitates, looks away; but she doesn't seem to realise how nervous she appears. “It's... it wouldn't interest you, anyway.”

It's a bit as if she doesn't know what to do with him. Letting that sink in hurts, surprisingly.

“Go ahead and try.” By that time, he's forgotten about his own pancake, too.

She scrutinises him again, even more intensely this time. Then, she sighs as if defeated. “You know that my father... he died, about a year and a half ago”, she says carefully.

He thinks it most appropriate to respond with a single nod; he knows about it, but only because Shepard once told him.

“He used to be a researcher, too. He actually worked with Daro'Xen, they had a small company together. So getting the chance to start where he stopped...”, her voice trails off there, but now, he's sure he understands. “... I shouldn't even be considering going to Sweden.”

“But I guess you still do, huh?”, he says quietly. She doesn't nod, but the way she looks at him, somewhat torn, tells him all he needs to know. “I think I get where that's coming from.”

He hears his own father's voice in the back of his mind, _'You are not considering this scholarship, Garrus, are you?'_

“You know... all my life, I always thought that one day, I'd be just like my father. But now that it's all just an arm's length away...”, Tali says.

_'I thought you wanted to become a policeman.'_

“You don't know if it's what you want, or what he would have wanted.”

A little bit to his surprise, though, Tali shakes her head softly. “No, not really. My father... he was always working a lot, even more so after my mother died. I thought... if I'd follow in his footsteps, I'd be able to... uh, this sounds stupid, even in my head.”

He doesn't dare to intervene. This is really personal, and he's at least enough of a conversationalist to respect that. And Tali's thoughts, while not completely mirroring his own, at the very least resonate with issues he always _says_ are actually non-issues for him. His father, his messed-up first attempt at a job, too many things said too often, and too many things never even spoken about.

Of course, just because Garrus usually avoids these issues, it doesn't mean they aren't there.

When Tali carries on, she sounds almost dismissive of her own thoughts again. “I thought I'd be able to get closer to him. Or his memory, at least.”

A vague image of Solana saying he and his father would appreciate each other more if they'd actually work together flashes up in his mind. He's been there, too. And his response to Tali leaves his lips faster than it should. “That hardly ever works.”

“I know”, she replies forcefully. A spark of anger appears in her eyes, regret even.

He has to say something, quickly. He hasn't intended to make her angry, let alone to hurt her. His own daddy issues aren't even the point here. “No that's not... that was insensitive. I'm sorry.”

The anger vanishes as quickly as it came, replaced by astonishment. If he wants to or not, he has to explain now. Might as well, a story for a story – he's at least learned something from Shepard. “I have a father, too, you know. Used to work for the police, he retired a few months ago. Always wanted me to become just like him. Thing is, if your father is Deputy Chief in your home town, has a spotless service record, and the Admiral of the State Military is a common guest at your family dinner, turns out you've got a lot to measure up to. So it's just... I have a few experiences with expectations of my own.”

“I wouldn't call it expectations in my case”, Tali replies. It leaves a strangely pleasant feeling within him that she sounds less insecure. “My father never directly told me to follow in his footsteps. So... it was always my decision.”

“Well... they're still expectations, even if they're your own.”


	29. A Past and Future Problem - Turian Brandy (Tali)

For a moment, he's left her indeed speechless.

She hasn't expected someone – much less Garrus, of all people – to be able to find that particular mental pressure point so easily. And blunt as he is he just leaves her confronted with the one thing that makes everything so much more complicated: having it spelled out in front of her that at the bottom of it, it's her and her expectations that cause a large part of her headaches. At least make them more severe than they probably need to be.

Which she knew, of course. Deep down. She's been with herself for the last twenty-four years and she knows of her own standards, her own expectations and how adamant she is when she follows a goal. But hearing it from someone else is... different.

“I'm sorry if that was too forward”, Garrus says, surprises her once more. He sounds almost careful, looks at her with far less intensity in his eyes than normally.

“No, no. It's okay, you're... you're actually right”, she replies quickly, tasting her own astonishment at these words on her tongue. “I think my problem... does have a lot to do with my own expectations.”

She's had reservations about this, about telling him more about her problem. How could she not; they get along most of the time now when she's being honest, but it's not as if they're friends and they don't always see eye to eye. But now, she feels her reservations melting as the seconds creeping by for once make a situation easier. “I thought to have everything planned out, you know. Study. Engineering, of course, then Computer Science at a different university. PhD next, and later join my father's company. Even after he died, I still wanted this. But now...”

Sometimes, finding the right words for all the different things inside her head that seem to happen all at once. And when she finds them, they appear stupid to her. “It's...”, she starts, but hesitates again. Her eyes wander over to Garrus, anticipating to find something that would make her stop talking. A stony face, a cold glance or him rolling his eyes.

But she doesn't. And he's pretty much Shepard's best friend, so all bluntness aside, he must at least be a decent man. “It's a bit scary when you suddenly look left and right and find that there's more apart from that one way.”

A mirthless smirk moves over Garrus' face. “Tell me about it”, he mutters. “It's just as scary if you always knew that there was more but always discarded it. It's always a leap of faith to leave the beaten track.”

Thinking about it, she's never tried to figure out why he left his own beaten track as a police officer. Frustration with the job, as far as Shepard is to be believed, and it probably has something to do with this Sidonis. Right now, though, it seems like something familiar.

“Well... correct me if I'm wrong”, she says, mirrors the tone with which he said the same thing to her a few minutes ago. It isn't lost on him, he breathes out half a laugh. “You don't sound as if you were very happy as a cop.”

He holds her gaze for a moment, now piercing as always. “Well it... wasn't what I expected it to be like, that's for sure”, he says, words wrapped in a long sigh. “But I don't think that I ever asked myself if I was happy or not. I never really thought of doing anything else that wasn't... fighting injustice, if you want to call it that way.” He suddenly looks away and then, as if remembering that he's still talking to someone, yanks his head back, smirking the tiniest bit. “Well, not true. When I was a kid I wanted to join the Men in Black.”

The absurdity of that afterthought makes her laugh despite herself, and the smirk on his face grows a bit wider.

“And then later...”, he continues, his voice growing darker again, chasing the upcoming levity out of the room. “I was briefly considered for a scholarship after high school. The idea was that after my Bachelor's, I could've joined the Spectres' training programme. My father didn't like the idea, though; he's got a problem with the Spectres in general.” There's a pause, and a dark cloud moving over his face, making him frown. “You know, he... told me once he'd support me in whatever I decided to do with my life. But when it came down to it, he only supported me when I was doing what he wanted me to. I thought that I just had to shoulder it and get on with my life. And so I became a cop, just like him. Then spent all of my time in the police disappointing him, of course, because as it turns out, I'm not him.”

It rings very familiar, again. It's true that a lot of her inner turmoil is based on expectations; her own first and foremost. But that alone isn't much an issue, if it isn't for the fact that expectations are easy to disappoint. And she doesn't know what's worse – disappointing other people, or disappointing herself. It looks to her like a choice between the devil and the deep blue sea. “So when Shepard invited you here, I guess it wasn't a difficult decision?”

Garrus hesitates briefly, and when he answers, he sounds careful. “It was, at first. Because... no matter how much my father and I butted heads, and how much we disagreed on the methods, I didn't dislike the job per se, only how... inefficient I was at it.” He leans back into the armchair, looks around the flat. “Going with Shepard meant starting from scratch, building a reputation, a business. Doing jobs I don't like, less resources.” His eyes dart back, meeting hers. “But it still didn't take me longer than an hour to realise that it was better than just continuing with the beaten track.”

Just leaving everything behind and starting out new somewhere on not more than an invitation sounds fearless, bold to her, something she isn't sure holds true for her as well. But so far, their talk, however unexpected, appears to move the pieces of her inner puzzle, shakes them up and maybe, in the end, they'd make more sense to her if she can get a different perspective on them. It's worth the little risk of asking a very personal question; personal both for her, and for him. “Did you ever... fear that you might have been... running away, when you came here?”

Garrus doesn't answer right away. His shrewd eyes seem to pierce through her, alert as if he's looking for her motif; but if she isn't mistaken, he's shaken, too. She already knows the answer as the look in his eyes softens again. “Yes.”

It's not what she's hoped to hear. Maybe she's bet a bit too much on his fearlessness, as if it could help her gather the courage to just go to Sweden, everything else be damned. She shifts on the sofa, draws her knees closer without noticing it. It's another piece of the puzzle, though – can she still live with herself when she runs away from the chance of a lifetime, just because she might want something else a little more? It's definitely a no-win-scenario, she's always going to regret not doing the other thing, no matter what she decides.

“But only once”, Garrus says. Tali hasn't noticed the rock in her stomach so far, but now, it cracks. “Most of the time, it just tests my patience. And you know how patient I am.” His voice is dripping with sarcasm now, much more like he usually sounds. “My sister actually asked me once if my decision to leave Cipritine meant that I gave up. But the longer I'm here... No. It wasn't running away. It was a damn good decision, even if it takes patience and...” He hesitates. She thinks she knows his expression, it looks like she's felt a minute ago, a little insecure, careful even; unsure if he should tell something private to someone who's more an acquaintance than a friend. And as if he's about to confess something he doesn't like to admit. “And was pretty scary for a bit.”

A silence emerged, and with it; everything starts to sink in. The puzzle is still moving, still rearranging, but she thinks to see a clearer picture no, even if she doesn't quite know where that will lead here. At the moment, though – it's also lot to digest.

“Tali... I...”, says Garrus. He's watched her, apparently misinterpreted her silence. “I don't have a recipe against the scariness, I'm afraid, but... If I've learned anything in the last months then it's this: Whatever you do, make it your decision. All the failures along the way will be yours; but so will be all the things that turn out right, all the successes. Own them, all of them. That's as comforting as it gets, I think.”

He's right, somewhere behind everything she knows that. All out of sudden, though, she feels tired. It's been such a long day, and she hasn't been prepared for all this. Not for all those revelations. “That's... nice of you to say.”

At this, a smirk moves over his features. A satisfied smirk, to boot. She suddenly remembers that when she first met him, she actually found that tiny way he smirked interesting. Attractive, even, in a way.

Though he definitely doesn't need to know that. “Continue like that and I'm starting to think your not such a bad guy after all, Vakarian.”

He clears his throat without missing a beat. “Is that the point where I'm supposed to say 'Don't tell anyone, I've got a reputation to uphold'?”

“Oh, don't you worry. I usually don't feel the need to talk to anyone about you.”

“You don't talk about me? I'm hurt”, he replies, his voice dripping with smooth sarcasm.

Tali laughs, it's good just to be back at trading snark. “You ego is big enough as it is”, she says, blatantly ignoring that she just saw evidence to the contrary. “But if you don't mind... can I come back to the offer with the brandy?”


	30. A Past and Future Problem - Pilgrimage (Tali)

It's 9pm when Shepard returns home, after spending nearly two hours in the traffic jam. Tali and Garrus, at that point, were watching and commenting on the Armax Arena broadcasts, even though Tali only had half of a mind for it. 

Then it's 10pm, public transportation functions again, and despite both Shepard's and Garrus' offers to drive her home, Tali prefers the anonymity of a bus just to have a moment for herself and her thoughts.

It's clearer now, the picture in her mind; the crossroads of which decision she wants to make. Looking at that picture doesn't exhaust her as much any more, doesn't rile her up so much either; maybe it's just because she's too tired to be either of these things at this moment. 

At 11pm, she finally is at home. 

There's still light in the study when she returns, of course, auntie Raan is still working.

She thinks of just quietly slipping into the bathroom and then into her bed; it's so late and after the bus drive alone with herself, she feels far less communicative than usual. Not speaking of the fact that there's a vague thing in her head; a vague solution to her job-dilemma, but... she feels like she needs to protect it for a while, lest she wants to be swayed by something else immediately. 

But auntie Raan doesn't deserve being avoided totally just because Tali could just fall asleep while standing upright. And of course, as soon as she has taken off her boots and jacket and the bag with her things from work is stored in her room, the door to the study opens and her aunt emerges from it.

Of course, a minute later they both sit on the couch over a cup of hot tea and talk.

“So you've been with the detectives? They seem to need your help rather often”, auntie Raan says. The increased frequency with which Tali spends time with Shepard and Garrus hasn't been lost on her.

“It was just a broken drone today”, Tali replies. “Garrus and I just took stock of the damage, and the other time... well. I was simply stuck there because of the snow.”

“You know that there are rules as to where and for what purpose private investigators are allowed to use drones, don't you?”

“I don't know what they're going to use it for”, Tali says truthfully, tests her tea but it's still too hot to drink. “Shepard said she just wanted to try out flying it in the park in the Upper Wards and crashed it into a tree.”

Shala'Raan stifles a short laugh. “Well, the tree will probably not sue her for it.”

They talk a bit about this and that, about their days at work, about a case auntie Raan is working on that seems to take ages, she says she's probably going back to work over the weekend for it. 

It's time spent well, even though Tali still yearns for her bed; they don't always have the time to talk with one another just so. Shala'Raan is a busy woman.

“Tali...”, auntie Raan says, her face turning more solemn and Tali feels the easiness of the last minutes leave the room. “I saw Daro'Xen on the board meeting in the afternoon.”

Of course, the meeting of the Quarian Admiralty board, the most important figures in Quarian society. The name still stems from their time as seafaring nomads, though today – with the Quarians spread over all of the continent – it's more a big group talk over the internet. Tali almost forgot about the meeting, her father used to be one of the Admirals, as are Shala'Raan, and Daro'Xen. But ever since her father died, Tali hasn't kept much track of the meeting schedule, most of them are private anyway.

But the way Shala'Raan opens this particular topic, Tali has an idea where it leads. “Kee'lah, did she... did she complain that I didn't call her so far?”

Auntie Raan allows herself a minimal sigh, which is about as much annoyance as she ever displays. As a lawyer, she's learned to keep a straight face. “You know her. She asked me to remind you that the deadline runs out on Monday and that she...”

“... works on Saturdays, as well.” Tali sighs now, too. She's talked to her aunt about the position, of course. About both of her potential positions, actually. But she's also tried her best to keep her struggles to herself, to not burden auntie Raan with her indecisiveness. “I know I need to call her.”

“I've never wanted to put more pressure on you, too, Tali”, auntie Raan says carefully. “But you're right. You need to call her. Everything else would be impolite.”

“I never wanted to... to appear as if I'm not appreciating the offer.” And there the initial levity of their talk goes, flying out of the room together with Tali's stabilised mood. “I do. I'm sorry, auntie Raan. I'll call Daro'Xen first thing in the morning.”

Much to her surprise, Shala'Raan scoots over a little closer, puts a hand on her shoulder. “I make this sound like a disappointed mother, don't I?”, she says. “That's not what I intended. But... if this troubles you, I'm here. If you need a pair of ears or a piece of advice.”

“I know, thank you.” 

Back when they both were students at the University of Thessia, Shala'Raan and Tali's mother Maya became friends. Her mother knew auntie Raan even before she met her father, Shala'Raan was a bridesmaid at her wedding, was there when Tali was born, too. 

When Maya'Zorah died, if there was anyone as grief-stricken as Tali and her father, it was her. And when Rael'Zorah died as well, Shala'Raan took Tali in without so much as batting an eye. 

There has been her childhood home, of course; a flat in the Rayya quarters that belong to Illium in the north. But as it turned out, Tali's father went into debts with risky investments into his company that didn't pay off. After his death, the company was completely taken over by Daro'Xen and moved to the Citadel, and Tali was left with debts next to her grief. Moving in with auntie Raan and leaving everything on the Rayya behind at that time sounded like the only option. 

And in Tali's head, she can't logically ask for anything more, but now that she understands what she wants to do with her job-dilemma, she fears she has to. And she has to do it now, even if it's so late.

“Auntie Raan... I have to ask you something”, she starts, already regrets it a little. The hand on her shoulder doesn't vanish, and after a deep gulp of now lukewarm tea, she has to continue. “I know I said that living with you here would just be a temporary solution after father's death and that I would move out as soon as I have enough money to stand on my own feet. And I wanted to look for a flat as soon as I started working with Daro'Xen, but... I think I want to...” The hand on her shoulder is still there, still warm. She needs to get this out of her system. “Can I live here for a few more weeks until I... go to Sweden, I mean if... that works out? And when I come back, can I come back here until I have found a job? We can put my stuff away in that time, of course, then you can have your guest room back...” 

Tali never gets to finish, Auntie Raan simply hugs her now, and the tension in her body decreases a little. “This will always be your home if you want it to be, even if I'm not your parent. Of course you can stay here and come back after Sweden.”

For a moment, Tali just relishes in the hug, listens to her own breath calming down. “I know it's arrogant to honestly consider turning Daro'Xen down”, she mutters into her aunt's shoulder then. “I mean... it's father's company. I always wanted this. But now... I think I want something else maybe five percent more.” 

If there's any way to live with her own expectations and the disappointment at deciding to leave the path she's always went on, with the regret of having passed a big chance, then it's the realisation that she needs to do the thing she wants most. Even if it sounds terribly selfish to her, terribly childish and it's definitely going to be scary for a bit.

If she's going to make this her decision, it's the only way out.

“You shouldn't be so sad about it”, Shala'Raan says softly, and Tali looks up to see her smiling. “You should be happy that you've found another passion in your work with Professor Adams.”

It's infinitely relieving to not face a lack of understanding for her motifs, but on the other hand; Tali's own doubts and worries are not quite soothed. 

“I do... I think. But...” The decision is still too new, there are still too many 'but's and 'what if's in her head. “Daro'Xen has an all-Quarian company. The research will benefit our common cause. And father would be proud and... it's where I was always headed. I've always expected that this company is where my future would be. And now... there's a tempting different offer, and it's less financially secure, and … has nothing to do with the Quarian cause. At least not directly, and... I feel so selfish.”

It feels good though to let it all out for once, not having to think of making the words sound eloquent or her situation understandable for someone else.

“We can't predict how our work will benefit the people around us”, Shala'Raan says. Her office and flat are in the Embassies, not in the Tonbay quarters, and a part of her clientele is non-Quarian. Parts of the Admiralty Board are not too happy about it, while others greatly admire her for her decision. “Maybe what you now decide to do will one day turn out to be essential for us regaining our homeland; or maybe a person you meet along the way will turn the fate of our people. Maybe it's even a person you would have never met otherwise, maybe what will help us in the end is just the experience you gather. You can't predict the future.”

It hasn't occurred to Tali yet to see it from this angle, and in a way, it's comforting. “Looking at it that way, it almost sounds a second Pilgrimage”, she says, actually smiling a little.

“Then why not consider it one?”


	31. Intermezzo - Invitations (Garrus)

True to its beginning, winter really is rather exhausting this year. 

They don't catch a break from the snow until the mid of December, and just in time for the new year, the next cold front comes rolling up bringing even more snow. Observation shifts outside have never been less fun.

On the other hand, Shepard is rather enthusiastic about Christmas, which is a little contagious even though Garrus himself has never seen a Christmas tree up close before this year. When Shepard insists he should call his family on what she calls 'Boxing Day' and he ends up with Solana on the other phone, it's ten weird minutes because he has to tell his – slightly overprotective – older sister that no, nothing happened just because he called her on a random Tuesday at the end of December. He doesn't really call his family all that often, they live by 'no news is good news' and at least for Garrus, this works just fine.

There's a certain odd normalcy to his life lately, a basic routine without it being unbearably structured and frankly boring. The jobs have become more varied; Bailey still asks them from time to time and Shepard recently put out her feelers in the direction of the Presidium precinct, so there's definitely potential for more. 

In January, he realises it's a year now that he lives on the Citadel and with all the ups and downs, he can honestly say it's been a good year. Shepard seems to think so, as well; her Christmas-induced high spirits don't really leave in January. 

They also keep the Christmas tree until it looks more like an assembly of dried sticks out of Shepard's sentimentality for the holiday, but he gets his small satisfaction when she has to vacuum clean the whole living room and hallway after the tree shed all its needles when she finally decides to say goodbye to it in the middle of January.

“Under the sofa? Really? How can they get under the sofa, the tree stood at the other freaking end of the room!”, he hears her swear in between the noises of the cleaner.

He just takes a beer out of the fridge and leans against the counter, watching her heaving up their sofa. 

He just wants to remind her that there're still dried needles under the coffee table, but the door bell saves her. “I'm going.”

The noises of the vacuum cleaner cease, and with a half-annoyed grunt Shepard flops onto the sofa so loudly Garrus can still hear her from the hallway.

After the last months, Garrus isn't surprised any more as it turns out to be Tali in front of their door. She visits often; more in their office hours usually, but that she would find their flat in case it's a little later has had to happen sooner or later. “Hey, is it an unfortunate time or can I...”, she starts, but then her eyes fall onto the garbage back that currently holds the remains of the Christmas tree, properly taken apart next to another heap of needles. “Is that a dead fir tree?”

“Spruce”, he gives back. “Apparently they look better than firs when you put these glittery balls on them. Or so I've heard.”

“Oh, it's a Christmas tree! Gabby and Ken got rid of theirs three weeks ago”, Tali counters, just as Shepard comes in from the living room.

“Barbaric”, she grumbles. “You can't get rid of the tree only a few days after Christmas! That's not the spirit!”

“Quarians also don't know about this tradition, right?”, he just mutters into Tali's direction. 

“Nope”, she gives back. “Doesn't mean I don't like it, though! Gabby and Ken's tree looked gorgeous!”

Shepard heaves a small sigh. “Can I help you, Tali? You can come in, of course; but the living room is...”

“... a little battlefield at the moment”, he continues, allows himself a smug undertone that Shepard acknowledges with a slap on his arm.

“Thanks, it won't take long.”

When he wants to retreat into his room with his beer, though, Tali holds him back. “No, I need you both.”

It's a bit confusing, even though over the winter, their relationship has become... warmer, in a way. The prospect of going to Sweden has filled Tali with so much sheer energy after the first few days in which her final decision probably seemed very... well, final, to her that it's hard for him to not be happy for her, too. Every time she's come to visit them in the last few weeks there's been something new; a picture of the room she's going to rent, a story about her future employer, news that her current boss at the University offered her at least a temporary position after her return to the Citadel. She's always told that to Shepard, of course, he just happened to be around, too, most of the time. 

He would have thought that it would be welcome if he offered them privacy; in contrast to their office, his presence in the living room is seldom a must. Apparently, he's wrong about that, too.

“I just wanted to tell you that I've finally booked a flight”, Tali says when they sit in the living room. She's smiling from ear to ear, eyes sparkling; a far cry from that one time in November. He has to admit that he prefers this over that previous gloominess any day. 

“Congratulations!” Shepard, who sits next to Tali on the sofa, immediately pulls her in for a hug.

“Thanks. It's on January 28, and... well. I've just been to Wrex' place and he agreed that I can use the bar on the Friday before that for a good-bye party.”

Garrus looks over to Shepard, who absolutely keeps a straight face at this. He also suppresses a grin; of course Wrex would agree. Shepard already asked him at the end of November, after Tali's stay abroad was more or less only a matter of time, if they could use the bar for a surprise party.

“And you two absolutely need to come, both of you!”

He's not totally sure why he feels so unusually elated at this invitation, maybe because he expected just to be around by default because he's Shepard's partner and Shepard organises everything. 

Maybe it's also because he prefers to look forward to the party to feeling a little odd thinking that after that, Tali will be gone for half a year.


	32. Intermezzo - Vodka and Ryncol, the Second (Tali)

Preparing for Sweden is both exciting and exhausting. Everything worked out fine after Tali made her decision – relatively speaking – Daro'Xen only made a little scene when Tali called her and told her that she has decided for a different offer. Then, when she talked to Professor Adams' friend on the phone, they immediately got into a talk about her previous research, and just a day later she received a formal invitation for six months as a research assistant in Lund.

Tali then quickly has had to admit she has underestimated the amount of paperwork involved, and the amount of days she simply has to spend waiting for replies from various people and offices.

And the amount of days she needs for packing.

At least, she doesn't have to worry about renting out her room for six months. She can be sure that when she comes back in summer, her room will still be there, still look the same way, and the feeling is rather comforting.

The days fly by quicker than she has anticipated, and before she knows it, it's the end of January and her departure is just two days away.

She's called everyone she's close with and invited them to Wrex' bar, and before she knows it, it's her last Friday evening on the Citadel and Gabby and Ken are chatting with Liara, Shepard starts the evening playing chess (and losing) against Sam. Grunt liberally hands out shots for everyone, and Wrex and Garrus are talking about weapon modding (it's always the same with them, really). Tali's tried to get Veetor to attend, too; but since he only knows Shepard in person and none of her other friends, he declined. He currently has an internship in a children's clinic, and though it's exhausting, he seems to genuinely enjoy the work there. Shala'Raan also declined, citing she's 'not feeling young enough to spend an evening amongst the youth', and wasn't even swayed when Tali mentioned that Wrex is nearing 70. Tali would have tea with both of them tomorrow.

It's hard to say goodbye to them all in a way; to know that she isn't going to see either of them in person for half a year. She's been around them for so long – she knows Gabby and Ken since her first day at University more than two years ago, and even Samantha – who has always been kind of the ‚new one‘ in their little group of friends has been a constant factor in her life since one and a half years. Not to speak of her aunt, or Veetor.

It helps seeing this all as her second Pilgrimage, but it's something else than just studying at a normal university in a different town compared to her home town. She's not a student any more, she's actually working now. Doing research. Trying to start her own life.

Tonight though, whatever is going to happen in the next months is not going to matter. Tonight, what matters are just her friends.

Grunt surprises her with a water gun-shooting contest between himself, Wrex and her a bit into the party. They shoot at bottles and empty cans all over the bar, drench half of the other guests in died water. Shepard clearly enjoys the sight, even though Grunt hit her with a particularly large dose of water. She tells Tali later that in her own military training, she did worse than Tali does now after the same amount of training.

A drinking contest between Shepard and Grunt follows - partly motivated by revenge for Shepard's wet clothes. The contest is aborted before either of them can finish their second bottle of vodka, though. Both are in perfect condition afterwards which solidifies Tali's assumption that Shepard is not fully human.

A little later, Shepard and Grunt decide to settle their dispute in the sparring ring in Wrex' basement; and Shepard talks Grunt into making it a two-vs-two fight. She of course recruits Garrus as her second, Tali suspects she's testing out his suitability for her aspirations at Armax Arena. Grunt recruits a cousin of his, a young Krogan named Dagg, and the number of Krogans in the room drastically increases as the fight is announced.

Tali isn't quite sure how this escalated so quickly, but she has to admit to being intrigued by actually seeing Shepard in real action. And Wrex once told her that a party is not a real party unless there's some fighting, a sentiment Shepard apparently shares.

Amongst her friends who aren't as used to Krogan antics as she is, Sam seems rather torn between excitement and exchanging winning probabilities with Liara, while Gabby is clearly a little overwhelmed by the craziness. Tali just hands her a shot of vodka. “You'll get used to it.”

“You're actually the only one who knows enough about both sides, who do you think is going to win?”, Sam says to her as Grunt and Dagg ready themselves with a few battle cries.

“Looks simple enough to me”, Ken says. “The lady sure is an amazon, but this Grunt-fellow and his friend look like battering rams.”

“Don't discard Shepard and Garrus so lightly”, Liara intervenes, cheeks flushed red from a glass of vodka. “I know they're going to win this!”

Tali herself isn't so sure about that, though. Not that she wants Shepard to lose, but Grunt and Dagg are... well, as Ken so aptly stated, battering rams, and this is a hand-to-hand fight.

In the end, the fight isn't nearly as clear-cut as either party of supporters wanted it to be. The atmosphere is loud and cheery, almost like in a real boxing match, though the Krogan supporters are obviously in the majority. They start cheering for Shepard, though; as she manages to land a headbutt on Grunt (for which she needed to jump up). And Garrus proves to be a good tactical fighter, but it doesn't earn him any supporters amongst the Krogan – in the end, he's still a Turian, no matter how well he gets along with Wrex. After half an hour and several bruises for both teams, Wrex calls it a draw, which surprises quite a few people.

Liara is besides herself with pride when she and Sam evaluate the fight in what sounds like an official statistic.

As the contestants leave the ring, and Gabby berates Ken for staring a bit too long at Shepard's behind, Tali catches herself doing the something similar and thinking that Garrus in a simple t-shirt and without his glasses is a sight she could get used to. It certainly has something to do with the alcohol, she's already had a few shots herself. Or more likely not enough, and so she goes to get herself another vodka.

The party returns to some semblance of normal after that, the people split into groups and Tali moves from table to table to speak to all of them again before the evening ends.

After their excursus into statistics, Sam is playing chess against Liara now while sharing a few tales from University. Gabby and Ken mingle a bit, talk to Shepard for a while and then to Sam once more, but in the end, both of them and Sam say goodbye a bit after midnight, after Tali spend about an hour at their table alone.

“You've got to try that delicacy of theirs, this rotten fish in cans, I forgot the name”, Ken says to her as they are saying goodbye at the door. “Don't let it turn your stomach, though.”

“See you in summer, I guess”, says Gabby. She looks like Tali feels, somewhat nostalgic and sad and still excited. “I'll make sure nobody gets your desk.”

“Great party, Tali. Thanks for the invitation”, says Sam. “Have a great time over there in Europe, will you?”

She takes her turn at hugging all of them, the lump in her throat getting bigger and bigger. “I'll see you all in August, take care and have a good time with... without me.”

And then, the three leave in a cab, Tali waves goodbye but only until it vanishes behind the corner. She never thought leaving would be easy.

At the moment, the best medicine against this is probably getting back into the thick of the party, and maybe another vodka.

Inside, there's a circle of chairs around a small table now, and Tali doesn't quite believe her eyes when she figures out that Shepard is playing a crossover of 'truth or dare?' and 'spin the bottle' with Liara, Grunt and a few younger Krogans. Of course, she has to join.

It's a brilliant measure to get her spirits up again, they play a while before Grunt seems to have had enough after he took 'truth' and had to admit to a weakness for a kids' television show about mutated dinosaurs.

“Oh come on, Shepard. This is boring”, he grumbles, and takes his turn at spinning the bottle so vigorously as if he wants it to lift off the table. Tali gets a little sick just watching it. “Whoever gets the bottle must fight me, that's a good action!”

“Grunt, for the last time”, Shepard gives back, a little like an annoyed teacher with a stubborn kid. “You can only say what you want after the bottle head points at someone and that someone selected truth or dare, not before.”

After what seems like at least a minute of spinning, the bottle head points at Tali, of course. “Lucky me”, she deadpans.

“Dare!”, growls Grunt. “Fight me!”

“I'm not risking my bones, Grunt”, she says in the most final tone she gets out in her state.

Grunt lets out a disappointed huff and pouts. “Fine, at least have a shot of Ryncol then.”

“She hasn't even chosen dare, Grunt”, Shepard says tonelessly.

But for some reason, Tali feels like being a nice friend and after all the vodka, Ryncol suddenly looks like an interesting idea. It's a daring thing to do, drink the Ryncol, after that story of losing her eyesight... but on the other hand, she's seen it all, so what about the hesitation. Ryncol is just a liquid, after all.

To say it burns is the understatement of the year, though. She chokes on it, splutters and distributes the greenish liquid evenly between Grunt's, Shepard's and her own shirt, very much to everyone's amusement.

“Goddess, Tali!”, says Liara, who miraculously evaded the Ryncol-rain. “Are you alright?”

Tali can't answer until someone hands her a glass of water, while Grunt and a few other Krogans laugh. Very loudly.

“Never. Again”, are her first words once speaking is an option again. But on the other hand, she can't help but laugh at her own stupidity, along with the others.

Still chortling, she excuses herself a little later to clean her hands and face, it turns out Ryncol is sticky.

She finds Garrus standing at the bar by himself, though; leaning onto the counter and looking over everyone. He's still not wearing neither his button-up shirt nor his glasses and she'd guess he looks bored, but something tells her he isn't.

It's probably her good mood after the Ryncol didn't knock her off her feet that makes her do it, but she finds herself moving closer to him instead of towards the bathroom, waving her hands in front of his face, giggling a little too much for an attempt at appearing sober.

He waits with a comment until she's directly in front of him, though, doesn't move a muscle before he grabs her hand mid-air and says: “Ever heard of something called 'contact lenses'?”, with a little grin and lets her arm go again. “I'm not blind, just far-sighted.”

She can't help herself, she bursts out laughing. Something about this all is just a little too absurd. “Sorry”, she says in between her giggles. “It was too tempting to pass up.”

“Like the Ryncol?”, he says smugly. “How is it, by the way, if you tasted anything before you made it a shower?”

“I don't think it's meant to taste of anything”, Tali replies, leans onto the bar next to him. “It simply burns.”

But Garrus doesn't snark back right away. There's an odd look in his eyes now, somewhat unfocussed, looking at the whole room and somehow not seeing anything in particular. And he smiles, a real smile, not a smirk.

“Is something the matter? Or did Dagg's last punch knock you out?”, she asks, leans a little forward to playfully look at a bruise forming on his arm below the hem of his shirt. 

Very much to her renewed surprise, though, the smile doesn't leave his face, but his eyes return to their usual sharpness. “No, that little clap isn't enough to get me spaced out. It's just... I think I found the answer to something my sister asked me a few months ago.”

She splutters a little again, but there's no Ryncol to spray the floor with now, thankfully. “You solve a puzzle in the middle of a party? You're weird. You could've played with us!”

He chuckles. “I'll pass the children's games, thanks. Didn't look for the puzzle, either, the answer just came to me.”

He doesn't elaborate, just orders two vodka from the bartender and hands her one. A little perplexed, she accepts it and waits for his toast to explain what this is about, it's odd to see him so... solemn? After he mostly snarks at her in good spirits usually, anyway. “We've been talking about this a while ago, and maybe it's a good thing to tell you this: coming here to the Citadel was the best decision of my life so far. And here's to Sweden going to be the best decision of your life.”

He raises his glass to her, a gesture she copies. “To leaving the beaten track?”, she half-asks to confirm his intentions, and suddenly feels a little more sober again, even though it's the good kind of quiet and serene sober.

Garrus just nods, his eyes not leaving hers. “Yes. For one or another reason.”

“Cheers.”

The vodka burns down her throat, and it certainly won't be the last one today. It's a bit like all those months ago when she came to _Kal'Ros & Co _for the first time, a bit like in November when Garrus handed out the Turian brandy; just that today, it just a bit different.

“Your reputation is crumbling”, she says to him. In contrast to those other two times, she isn't uncomfortable in his presence any more. It's not like with Gabby or Shepard or Sam, but... maybe, they've become something like friends in their own right over the last few months. 

Or it's the alcohol.

“I know my secret's safe with you”, he deadpans in return.

In retrospect, Tali considers herself happy that she still remembers that the night ended with them all sleeping somewhere in Wrex‘ huge apartment, because they all – Shepard included – ended up more than a little tipsy.

It's Garrus and Shepard that get her and Liara home the next morning – well, they get Liara directly to the University and Tali opts to walk the remaining distance back home, she still feels a little hungover and the air is clear that morning in late January.

“Have a pleasant journey, and enjoy your stay“, says Liara when they part ways, a genuine smile on her face.

“Have a good time over there, Tali“, says Shepard, and gives her a big hug.

“Stay in practise with that shotgun“, says Garrus and grins his tiny grin.

She rolls her eyes, but starts feeling a bit nostalgic, and that before she has even left. “Sure, it's the first thing I'll do. Check out a shooting range and register“, she deadpans.

“That's the spirit“, Garrus replies dryly.

For a moment, she thinks she's going to miss that snarking. She shakes his hand as a farewell gesture, just like she always does with him.

But when he and Shepard are back in his car, she feels like she's wanted to hug him, too.

She blames the alcohol.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, they get along! I did promise this is going to be a romance, after all.  
> There's one thing I'd like to mention, though, about this particular part of the story: I've been writing this at a time where I, like Tali here, left University and had to decide what to do with my life. I admit it was a bit like therapy writing this particular set of chapters, and I particularly enjoyed writing the long talk between Tali and Garrus. In a way, I needed to write this as much as Tali needed someone to remind her that her future is her decision.


	33. Call Me, Maybe - It starts with a 'G' (Garrus)

His phone rings, it's 5:30 pm. He nearly doesn't believe the display, but answers anyway. “Yea---“ 

He never gets to even finish this simple word, though. “You wouldn't believe what happened today!...“

“Tali…?“

“…I found the most beautiful park, it's the botanic garden of the University here and there's this greenhouse with tropical plants...!“

She probably hasn't called to tell him that. “Uh, Tali; this is---“

“They have water lilies with pads the size of car wheels! Can you believe that?“

Finally, she pauses. It's become a little uncomfortable for him. “Actually yes, I've seen those, too. But Tali - why are you telling me this?“

There's a quiet on the other end, apart from him hearing the cogs in her head move. And then: “… Garrus?!“ She sounds like someone hit her across her head.

“Yes. Who did you expect?“

“Keelah, I'm so sorry. I wanted to call Gabby, I must have… Oh damn it. This is a little embarrassing.“

He knows he shouldn't enjoy her awkwardness as much as he does, but he hardly gets the chance to catch her off-guard like that. It's been a bit over week since she's left, and hearing her leaves an oddly pleasant feeling somewhere within him. “No problem. Pity though, I thought you were calling me on purpose.“

“Uh… no, I'm sorry“, she replies. She still sounds awkward, as if he's actually got a point – but he's sure they both know he‘s just joking, anyway. “I had a phone-date with Gabby, as I said. You know, with the time difference we needed to schedule it.“

Maybe he should stop teasing her, she's really sounding uncomfortable. “Right, must be 11:30pm where you are?“

“Yes, it's late here.“

“You're doing okay?“

“Yes, fine. The University is amazing! And the town, too – it's so small you wouldn't believe it“, she says. The awkwardness hasn't hardly left her voice yet, and when she continues, it only grows stronger. “Uhm… sorry, Garrus. I really need to call Gabby now, I have to get up early tomorrow.“

“Sure, no problem. Good to hear you're doing fine, though.“

“Thank you. So… hear you later?“

He doubts it, but August is still 'later‘. “Of course. Bye.“

“Yes, bye.“

And with that, she hangs up. He doesn't think much of it, it's been an accident, that's all.


	34. Call Me, Maybe - Promise is promise (Tali)

It's three days later, on a Sunday afternoon, when she dials the number again, on purpose this time. It must be about 10am on the Citadel. She knows from Shepard that they both go running in the morning, but she doubts they would be doing it this late. Garrus has always appeared to her like an early bird.

She feels a little stupid for considering this, but she has more or less promised it.

He doesn't sound like he is doing any sport or has done recently when he answers his phone, but she thinks to hear surprise in his voice. “Hey Tali, how are the water lilies doing?“

Of course, not a normal 'hello', that would be too much to ask. She rolls her eyes like too often when he talks, but it stopped being grating a while ago. “Fine, I think. I haven't seen them since Thursday, in fact.“

“Any other foreign plant life you want to tell me about?“

“I came across a giant form of a Venus Flytrap, too. I think it's big enough to eat humans, even the tall ones.“

“I wonder who you're talking about“, he says, sarcasm dripping from his voice. He sounds different than in person with the phone distorting his voice, but still recognisable. “Well… I take it you didn't want to talk to your friend Gabby this time?“

“No, I actually thought I make good on the 'hear you later‘ from Thursday“, she says, it still feels a little awkward on her tongue. “If you're not occupied otherwise, of course“, she adds quickly, catches herself half-hoping he would say 'yes'.

Because she has no idea what to talk about, even less why she even called apart from a vague statement of hers.

“Well, I need to fix the drone again, but that's not going to be a big issue. Let me get my headset, though.“

Tali still remembers that drone, of course. “Don't tell me Shepard flew it again?“

Something on the other end rustles, and when Garrus speaks again, he sounds different once more, like a bit farer away. “She did. Yesterday. But I'm afraid she wasn't the issue here. You remember the rotor blades we ordered last time?“

“Is something wrong with them?“

“I'm not sure. Thing is, the drone is rolling drunk. Even Joker wouldn't get it flying straight. You know Joker?“

“Shepard's army friend, the pilot? I heard of him, and I think his girlfriend proofread my thesis.“ The comments of Shepard's friend have been most helpful, and their exchange via e-mail rather fascinating. Tali has actually hoped to one day meet this friend of Shepard's in person.

“Oh? You mean Edi?”

“Well, the woman I'm talking about signed her e-mails with 'Dr. M. Harper', so ...”, Tali says, even though she's rather sure that they're talking about the same person. Maybe 'Edi' is a nickname.

“Must be her. Joker introduced her as Edi Harper, they're visiting. Figured he could throw a look at his home town after his last tour.“ There's a sound on the other end as if two metallic objects hit each other. “Anyway. You sure didn't call to hear stories about home. How's it going in … uh… Lund? Found a shooting range yet?“

“You didn't think that'd be the first thing I'd be checking out, I'm not you“, she says dryly. He replies with a short self-aware laugh. “But things are fine, mostly. I'm still fighting with the Swedish, and the road names. But my room is good, work is fun and the colleagues I‘ve met so far are really nice.“

“You know, now that you're talking about it… you never did tell me what you're actually doing over there.“

Another clicking noise, it sounds like a screwdriver.

“Regenerative and alternative energy studies, the project I'm working on deals with possibilities to increase the effectiveness of batteries. This might become important with e-cars in the future, for example.“

“That's… rather far away from artificial intelligences.“

“It is, isn't it?“, she says. She knows she sounds self-conscious, but she doesn't blame him for it. She knows by now that her two passions can be a balancing act, even though sometimes, she's still a little at odds with her final decision. It's never for long, though.

“I didn't know you're interested in that sort of thing“, he says. She wonders if he sounds appreciative, it's harder to figure out the nuances in his voice when he's on the phone. “So tell me – we're moving away from the trusty lithium-ion cell in the future? I mean, those are pretty expensive to build as I've heard.“

“That's just one problem. Lithium is getting rarer, that's another aspect. People aren't going to be interested in e-cars, for example, if we don't make them affordable, and we don't gain anything if we run out of resources in a bit more than 30 years. There's a lot of potential and room for improvement.“

“Yeah, I guess. Hey – I've read there's research about nickel-chromium cells as replacement, what's the expert's opinion on this?“

“Oh, so I'm the expert on this now?“, she says in an amused voice, feeling a bit warm around the ears.

“Well, I'm surely not“, he replies. He sounds as if he shrugs. “I'm just reading stuff online and think it's interesting.“

“You're kind of a nerd, you know.“

“Got to do something when the nights are getting long“, he says easily. He surely doesn't know how that sounds to her. “And the shooting range isn't open at 3am.“

“Well… alright then. We're not dealing with nickel-chromium cells here.“

They end up talking about cells, batteries and regenerative energies for what turn out to be 70 full minutes, and while it's not as thrilling as talking to an actual scientist, Garrus seems rather interested in everything she has to say. It's – for the lack of a better word – fun. She used to sit at her desk when she's called him, but now, she‘s lying on her bed, comfortably wrapped up in her blanket.

“They do have a lot of windparks here. In Germany, too, I've heard.“

“Are they as ugly as some people say?“ The screwdriver clicks again, and there is a slight 'Ah!‘ sound on the other hand.

“Found the heavy spot?“

“Yes, finally.“

“Congratulations. Oh, and about the windparks: it's a lot of giant windmills. Don't know why people think they're ugly.“

“Well don't ask me, I've just read… wait a second.“

There is a second voice audible, just barely, over the microphone of Garrus' headset. It's Shepard.

“Say 'hi' to Shepard for me, Garrus.“

“Greetings from Tali, Shepard“, he says obediently. Shepard says something else, but Tali can't understand what, exactly. “Yes, I've been talking to her. She's fine, she says.“ Shepard says something again, Garrus sighs. “Well, yeah. Okay. Give me a minute.“

Then, he turns back to her. “Sorry Tali. I know it's Sunday, but there's something Shepard and I need to take care of. Work.“

“Of course, I'm not keeping you.“

“Thanks for calling. It was… good to hear you. And: greetings from Shepard.“

She is just feeling warm because of her blanket, she tells herself. And not because she likes the way he makes those words sound.

She's still feeling nice today. “It was good to hear you, too, Garrus.“

“Hey, no snark this time?“

“Don't let it get to your head.“

He laughs again. She hears the screwdriver being put away and him rustling on the headset. “Will do. Well… have a good afternoon, Tali.“

“Thank you. You too, Garrus. Until…“

“… next time.“

“Yes.“

And then, he hangs up. She wonders if 'next time‘ will really come.


	35. Call Me, Maybe - I just Called... (Tali)

It only takes a few weeks, though, until the next time, and she partly wishes it would have taken longer. Because if it had taken longer, maybe she'd have had a different reason to call him than she has now.

It's Friday and it has been raining in Sweden since more than a week, the skies are constantly painted in a dull grey. It's never like this on the Citadel; a few days of rain maybe, but never longer than that. Not more than a week without any ray of light.

At work, it's terribly boring without most of her colleagues. They're at a workshop in Copenhagen, have been for the whole week. And Tali's landlady is on vacation with her daughter. It's rather … exhausting, having nobody to talk to for a few days.

She's already done everything she could think of. Has walked through town, has done some sightseeing after work. Programmed after work, tried to call her aunt (who's working on a difficult case and had no time), played video games, watched streams of the Armax Arena pro league, called Gabby (who's on vacation as well, skiing with Ken's parents). Sam is doing an internship, and Liara is in full-on-writing mode with her second dissertation, so Tali didn't want to impose on them.

And now, it's several days since her last social interaction worth mentioning, more than a week since the last ray of light. It's frankly depressing.

It's early afternoon, she always leaves work earlier on Fridays; and she's already walked through half of the town to occupy herself. There's no way around it, Tali has to admit to herself that she feels lonely. It's not the first time, either, and not a feeling she usually can't deal with. She's usually keeping herself busy. But today, nobody is there, and the thoughts begin to gnaw at her that this was her decision alone and only she is at fault for feeling lonely right now.

It's silly, and the logical part of her mind knows that. But emotions don't always make logical sense, and she needs to do something against it. She needs to speak to someone, just hear a friendly voice for a minute, break the cycle of loneliness and bad thoughts before it gets out of hand and she starts feeling _really_ alone.

And since nobody else is available, she calls the private number of Shepard and Garrus. A second later the phone connects in her hand and she realises that it's 8:45am on the Citadel and they're probably working.

But Garrus answers, and she hears metallic clicking again. “Hey Tali”, he just says. Simple, unassuming. As if it isn't strange for her to call right now.

“Hey… Garrus. If you've got something else to do, I…”

“Nah, it's fine. I'm just staring into my cereals anyway.”

It's already enough to take her mind off of the awkwardness. “Hm, I thought you're an early bird.”

“Technically. Not after a twelve hour observation shift, though. Shepard relieved me at midnight and I consequently slept in a bit.”

“Means until seven, and not five thirty?”, she says, and the teasing creeps into her words just so. It's easy, and it makes her feel better.

“Exactly”, he replies, laughs a bit. “Hey, should I be worried now that you know my schedule?”

She has to laugh a little, as well. “I'm just a good guesser, and you're obviously the 'go running before dawn' type.”

“Well maybe, but you're also a good hacker. Surveillance cameras, anyone?”

Now, she laughs fully. ”You're not _that_ important.”

“Ah… you keep on hurting my feelings”, he drawls. She knows, somehow, that he's grinning on the other end, in a flat in the Upper Wards of the Citadel. “Anyway. How can I help you, or am I being Gabby again?”

“You're not going to let me live that one down any time soon, are you?” She knows she sounds evasive, but not having to justify herself and simply keep on talking is… tempting. But Garrus is inquisitive, it's not going to last. She feels like stretching it for at least another while, though.

There is a short silence on the other end before he answers. “No. You're basically giving me free ammunition. And don't forget the water lilies.”

“I've seen them again, two days ago. Their still just as big, and it's fascinating. You said you've seen this species before, too? Where?”

“I think on a class trip… it's been a while. It just probably stuck to my memory.” There are loud noises on the other end, water running. He's done with breakfast. “Tali, I need to---”

“Yes, I know. You've got to go down to office and start working. I'm not keeping you.” Her heart beats a bit too fast, and it's hard to deny that she feels embarrassed.

“If there's something you wanted…”

“It can wait, it was nothing important”, she says quickly. She can't explain that she called him just to hear someone talk.

“Sure”, he says. Then, there's another pause that feels terribly heavy. “Say, when do you go to bed?”

“Well, at midnight, usually, why?”, she asks. He's taken her off guard with his question.

“Well I'm going to have a lot of time after noon. You know, next shift. And observations can be really boring.”


	36. Call Me, Maybe - ...to say "I'm bored" (Garrus)

He's not quite sure why he does this. He's not the 'talk a lot on the phone' type of person; and he's rarely if ever calling anyone just so. It's usually always business, or something that can be handled quicker with a call instead of a text.

But here he is – Friday afternoon, 2pm to be exact, sitting inside his car and staring onto manicured gardens and family homes with an air of 'everything is perfect' around them – and he calls Tali. It's… 8pm where she is. Too early for bed. Something about her call in the morning has been strange – apart from the fact that she's called at all – and it seems like a simple decision to him, because observations like this one bore him to tears.

And still. It's a bit strange. Or more than a bit.

It stops being strange, though, as soon as she answers and sounds far more like herself than in the morning. “Oh, hey! Didn't think you'd really call.”

“Told you I'd be bored. Anything I'm interrupting? I mean it's Friday night where you are.”

She scoffs a bit. “As if. Nothing's happening here today, and it's still raining. It _is_ a small town, I suppose.”

“Well if that's the case… let's be bored together.” As soon as the words are out, he realises that they sounded much better in his head. “Wait. That… Probably sounded kind of odd. Or horribly corny.” And he doesn't know which one would be worse.

Very much to his elation, though, Tali actually laughs. “I think I get what you mean”, she then says. She's amused, and it takes away a good part of his mild embarrassment at the situation. “Well… you're staring at other people's lives again?”

“Oh you make that sound kind of dirty.”

“Practically it _is_ rather dirty”, she replies dryly.

“Not that I'm responsible for the dirty parts, though”, he says. “Wait… that came out wrong. I mean, I'm not the one cheating on his wife here.”

“Adultery again?”

“You know it. My favourites.” There's light in the kitchen of the house he observes, and as if called upon, their target is there, with his wife, kissing her like it's still sunshine and rainbows. He allows himself a drawn out sigh. “When you're doing this for a living and see cheating spouses everywhere, you kind of ask yourself why people are getting married in the first place. Because sexual intercourse is less exciting if you don't have a ring to prove that it _is_ actually cheating?”

“That sounds pretty cynical”, she says. Her voice seems a little darker to him, but it might just be the connection.

“Well maybe. Try looking at perfect worlds from the outside knowing those worlds have more than a few cracks and don't get cynical”, he replies. “I'm telling myself that I don't get to see the happy couples, though. You know, the ones who actually take their marriage vows seriously or at least don't need to involve detectives when something goes south.”

There is a silence on the other end, and he wonders if he has said something wrong. When Tali answers, however, there is no sign of discomfort in her voice. “That would mean less jobs for you and Shepard, though.”

“Vicious cycle”, he says dryly. She chuckles at this, it feels good to hear it. “We've been moving up recently, though.” It's probably time to change the topic before he hits a landmine. Wouldn't be the first time.

“Oh? How so?”

“C-Sec hired us as consultants again.”

“You mean Bailey?”, she asks.

“No, and that's the thing”, he replies, “Bailey works in Zakera, we've been hired by the 12th Precinct, that means the precinct responsible for the Presidium.”

“Oh! That sounds good… but how come?”, she says, seeming genuinely glad for them.

“A certain Lieutenant Alenko stumbled over the story with Harkin again. Apparently, a few loose ends reappeared and Shepard and I are going to do a little housecleaning. Currently, it's a lot of paperwork, but… we'll be getting there.”

She chuckles, a lower sound than before this time. “You sound as if you're looking forward to this”, she says slowly.

“More work for the C-Sec, less adultery. I know, sounds weird from the guy who quit being a cop. But everything's a step up from watching cheating husbands.”

“You mean you'll be doing 'real' work for a change…”, she says, stretching the word 'real', what sounds extra-smug with her accent.

“Hey, that's another low blow. You sassing me?”, he replies, but he has to chuckle anyway. Tali sounds much better than in the morning.

When he hangs up three hours later, he thinks about why he did this at all, and why he doesn't want her to feel alone in Sweden. Because when he is honest with himself, that is what has bugged him in the morning; that she has sounded lonely. And evasive.

He suspects it might be because she is becoming important to him, but he dismisses any further thought a second later and doesn't think of it again. 


	37. Call Me, Maybe - On a sunday afternoon (Tali)

“It was Colonel Mustard with the lead pipe in the ballroom.”

She stares at her computer screen in bewilderment, at the colourful dots on the room plan of a fictional house, checks her notes again. “Lead pipe? I thought it was the revolver…”

“No, I ruled out that one pretty quickly, didn't make sense”, Garrus says over the phone. He sounds half-bored.

She has to check everything again just to make sure. Then, she lets out a sigh. “You're right, damn it. What a stupid idea to play Cluedo against a detective.”

On the other end, there's a short laugh. “I told you you were playing with fire. Can't blame that idea on me, though.”

“No”, she replies, decidedly ignoring how smug he sounds. “But next time we're doing this, we're playing chess.”

The laughter is even louder this time. “You want to play chess against someone who has been on a military high school? You must like losing very much.”

“Don't get smug, Vakarian”, she says with as much fake disdain – and bit of real annoyance – as she can muster. “I'm not done with you yet.”

“Oh…”, he drawls. “Those are intriguing threads, Miss Zorah.”

“So it's settled. chess. In four weeks, Sunday, April 10. 4pm, Citadel time.”

“Count me in.”


	38. Call Me, Maybe - The Detective (Garrus)

The thing about Garrus' desk down in the offices is that it's in a more or less blind spot for people coming in. They deliberately put the desks so that Shepard with her switch-on smile is seen first by any new client, another of their little arrangements that benefits them both.

However, the reason that he is overlooked today certainly has nothing to do with the position of his desk.

It's Friday evening, mid of March, a bit past 5pm. Shepard and him are working in companionable silence on a case for the Presidium precinct, a cold case probably connected to the identity forging business of one Jackson Harkin.

The doorbell rings, Shepard stops typing, looks up. He takes a bit more time to switch into 'client-mode' (which basically amounts to stopping to look at his desktop and the files there), already awaiting not to be noticed for a few seconds.

Usually, the client starts talking as soon as they've entered.

“Detective Alenko!”, it escapes Shepard's lips. She's nearly jumping up from her chair.

Well, that certainly doesn't account for 'usually' then.

“Ms. Shepard”, the man in question replies, smiling at Shepard's own beaming smile. “Sorry to drop in on you in your office hours and on a Friday evening...”

“No trouble at all!”, Shepard just gives back. She's still standing, hands stemmed onto the table as if she wants to jump again, while Alenko hasn't moved into the room, still stands on the doormat. “To what do we owe the pleasure?”

Ah, yes. _Pleasure_.

The whole business with the cops on the Presidium precinct is mostly a pleasure – there's a plethora of things to do, but not enough people in C-Sec, at least in that particular district. Shepard and him have been doing good, sensible jobs on their own terms for a few weeks now and even turned Mrs. Giles down (well, Shepard did, gently of course) when she suspected her husband cheating on her with a florist from down the street.

For Shepard, however, the pleasure of working seems to be more and more of a private nature with the detective.

“I'm just... on my way home, you know; and these records came in around lunchtime”, says Alenko, takes a folder out of his leather briefcase and hands it to Shepard. “It's what the archives dug up on the fingerprints in the Morrison case. I thought that might interest you.”

“Might come in handy, yes”, says Shepard, the smile waning into focus on the case. She skims through the documents now, nods a few times here and there. “Looking good; there might be connections to one of the cases Bailey let us investigate.”

“I was hoping you say that”, replies Alenko. “Connecting cold cases to already solved ones makes for a good way of getting rid of them.”

“We're doing our best, Detective, I promise you that”, Shepard sing-songs, snaps the folder shut and puts it onto the desk. “So thanks for the stuff. But you didn't have to bring them here all by yourself and after hours...”

And now she _winks_ at him. Maybe, just maybe, Garrus should make himself known. On the other hand, he rarely gets to see Shepard so genuinely relaxed.

Alenko rubs his neck now, he does that a lot, too; just about as much as Shepard loves to tease him. “Well, it's on my way home, and I thought it's... more personal this way.”

“You don't live on the Presidium?”

“They've got some really nice apartments, I'll give them that. But I've been living around the Upper Wards for so long now...” Shepard laughs gently at the way Alenko shrugs his shoulders about this. “... and you're living here, too; you see the Wards are quite popular.”

“Oh you're still standing there all dressed up and with nowhere to go – we've got a sofa, you know?”, Shepard says, gestures with her head back towards their client-couch.

And that in their office hours. Well, not that Garrus minds closing off for the day, but... that traps him right between the sofa and Shepard's desk. They're bound to notice him sooner or later.

“I don't know, your... card says you're still officially working”, says Alenko, but his tone suggest he's hoping a little for 6pm to come quicker. He's not the only one in the room, but Garrus has different reasons.

And Shepard looks like struck by lightning, her eyes fly to her watch, then back to Alenko, all smiles again. “Well, clients on Friday evening are seldom...”

“Why don't you just go up to the flat, I'll take it from here.”

Two pair of eyes jump over to him, and he suppresses the urge to wave his hand and say something snide.

“Oh, Mr. Vakarian...”, says Alenko. He lets his voice trail off a little. No, he hasn't taken notice of the blind spot behind the door.

Shepard even blushes, well, as much as she ever does; so hardly noticeable. “He's right, Detective”, she says quickly then. “Probably better.”

At least, she's quick to react, and ushers Alenko out of the room faster than the man can resist her, leaving Garrus alone in a now quiet office, massaging his temples.

It's not that he begrudges Shepard her levity, or that he doesn't like Alenko. The guy's sensible enough to know when C-Sec reaches their limits, smart enough to outsource problems and generally easy to get along with on a superficial level. An antithesis to Bailey's 'hard-boiled cowboy cop'-persona in some areas, but Alenko already proofed to be a reliable – and even more or less friendly – business partner. And Shepard likes him, that's also a plus.

It's just sometimes a bit much with them in the same room, especially as of late. On the precinct, it's not such a problem; there are others around, and places to go (namely: somewhere else than Alenko's desk). After a few initial suspicions from both sides, Garrus now also gets along with Alenko's partner, Detective Williams. It turns out she's good with a gun (and frequently runs Armax Arena), so after they got over the fact that Garrus is a Turian _ex_ -cop, they at least had something to talk about while their respective colleagues dedicated themselves to other topics. And each other.

But with no Williams around and thanks to it being _their_ office, that encounter today was... well. Garrus refuses to think about it too much.

It's time to get back to work, get some things done until 6.

He locks the office doors then, gets something to drink from the fridge they have in their office, his headset and locks himself in the backroom.

Good thing he never wanted to go upstairs after work for a few hours at least.

He sinks the dialling phone into his breast pocket and gets to work on the remote control car/ drone.

“Hey Garrus”, says Tali's voice on the other end. He's kind of glad to hear her.

“Wow, you don't sound all that sleepy for someone up at midnight”, he replies.

“Well, I've already had a pre-emptive coffee and I secured two bottles of coke, I think I'll manage.”

“What's it again you're watching there?”

“Long-term test of a new motor block design”, she says dryly, sighs a little. “It's doing nothing except running, and I write down a number every ten minutes or so. For the next six hours.”

“Congratulations”, he says. She's texted him about that test a few days ago, and he had nothing better to do, anyway, so why not repay the favour from a few weeks back and distract her a little bit?

“Thanks”, she deadpans. “And you? Any plans for the evening?”

“Got a few cameras that need calibrating while we're talking.”

The time flows by quickly while they're talking; it's so easy. He gets himself something to eat around 8pm, checks on some other equipment later, all the while Tali speaks of her new experiments and tests, a scientific paper she's preparing and about Swedish customs like rotting fish in cans that apparently qualifies as a delicacy. He, in turn, spreads a bit of the gossip about Shepard and a certain detective; carefully and vaguely, of course. Tali's thrilled to hear the news nonetheless.

When he hangs up at 10pm and goes up into the flat, there are multiple voices coming from Shepard's room, and laughter.

He's a decent guy, that detective. And Shepard deserves this.


	39. Call Me, Maybe - Sweet Revenge (Tali)

“Hm… it's getting a little too personal up there. King to G8.”

She doesn't miss a beat before she says: “Bishop to C4.”

There's a suppressed sigh on the other end, and when Garrus speaks again, he sounds a little wary. “King to H8.”

Just as expected, of course. “Queen to F4.”

There is a pause, and Tali thinks that she can actually hear Garrus think. The longer the silence lasts, the broader the grin on her face becomes. This is feeling good. Unbelievably good.

“Rook to… no”, Garrus says after about five minutes. She hears in his voice that he has noticed his upcoming demise, but he is probably still in denial. “Queen to… damn.”

“I thought you've been to a military high school?”, Tali says in a honeyed voice.

“Not on the chess team, though”, he grumbles. “An obvious mistake.”

“I remember _someone_ saying that I must like losing very much?”

“Must have been an idiot”, Garrus deadpans, it takes her a little off-guard because it's sincere. “You play a mean game, Tali.” It's probably the closest thing to a compliment she's ever heard him say.

“I had an excellent teacher”, she says, thinking back of all the evenings spend in Sam's dorm in front of a chess board. She needs to remember to text Sam that Garrus doesn't play chess any better than Shepard does. “So… Are you accepting your defeat?”

“Nah, forget it. I demand satisfaction.”


	40. Call Me, Maybe - About a boy (Garrus)

He has hoped he would never have to call Tali because of something related to work, but now he has. This is probably not going to be simple, also considering that she gets emotional easy and is several thousands of kilometres and six time zones away.

Still, this is most likely his best option; and she deserves to know.

“Hi Garrus”, she says, half in a question. It's 7pm where she is, he rarely calls without former notice. But now, he sits over his lunch at his desk with a big sign on the office door saying that it's closed. “This is unexpected?”

“Yes, sorry about that. Do you have a minute?”, he replies.

His official tone triggers confusion on the other end. “Uh… yes?” He hears metal clicking against porcelain, she's eating dinner. “You sound as if it's important?”

“Pretty much”, he says. He hopes after this, he won't need Shepard to smooth over things again. He's not good at being a diplomat, but he needs to be exactly that at the moment. So the only thing that remains for him is being straightforward. “It's about your cousin, Veetor'Nara.”

The metal clicking becomes somewhat final before she answers. “Is he in trouble?”

“Well, depends on how you define 'trouble'”, Garrus says. “Tali… you know he's still taking drugs?”

There is a short silence on the other end, a huffing, too. “I know”, she then says curtly. “But how do you?”

There's something accusatory in her voice, a little bit. He hasn't heard it directed at him ins so long now it's a bit... unpleasant. “Grunt”, he replies, catching himself hoping he'd evade that first potential landmine by calmly presenting the truth. “Apparently, he saw Veetor dealing with a guy called Mouse in a shady bar down in Zakera. Told Wrex first, then me and Shepard.”

“Oh great, that everyone knows about this before me!”, Tali scoffs. Of course she does. “Have you called C-Sec, too?”

She's being sarcastic, he'd probably be, too, in her shoes. Right now though, sarcasm probably would only make things worse. “We're not necessarily going to”, he says, ostensibly to calm her temper. He should have let Shepard do this – as she offered – but no. He had to do this on his own, of course.

“What do you mean?”, Tali replies sharply.

He allows himself a sigh, massages his forehead. “This is where it gets a little complicated. Tali... You remember Bailey?”

She's still somewhat indignant when she returns a short: “Yes?”

“He's recently been promoted, and doing a bit of housecleaning himself on Zakera now. Raiding gambling clubs, bars. Prominent places for dealers, too. Means---”

“Keelah! Don't tell me---” There is a sound as if she‘s jumping up.

“No!”, he intervenes, rather forcefully. “Nothing like that. As far as I know, nobody caught wind of your cousin yet.”

Tali lets out a sigh of relief. “Don't scare me like that. We had enough trouble the last time around.”

“I can imagine”, he says. He isn't fond of admitting it, but he would have been rather uncompromising with Veetor a few years ago himself. Now, though, something that Shepard said about the boy changed that. “But we don't know how often your cousin goes to see Mouse. Would be better if someone told him to steer clear of the drugs for a while, until the raids are over. That's why I'm calling. Seeing that your aunt is a lawyer we weren't sure if calling her instead would make things worse.“

“Auntie Raan knows about this”, Tali says. It sounds muffled, a bit as if she's too close to the microphone, but also calmer, and for the first time, free of hidden accusations.

“Oh yes?”

“Yes, half of my family knows it. It's not a big deal for anyone because... they help Veetor from time to time.” She draws in a long breath. “He's on medication because of some mental issues, you know. Sometimes the meds make him depressed, or anxious; and if times get a little rough, he sometimes... well, smokes a bit. He's got a new job, that's probably it. Did you talk to him, or how do you know?”

He's not replying for a moment, because this leaves him a bit speechless. It's the way Tali makes this sound, as if it's the most normal thing in the world that a whole family covers for the drug use of a teenager. After Turian standards, that would already be considered... unusual. Recreational drug use is not a major offence after Turian law, so nobody would feel the need to cover it up, especially not a whole family. It's a different thing if the use of drugs impedes the ability to serve – that would be considered as substance abuse, and is highly punishable. But ever since he got his PI license on the Citadel, Garrus used to be under the impression that even recreational drug use is seen vastly different by other cultures, and has stricter regulations on the Citadel – so that makes Tali's story... odd. But who is he to judge.

“I... well, to be fair, Shepard figured it out after you introduced her to your cousin.”

“Of course she did. Anyway. It'd really be better if I called Veetor and told him to keep away from Mouse for a while.”

“Ideally. We'd go to him ourselves, but Shepard said it's better if someone speaks to him that he actually knows better than her or Grunt.”

“I'll call him right away, and then auntie Raan so that she can have an eye on him.”

“Thanks, Tali.”

“No problem. And thank you, all of you. Giving us a chance to solve that without C-Sec is … appreciated. Veetor's had enough trouble as it is.”

“I understand.”

“Yes…”, Tali says slowly. “I guess you do.”

It feels strangely warming to hear that. “Another thing, though. Bailey's after the big fish, not a teenager who smokes a bit of weed. If things go south, and Veetor gets into trouble anyway, Shepard promised to talk to Bailey. He owes her a few favours, and chances are he'd simply let your cousin go.”

“I'd prefer not let it come that far, but thanks. Tell that to Shepard, too, please.”

“Will do.”

In the end, it's turned out not even half as bad as he has feared, and for some reason, he finds himself rather glad a little later that he was the one to make the call.


	41. Call Me, Maybe - Late night texting (Tali)

It's 10pm when she hangs up the phone after talking to Veetor, her aunt, and then Veetor again. Auntie Raan promised to check up on him, and Shepard send a text that she'll be there, too, and get in contact with her aunt so that – should something else happen – Tali wouldn't have to deal with everything on the phone from six time zones away.

After talking on the phone for so long her ear is feeling a bit warm and she exhausted, but at the same time, too restless to go to sleep. She plays video games for another two hours then, it calms her down a bit, enough to decide to call it a day after a hot shower and a cup of tea.

Sleep doesn't come easy, though.

It doesn't come in half an hour, and not in an hour, and she's halfway up to getting back onto her PC when her phone rings. It's a text.

_Garrus: Hey, I know it's late so I hope I'm not waking you up. Just wanted to say that I'm sorry we involved you in this even though you're not in the country. I know it's cheap to say, but don't worry. Your aunt just came in for dinner, she's talking with Shepard now. We've got this covered. Good night, G._

She chuckles at nobody in particular, except for the at text on her phone.

_Tali: Don't worry, I'm not sleeping, it's only 1am :) Auntie Raan told me she wanted to see Shepard, didn't know it's happening so quickly. That's good; seems I can relax... if that'd work._

She writes and sends the last bits so quickly she doesn't think them through. It's still so new at times, that they're getting along well, and so... odd. Not the bad kind of odd, but... odd.

_Garrus: You know Shepard: She doesn't do things by halves. You okay?_

Politeness demands it to answer with 'yes', but... Turians prefer honesty over politeness, don't they?

_Tali: I'm good, just... sleeping's not easy._

She doesn't know either what she expects him to answer at this. Certainly she doesn't expect his reaction in the way she receives it a minute later.

_Garrus: Try reading science mags; works for me._

She knows him well enough to know that _those_ implications have been done on purpose. She almost hears the dry comment spoken in his voice, sees the miniature smirk on his face. When she answers, she has a little grin on her face, too.

_Tali: I tend to find reading science mags thrilling, not narcotic._

_Garrus: Nerd._

“Says the guy who reads science mags to find sleep”, she mumbles to herself, but the corners of her mouth are still close to her ears.

_Tali: Correction: scientist. It's my job to read those mags._

This is probably going to escalate if they carry on like that. At least, her thoughts drift somewhere else now and don't run spirals on Veetor and her aunt and about all she can do to help them is using her phone.

_Garrus: PI here, and I find crime reports boring. That logic doesn't work._

It's vastly better to snark at Garrus right now.

_Tali: I sometimes think you find everything boring that doesn't involve a gun._

_Garrus: I doubt you want to talk about my handgun._

She chuckles once again as she reads this, just why doesn't he use emojis like a normal person does?

_Tali: I can think of more thrilling topics, yes. How's Wrex, though? And Grunt?_

She hasn't heard of them in weeks; Wrex has been on some business back in Tuchanka, and Grunt doesn't like talking on the phone.

_Garrus: Good last time I saw them, which was on Monday. Beat the old man in target practise *grin*_

This time, she breaks into a full-blown laughter at his message.

_Tali: There are real emojis on your phone, you know? You don't have to write them out like that._

_Garrus: Far less personal._

_Tali: So you're telling me it's a stylistic choice and not just you being lazy?_

She's still laughing, now at the mental image of Garrus typing on his phone getting more and more frustrated with not finding exactly the right icon for his mood and then deciding to write it out – which is a little hilarious. He, however, doesn't answer in a while, but she doubts she's actually even so much as scratched his ego with this.

_Garrus: Exactly. Congratulations, your aunt probably thinks I'm the most impolite person on the Citadel because I keep texting you while we're having dinner. Not that I care, but she keeps giving me these odd looks every time I look at my phone._

The mental image is getting better, this is becoming really absurd – which is about the best recipe against her spiralling thoughts that she can figure out right now.

_Tali: I can hardly contain my pity. Relax, she's not going to sue you for texting me :) (See, this is how emojis are done.)_

Much to her chagrin, he ignores the remark on his emoji-deficit.

_Garrus: She doesn't know I'm texting you. She probably thinks I'm texting a petulant girlfriend, at least that's what the look says._

That thought is frightening in itself – because Tali just simply knows this look. This 'you're better not be doing anything remotely stupid' kind of look she used to face more than once as a child when she slept over at her aunt's.

_Tali: Heaven forbid. I can tell her the truth tomorrow, if that makes you happy._

The reply, however, while not a downer per se, calms down the feeling of levity in her, directs her thoughts somewhere else.

_Garrus: Am I sounding that whiny? No, it's fine, Tali. I'm good. Just pulling your leg._

It's half past one now, 7:30pm on the Citadel. Now that she thinks about it, Garrus has the least to do with all this; with Veetor, with Bailey, with her, somehow. He could've left everything to Shepard like she always thought he usually does anyway, and she wouldn't think less of him.

But he didn't; he's on the phone, texting her under the table, which leaves a not unwelcome feeling in her belly that makes it worthwhile that the levity from before left.

_Tali: Thanks for doing this._

She has hardly enough time to wonder if that wasn't too much.

_Garrus: Doing what?_

It's... a surprisingly good question. What exactly does she think he's doing, she can't even pretend that she really knows him well enough for that. Maybe he genuinely wants to make her feel better, maybe it's just part of his Turian honour code to see that she's doing alright and it's been her own comments and comebacks that made this conversation go on for so long.

_Tali: Just say 'you're welcome, Tali', and don't ruin the moment._

He follows this quickly, with not one but two messages.

_Garrus: You're welcome, Tali._

_Garrus: Seriously, what do you mean?_

Well, it looks like Garrus Vakarian is still hopeless. She decides to let him stew on that one, though, maybe because she needs to stew on it herself. It's late, she really feels less restless and tomorrow is still a day.

_Tali: I'll tell you some other time, I'm getting tired._

_Garrus: Sure, no problem. Good night then._

She's already put the light on her night stand out when she writes the last message for the night.

_Tali: Good night, Garrus._


	42. Call Me, Maybe - Taxes (Tali)

It's odd how familiar this has become, and how fast.

It's already May, one week before their scheduled attempt at playing Battleship over the phone, and she waits for his voice to appear on the other end; and it's not feeling weird at all, not any more.

“Hey Tali, you're a week early”, he says as a greeting, in his usual half-serious, half-sarcastic tone.

“I know, genius, that's why I'm calling”, she counters dryly. It's also not weird any more to skip the exchange of niceties and get to the point. “We need to reschedule.”

“Oh, you've got something better to do?”, he teases, but his voice lack any self-importance. She feels a little smile creeping onto her face.

“A few colleagues of mine go to Germany over the weekend to buy alcohol and take me with them.”

“A trip abroad just to buy alcohol? They grow up so fast…”

“I'm twenty-four, _uncle_ Garrus.”

He chokes on a suppressed laugh, it sounds hilarious and she has to giggle. “No, seriously. They don't have proper alcohol in Sweden to wash down that canned foul fish?”

She's told him a few weeks back about some of Sweden's delicacies, and to say he hasn't been enthusiastic about them would be an understatement. “They do, but the taxes are much higher here than in Germany, so a lot of people buy it there. And I've never been to Germany before.”

“And you desperately need to change that, of course”, Garrus says. The sarcasm is back in his voice. “Don't think you're off the hook at Battleship, though. We still have a score to settle.”

“Yes, because you lost at chess three times in a row”, she replies, just a little smug to nettle him.

He clears his throat in the most obvious manner, which just makes her grin even broader. She doesn't know what changed, but since a few weeks, she really came to appreciate listening to his voice. It's deep, sometimes a bit dark but always smooth; it reminds her of the brandy from Cipritine he's handed out back at home.

“And I intend of winning Battleship three times in a row, at least”, he says.

“Duly noted. In two weeks, then?”

And just like so, he's back to business. “No, sorry. We've been out of office so often lately and the jobs are still piling up, Detective Alenko keeps us pretty busy. Shepard and I scheduled that weekend to fight against leftover paperwork.”

“You'd rather do paperwork than play Battleship? Garrus, is that really you?”, she teases.

He sighs. “I wish it weren't. If there's another guy with my face and my classification system out there, he can feel free to take over the paperwork for me.”

“Shepard would notice, though.”

“True”, he says, sighs again. “Three weeks, then?”

“The last weekend in May? Sunday, usual time?”

“Yes, that's much better.”


	43. Call Me, Maybe - Picture not so perfect (Garrus)

It takes only a week, though, until he next hears from Tali.

Though 'hear' is the wrong word, it's more 'read' and – most of all – 'see'.

It's Saturday, late afternoon, he and Shepard are taking care of some research for a cold case they're investigating for C-Sec when both their phones ring at the same time. 

He thinks it's a coincidence, initially. It's a picture with a single caption, and he hides behind a cough that the picture's content is very... unexpected to him.

The picture is of Tali in what looks like a bar (it's hard to see behind all the smoke), her wavy hair loose and her cheeks flushed, raising a cocktail glass with a straw and a little umbrella sticking in a slice of pineapple. She looks happy, and that, for one, is nice to see. But there's also that blond-haired guy next to her ('boy' would be a better word, that baby-face can hardly be older than twenty) and another, equally blond guy behind her. And – they hug. However that's possible with the cocktail glasses, but it's there. And to add insult to injury, Tali's lips are in physical contact with one of the boys' cheeks. 

Thoughts pass through his mind without his consent; it's surprisingly hard to look away.

“You've got that picture from Tali, too?”, says Shepard and takes his mind off of trying a face recognition software with that blond-haired boy (after a few years in the business, it's normal to become a bit paranoid, he rationalises). 

Outwardly, however, he tries his best to stay calm, and his best is usually damn good. “Yes. Looks like they make best use of the German alcohol taxes.”

“Looks like they're having tons of fun!”, says Shepard. She sounds amused. “Let's have a drink in the evening, too. We've been responsible the whole damn week and this case starts to annoy me.”

“Sure. Don't tell Kaidan, though, that his cases annoy you.”

“Hey, what's that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing”, he says, half-heartedly. His eyes fall on the picture's caption. 'Tequila Se'lai!', it says. Colleagues from work, probably, and he has already witnessed that Tali gets more… lively, when she's drunk.

He should just be happy and amused, like Shepard. But there's a little something in his … chest? Not his heart, though. Somewhere else. But that something twitches.

She's a friend, it's normal that he's taken by surprise in such a situation. And it's just the cheek. 

He pushes the feeling away, goes back to the research.


	44. Call Me, Maybe - The Morning After (Garrus)

It's Sunday morning when he receives another message from Tali.

_Tali: Did I sent you any weird pictures last night?_

_Garrus: Two words: Tequila Se'lai._

_Tali: Oh my… Keelah. I'm so sorry. I was … intoxicated._

_Garrus: You sent that one to Shepard, too._

_Tali: And to Wrex, and Grunt, and Liara, and Sam, and Gabby, and Ken, and… probably my whole list of contacts. Excuse me, I need to perform damage control._

_Garrus: Good luck *evil grin*_

He has a broad grin on his face when he puts his phone away. 

It rings again a few seconds later.

_Tali: You're terrible._

Maybe she's right – but right now, he feels a little gleeful.

Just a little bit.


	45. Call Me, Maybe  - Fleet and Flotilla (Tali)

Math paper and pencils are so old-school.

She's spent more than half an hour after dinner preparing a few grids for Battleship, felt nearly taken back to her time in school playing Dots and Boxes with her classmates. And now they're lying in front of her – six sheets of paper, six clean, labelled grids, and a red and a blue pen. She's also already positioned her ships for three plays in advance – last time, the three games of chess took until nearly 1am, her time.

It's almost vintage when compared to the computer-aided sessions before, though definitely a nice change of pace. And after losing really bad at Cluedo, and earning back her dignity with winning chess three times in a row, Battleship could at least be something where neither she nor Garrus has any big advantage.

They definitely have a minor score to settle.

At 8pm sharp she dials his number, grids at the ready and playing with a blue pen.

“Sober again?”, Garrus greats her. Of course, he hasn't forgotten about the incident from two weeks ago. Tali herself wishes she'd have less memories about it especially since she also sent those pictures to auntie Raan, which took her a bit more than simple damage control to smooth over. The phone call was rather awkward.

“Does it matter?”, she replies, channelling her annoyance at his smug voice into a disdainful undertone. “I could beat you drunk.”

“Hear, hear. Well, colour me intrigued”, he says. “It's empty threats, of course, but good to hear you've still got a glimmer of hope this won't end in a disaster for the Quarian Flotilla.”

“Says the Turian who's just about to lose his Fleet. And I'll start with the carrier”, she replies teasingly. “B8.”

“And you're first canon shoots right into the deep blue sea”, he says. “My turn. F3.”

“Nothing but hot air. B1.”

“Nothing. E3.”

“You're one to speak about empty threats, there's nothing, again”, she says, makes a blue cross on her own sheet. “A4. How was the week on the Citadel, though?”

“Not particularly remarkable. The Presidium precinct is still keeping us busy. Nothing on A4”, he replies as she marks the field on the other sheet with a red circle. “What about you? I imagine being hungover on a Monday morning isn't the best start into the week?”

“I wasn't hungover on Monday”, she gives back sharply. “And I had the day off, to be exact, we only took the ferry back to Sweden on Monday.”

“Of course”, he says. She wonders briefly if she spots a bit of coldness in his voice. It has to be the phone. “Well, G3 then.”

“That hit something.” And that something, unfortunately, is a part of one of her cruisers. “You won't let me live that picture down, will you. C4.”

“Deep blue sea, again”, he says simply, sounds a little dull. “And you know: Free ammunition. G2.”

“Nothing.” She's partly happy he hasn't figured the position of the cruiser out, another part of her is a little confused where this conversation is leading. “Listen, can we just skip the topic of the photos from last week? You're not the only one enjoying the free ammunition. B4.”

“That's a hit”, he quickly answers; she marks the appropriate square, waiting for his next shot. He takes his time though, which, given the situation on the board, is a bit unusual. “Sorry, Tali. I didn't mean to... well. G4.”

And there goes another part of her cruiser. “Hit”, she says reluctantly. Somehow, the conversation has taken on an odd undertone, something far less light-hearted than their threats and banter in the beginning. “Well, I did bring this onto myself, I suppose. Just for the record, Germans have cocktails worse than Ryncol. B3.”

There's, fortunately, a short laugh on the other end. “That's hard to image considering that Ryncol might just be radioactive. Oh, and hit, by the way. I'll go with G5.”

“Sunk my cruiser”, she says, wrapped in a long sigh.

“What's so bad about those cocktails, then?”

“There's one called Zombie and that's exactly how you feel afterwards. Lasse swears it was the schnapps, but after the Zombie my memories... get more blurry.”

“Lasse”, Garrus says in an odd tone, hard to identify but somehow unlike he usually sounds.

“Yeah, my colleague, you know? The guy I've been kissing on the cheek.”

There's nothing of the expected teasing, no mocking, no comment. Just a little silence on the other end, a deep breath and then: “Ah, so that's his name. And what's your next move?”

It sounds odd again, like two conversations wrapped in one game of Battleship, and somewhere in the back of her mind, she wonders if he sounds still duller than usual and if something's the matter with him. It's probably nothing, just a figment of her mind.

“My next move...? Of course. B5.”

“Nothing there.”

It's just a figment, just some odd mood – everyone's got those. As they go on playing, it vanishes bit by bit until they're back at their usual teasing and levity after Garrus wins the first round, and she quickly pushes away that that oddness has been there at all, preferring to rather enjoy the evening.

 


	46. Call Me, Maybe - Spring Breeze (Tali)

She's lying on her bed on a late Sunday evening, playing with her hair and staring onto the ceiling. The days are getting longer quickly, soon there will be the Midsommar Festivities in Sweden and after that, it's nearly July. Time goes by so fast.

“I've heard about that reference-checking-programme you wrote for Liara, she's pretty ecstatic about it”, Garrus says on the phone. She's called him about an hour ago because Shepard's birthday is nearing and Tali wants – at least monetarily – participate in a present.

It was supposed to be a quick talk, but one word gave the other, and here they are. “It didn't even take all that long to write”, Tali replies. The window's open and a fresh breeze moves through the room. It's so quiet here compared to the Citadel; it can be oppressingly silent, but in moments like these, it's hard to not enjoy it at least a little.

“If that's the case, can you write me one, too? There's a pile of folders on the desk downstairs that I need to cross-check for our current case and I'm definitely not opposed to pushing that onto a computer programme”, Garrus says, half serious, half sarcastic.

“It was for Liara's thesis”, Tali states coldly, despite grinning into the phone. “You're just lazy.”

“I wouldn't call it lazy”, Garrus says, suppressing a sigh. “It's just that I've got other things to do, too.”

“What about Shepard? Ask her for help.”

“She's... busy”, Garrus drawls.

“Look at the bright side: if you've got a lot to do, means business is running, doesn't it?”, she gives back. He seems genuinely frustrated, at least a little, and she doesn't want to make it harder by stringing him along even more.

Now, Garrus sighs for real. “Not the kind of 'busy' I meant.” Then, as if thinking twice about his words, he adds: “That doesn't sound right. She's... otherwise preoccupied.”

“You make that sound rather ominous”, Tali says. She can't think of a reason why Shepard wouldn't participate in the work; apart from splitting some responsibilities, she and Garrus are practically inseparable when working. “Are there so many jobs that you split them between the two of you?”

“No, it's a more private matter... forget I said anything, Tali. I didn't want this conversation to drift off into that direction.”

“Which direction are we even talking about?”, Tali says, feeling a little miffed because apparently, Garrus knows more than she does and it irks her that he baits her with it, however unwanted that may be. But then, a thought crosses her mind. “Wait – you're still working for the Presidium precinct, are you not?”

Garrus' “Yeah” is again wrapped in a long sigh.

“With Detective... what was his name, Alenko?”

“Kaidan”, Garrus replies, and judging by the way he makes the name sound, Tali understands.

Suddenly, she feels the same spring breeze the window lets in in her belly and turns around on her bed. “Are they dating?”, it escapes her.

“I would think so”, Garrus gives back.

“You could've told me!”, Tali says in half-faked disappointment.

“That's not my job, Tali”, he replies in a rather mild tone. “And don't get me wrong: Kaidan's alright, and Shepard deserves to be happy. It's just... they're … behaving a little erratic, both of them.”

“Ah... so it's a fresh thing?”, Tali asks, not masking her excitement.

“About a week since Shepard told me, but honestly, Ash and I had bets going since at least a month.”

“Who's Ash?”

“Sorry, Kaidan's partner. Ashley Williams.”

“What?” Now Tali sits up straight in her bed while Garrus lets out a disgruntled noise at her loud reply. “Ashley Williams? You know her?! She's the best at Armax Arena!”

At this, Garrus chuckles a little. “She's pretty good, isn't she. Jimmy Vega's on her heel, though, in the current pro-league standings.”

Slowly, Tali lies back down on her bed, digesting the news. She's been getting hooked on Armax Arena lately, especially on the pro-league.“So: Shepard's got a boyfriend you didn't tell me about sooner; you know Ashley Williams, which you _also_ didn't tell me sooner... and you still want me to write a programme for you?”

“Hey, you make me sound like an unreliable gossip monger”, he replies. He doesn't sound hurt at all, though.

“Well I have to get my news from _somewhere_ ”, she teases. “And while we're at it: How does he look?”

“Who?”

“Kaidan Alenko, of course”, she says dismissively. “And what's he for a person?”

“Just hack C-Sec's database and look for his picture”, Garrus answers flatly. She's, of course, already on her way to her computer. “And otherwise, he's a decent guy. I guess you'll get to know him soon enough.”

“Are you condoning illegal activities here?”, she says just to tease him a bit more.

“You're already sitting at your computer, I hear you typing”, he replies. He chuckles, she hears it from his voice even though she's already half-immersed in her encryption. “No need to try to prevent that.”

“Don't think you're off the hook with Ashley Williams, though. I want to meet her”, Tali says, very finally, while still typing. “Maybe she has a few tricks for my shotgun training.”

“You planning on beating Grunt and Wrex next time the empty bottles attack _Kalros & Co_?”

“To be realistic I'd say I just don't want to lose really badly, I'm out of practise”, she says. She's entered C-Sec's personnel files while Garrus makes a disappointed noise. She finds the Detective in question easily. “Oh, he's handsome.”

“So I've heard”, Garrus drawls. Tali can't help it, she has to giggle at the sound. “That's the major tenor on the precinct as well.”

“Am I sensing some annoyance there, or are you jealous?”, she jokes. It's true, though; Kaidan Alenko does look pretty good; smooth dark hair and nice cheekbones and all. And he has kind brown eyes, they're hard to overlook, even on the simple photograph in his file.

“Jealous? Spirits, no”, Garrus says. “It just gets repetitive quickly – believe me, Shepard's remarked on that particular topic often enough in the last weeks.”

“She's really all over him, isn't she”, Tali says. “I had this once when I was studying in Thessia, my dorm mate fell for one of her fellow students. She didn't talk about anything other than this girl from her Literature Class for an entire month.”

“Preserve me”, Garrus mutters, then takes a deep breath. “You know, Turians call this 'puppy license'. For a few weeks, new couples are left alone, no complaints allowed towards the couple.”

“Pretty common concept, Quarians do that, too. We just don't call it that way. Six weeks, roundabout.”

And now that she's already in C-Sec's database, Tali can also quickly have a look at Ashley Williams' file – it's a bit of a shame that she didn't have that idea sooner. Williams is simply a delight to watch on Armax Arena; both graceful and very, very fierce. Maybe Tali could find out something interesting from her file.

“Two weeks”, Garrus says flatly. “Not a day more. Then I shall be back to my sacred duty as her flat mate...”

“... and tease her?”

“Exactly.” There's a satisfied undertone in his voice that makes Tali grin. She takes a look at her watch after registering that Ashley Williams is not that much older than she is – just twenty-seven.

It's nearly ninety minutes now that she and Garrus are talking.

“Garrus, what are you actually doing right now?”

“Lying on my bed, staring out of the window. Why?”

It's nothing special, she thinks; nothing unusual to spend a long phone-talk lying on a bed instead of... repairing drones, playing Battleship, eating, or... what they usually do.

But still, thinking they both are, for once, doing nothing else (at least nothing serious) but talking to each other is... she doesn't quite now what it is, but it feels rather nice.

“Oh nothing. Just didn't hear any screwdrivers clicking today.”

“Now that you mention it, the drone could probably stand a calibration.”

He's teasing her, she hears that; only chuckles into the phone in response. “How often are you going to do that, anyway?”

“Hasn't been all that often lately.”

It takes another two hours before she hangs up and goes to sleep. He's never stood up from his bed, either.


	47. Call Me, Maybe - Tiebreaker (Garrus)

“This can't be true!”, Tali nearly shouts.

Pre-emptively, he's put his phone on loud and it's lying next to him on the coffee table; he's anticipated something like this. Well, not _this_ per se, but Tali getting swept away by the action and threatening his ear drums.

But she's right, of course; and he can only think of one way of expressing the whole situation: Fate's got a pretty odd sense of humour. But at least, it has one at all.

All their little games over the last months; Cluedo, the chess-fiasco, Battleship and their little rounds of 'Who am I?' that mostly ran over messages – and now, at the beginning of July, they're at a draw with total wins (he thinks it's mostly because he's lousy at chess, apparently). They arranged for an afternoon watching the Armax Arena pro-league finals together, betting both on the overall ranking after this last event.

Tali of course made a bet that Ashley Williams would win the season. And Garrus, all personal feelings aside, bet on James Vega – the guy looks like a finisher, someone who'd give it his all plus 20% in the finals, even though in the ranking, he has been listed below Williams by a small margin.

It had to be one of those two; one of them _had_ to make the season. And whoever of them would have made the right bet would win their little gaming contest. Simple as that.

But now...

“The season can't end in a tie!”, Tali says, still as loud.

James Vega indeed won the finals, but not by enough points to out-compete Williams and now they're tied for the title of this season's pro-league Champion at Armax Arena.

“It's technically allowed”, Garrus says, though he still stares at the screen, a little flabbergasted himself. “It's a sport, and things like draws happen.”

“I was so sure Williams would make it!”, Tali replies in a frustrated voice. On the TV screen, Ash Williams and James Vega shake each others' hands as the referee announces both of them as Champion. “She's clearly the better shot!”

Something about the way she says that is making him smile. “Depends on the weapon”, he says calmly. “You haven't seen Ash with a sniper rifle yet.”

“Rub it under my nose that you know her and I don't.” She sounds as if she's sulking a little, though how much of it is actually real is hard to say over the phone.

“We still got to face it – it's a tie. Means – we, too, are at a draw. Nothing changed.”

“Don't remind me”, Tali mutters. “I was so sure I'd have defeated you by tonight and we could put this ad acta.”

“Come on, in a certain way, this is kind of funny”, he says, switches off the TV. He doesn't need to see the ceremony, he should rather clean up a little before Shepard comes back from her afternoon walk to Kaidan's (which has already been taking more than four hours at this point).

Tali sighs so intensely he's pretty sure she overdoes it on purpose. Then, however, she giggles a bit. It's a nice sound. “Well, it's not _unfunny_. Still unsatisfactory.”

“Agreed. Seems we need another tiebreaker. Any suggestions?”

“Hm... I don't know. Dots and Boxes isn't fun on the phone and... oh.” There's a sudden pause, and it doesn't bode well. “It's... July 1, isn't it?”, she then says weakly.

“Yes?”

“Means, next week is July 8 and so on... I'm sorry, Garrus. I don't think I'll find enough time for a tiebreaker in the next weeks.”

He would lie to himself pretending to not be disappointed, but she doesn't need to know that. She already sounds unhappy, and he doesn't have to add to that, as well. “Trouble at work?”

“No trouble, but preparations. I'm going to a conference next week, the flight is on Saturday. I'll be in France for a week then, and after that, I'll have to write a paper, and there's going to be a farewell party and... then it's already August.”

“You'll come back in August”, he states, only notices later how stupid that sounds because it's so obvious. “We'll have more than enough time to hold a tiebreaker then. Live.”

“Of course we'll do”, she says.

He has the feeling she fights off a little disappointment at the unwanted break as well.


	48. Call Me, Maybe - Almost There (Garrus)

July passes by then and he's probably just as busy as Tali with all the stuff that Shepard brings in from the precinct. They text a few times, but it's never something big.

But before he really realises that it's only a week left until August, she phones him once more, rather unexpectedly.

It's an odd timing, too; Wednesday at lunch time. And it's on the landline of the office, and he only doesn't use the formal greeting because he recognises the number.

“Tali?”, he greets her, admittedly a bit confused.

“Hey Garrus, is Shepard there, too?”, she says. She sounds like business.

“No, she's at the Presidium precinct. Having lunch with a certain Detective.”

It's enough to distract Tali a little. “Sounds like it's becoming serious.”

“That's what I'd guess”, he replies, allowing himself a grin. It's his prerogative as Shepard's best friend and flatmate to make fun of her when she's behaving a bit like a teenaged girl around Kaidan Alenko, and the time for adhering to the code and paying mind to a 'puppy licence' is over now.

There is a short silence on the other end that sounds as if Tali is torn between asking further and getting back to business. “Anyway”, she then says, half hesitatingly. “Do you and Shepard have time next Friday night?”

He has a quick look into the calendar. “Uh… yes, why?”

“The short version is that I have to take an earlier flight and will come back to the Citadel on Friday instead of Sunday. But my aunt is out of town on a lengthy proceeding, and nobody else is there to pick me up and…” There is a short pause before she continues, a little sheepish. “I hate taking cabs, especially Friday night. After about twelve hours in several planes and possibly jet-lagged.”

“So you… want Shepard and me to come pick you up?”

“That would be wonderful”, she admits.

“Well… when do you arrive?”

“11pm”, she says dully. It's probably part of the whole problem.

“From my side, that's okay. Have to talk to Shepard about it, though – not that she's taken on another case over lunch that involves us infiltrating a night club or something. Not that that's very likely.”

There's a sigh of relief from the other end. “Thanks, Garrus.”

It's the last time they have a phone call during Tali's stay in Sweden.


	49. Call Me, Maybe - Perfect (Tali)

When the day finally comes and she's flying back home, she's too tired to be excited. The last days have gone by in an odd mixture of writing the last bits of the publication and having multiple farewell parties, and all the sleep she hasn't managed to squeeze in between, she makes good on on the planes. She arrives in Frankfurt after what feels like a nap, sleeps again while she waits for her next plane and doesn't notice anything from flying over the Atlantic because she's sleeping again. 

She wakes up about an hour before the scheduled landing, feeling at least remotely well rested. It's also then that the first signs of excitement begin to manifest in her stomach.

In a bit more than an hour, she's going to see Shepard and Garrus again. In not even half a day, her aunt will be back, and she's going to have a little tea party with Sam and Gabby on Sunday afternoon. Sweden is behind her now, with all the good things she has seen and learned. She doesn't have many plans for the future – she's going to take Professor Adams' offer and get back to her old position (and the shared desk with Gabby) before figuring out what she'll do next. And at least for the moment, the uncertainty doesn't frighten her.

The Citadel with all its uncountable lights comes into sight about twenty minutes before the landing, she marvels how huge it looks. She's spend the last six months in a town with not even 200,000 inhabitants, and now she's returning to the anthill that is the Union's capital.

She wonders if it should feel strange in any form – coming back – but in the end, it doesn't. She's still Tali, and this is still home.

The plane lands as scheduled, she moves through the hustle and bustle, gets her luggage (two suitcases and a travel bag; and her backpack, of course), and then, she's outside the terminals, searching the crowd for familiar faces.

It takes her a bit before she finds them; a short woman with red hair like an alarm button and a leather jacket, and a tall man in a banker-blue button-up shirt.

She's running before she knows it, hugs Shepard fervently.

“Good to have you back, Tali”, Shepard says. She's smiling broadly, has gotten a little tan and even more freckles, and seems incredibly relaxed.

“It's good to be back”, Tali replies. And for the first time, she feels it's really true. “Thanks for coming.”

“No problem, can't have you arrive here all on your own.”

“We thought of bringing Wrex for a proper welcoming committee, but he didn't fit in the back seat”, says Garrus, and Tali's eyes only now move over to him.

Unlike Shepard, he is still pale, still wears the same glasses and doesn't seem to have changed all that much. But he smiles a little when their eyes meet, they're also still just as blue and as piercing as they used to be. Looking at them makes her heart skip a beat; this doesn't exactly feel the same like six months ago.

She collects herself quickly and replies: “Don't tell him that you think he's fat. That's not going to end well for you.”

“I never said he's fat, those are your words”, Garrus counters without hesitation. He clears his throat before he offers her his hand. “Good to see you, Tali. Welcome back.”

She reaches out to take his hand like automatic, but then she remembers their goodbye from months ago, and all their talks on the phone, all that odd familiarity between them. A handshake doesn't do it justice. Before she can stop herself, she ignores his hand, takes a step towards him, and hugs him, too.

He smells of something metallic and a cool, minty aftershave, but he feels surprisingly warm. His muscles tense; she's surprised him and almost wants to let go as he releases a long breath and relaxes, finally returning the hug.

She's back home, with the people she cares about most; and no matter how awesome Sweden was, she's missed them all. But now, she closes her eyes when her head touches Garrus' shoulder, getting lost in something that – for the moment – feels like it couldn't be more perfect.


	50. Intermezzo - Chit-Chat (Garrus)

Something about Tali is different when she comes back. 

She sure looks the same; long wavy hair, still wearing college hoodies, just that this one has the name of the University written on it in Swedish. She's still … enthusiastic (or again, as a voice in his head reminds him when he thinks back of how stressed she used to be when she made the decision to go to Sweden in the first place), and the way she hugs Shepard – as if she's flying and practically radiating energy – also reminds him very much of the girl who used to step into their office about one and a half years back.

But then she hugs him, too; and Garrus can't really grasp how that makes him feel. It's unexpected, very much so, and takes him completely off guard. He tries to smooth things over when they part, act like always, but he keeps looking at her on the way back to the car and he can't stop it. She doesn't seem to notice, which is good, she's chattering with Shepard all the time, telling stories about Lund and German alcohol taxes. But Shepard throws him a look at one point, that look where she raises her brows and grins. It's an unsettling, almost knowing grin like a red-headed cat.

It's probably just the fact that Tali's back and he hasn't seen her in half a year. That's all.

But he still catches himself looking at her in the car when he has to stop at traffic lights; he drives while Shepard sits on the back seat and Tali next to him leans back to continue the chatter.

“And really, you wouldn't believe how small Lund is!”, Tali says for what feels like the twentieth time when they drive on the freeway through the Presidium. “I checked it, it's about the size and population of the lower Wards, but it's a town on it's own – can you imagine that?”

“Well, the lower Wards do have their own government as well, sort of”, Shepard replies. “When you think of it, the Citadel is nothing more than a couple of smaller sized towns having grown together into a very big one.”

“Isn't every big town?”, he says. It's the first time he tries to enter the conversation; he's followed so far, but has been pre-occupied with driving. “Cipritine is like that, too.”

“But there isn't even a close town that Lund could grow together _with”_ , says Tali. She shifts on her seat, turns her attention back to the front of the car.

They have to stop at a traffic light again, far back in the line of cars. Even at this time of day, the Citadel doesn't sleep.

“I mean it's just…“, says Tali, but doesn't continue. Instead, she moves a little closer to him, eyes narrowed in concentration.

It makes him a bit uncomfortable.

“Are those… Garrus, are those grey hair?”

In the back seat of the car, Shepard explodes with laughter. He ignores it, it's not the first time and won't be the last – it's frankly annoying, but he wouldn't have it any other way.

The fact that he's greying, however, he can't deny. “Yes”, he says plainly.

Tali throws a look at the traffic lights, and since they are still red, her head moves another few centimetres closer.

He's starting to feel a little like an exhibit and clears his throat. Tali takes the hint and falls back to her seat.

“Just for the record”, she says matter-of-factly. “You're twenty-eight?”

“My father went grey with twenty-five”, he replies plainly. Much to his elation, the traffic lights change to yellow and the line of cars is slowly starting to move again. “And since I unfortunately take a lot after him, I consider myself lucky.”

“You should've heard Wrex' reaction“, says Shepard in between another wave of giggles, and this time, Tali laughs along, too.

“I can imagine! He's not letting you live that down, is he?”

“Of course not”, Garrus gives back tersely. “But I guess I wouldn't either if age wouldn't seem to apply to me with a good forty years more on my back.” And still very much auburn hair, no signs of grey, no signs of hair loss.

At least, his father – at his ripe age of sixty-six – doesn't show any form of hair loss, either. Garrus might not be perturbed by a bit of grey, but losing his hair early is something else entirely.

Tali and Shepard of course don't let it go quickly, which means Tali asks a few questions and Shepard does her damnest to encourage further ones, probably her method of getting back at him because of his teasing regarding Kaidan Alenko. But when they leave the Presidium towards the Embassy Quarters, where Tali's aunt lives, they let it finally go and talk about something else (namely Kaidan) again.

There's another awkward moment, though, when they unload the trunk in front of Shala'Raan's house. They're under a street light, and Tali takes the opportunity to observe the grey spots on the sides and back of his head.

She initially says nothing, but when she's already said her goodbyes and they agreed on having a 'Welcome back' party with Wrex and the others at some point in the next week, she smiles at him. Not grins, not smirks, but smiles. And says: “I think grey would suit you.” Earnestly. Without double meaning.

It's thoroughly confusing.

And back at home – after some grins from the red-headed cat that is his co-driver on the way back – he asks himself why he still remembers where exactly her hair has brushed his cheek back on the airport, and what her body has felt like in his arms. And why she's making compliments now.

There is an odd thought in his head, rather outlandish and more a suspicion. It's been lurking there for some time yet, but he usually dismisses it. This time, it's not as simple, though.

But it's still not making any sense.


	51. Intermezzo - Third Time's a Charm (Tali)

It feels so good to be surrounded by all of her old friends again, to not have to speak on the phone all the time. Tali spends the entire Saturday after her return just being lazy with her aunt, running around in her pajamas, cooking together and watching a movie. In the evening, they visit Veetor together. 

He's doing considerably well, and it turns out he hasn't needed much of the drugs he has gotten from Mouse. He handled the situation well, promised to keep away from the Wards for a while. Actually, a little while after the incident with Mouse, Veetor got to know a young Quarian therapist, who, after getting to know Veetor a little better and learning of his desire to work with children, offered to mentor him should he decide to give college a try – and with a little encouragement from Tali and Shala'Raan, he did and applied for a scholarship. College used to be out of question for him due to his problems with focussing, but now that he has set his mind to it and has a little help from someone experienced, Tali is pretty sure he will find a way to make it work.

On Sunday, Tali meets Gabby and Sam, and the afternoon soon turns into evening and the evening into night. They only part ways because they all need to start working on Monday – well, Tali technically doesn't have to because her new contract with Professor Adams only starts on August 1, which is on Wednesday. 

More little encounters with her Citadel friends and colleagues follow over the next week; a lunch meeting with Liara in the cafeteria, a shotgun-free stomach-training session with Wrex and Grunt (in light of her now infamous 'Tequila Se'lai!' picture – Tali's sure Garrus would have had his fun as Wrex and Grunt tease her with it as well). The wave of excitement and enthusiasm at being back home culminates on Saturday with another party at _Kal'Ros and Co.,_ which apparently has been planned by her friends (Shepard on the forefront) at least a month in advance.

It starts just a little differently than her farewell-party; the bottle-shooting contest that Wrex threatened her with just a few days before is still held – but in contrast to the last time, the bottles are all at the same place and not all over the room, and Shepard participates as well. And wins, what prompts Grunt to challenge her to another fistfight. 

It seems like parties at Wrex' always have a similar order of events. Tali retreats towards the table with Liara, Sam, Gabby and Ken while Shepard and Grunt get ready – this time, they don't rope Garrus and Dagg into the action as well and just 'duke it out like real men' (as Grunt calls it) – in the middle of the taproom.

The fight ends in a timeout, which isn't particularly good for Grunt's overall mood, but relatively safe for all the other people in the room – Gabby especially doesn't seem to find all the fighting amidst the eating and drinks all that amusing.

After she treats Grunt to a glass of Ryncol to make peace, Shepard joins Tali's table, talks with Sam about a revenge at chess first. Much to Tali's disappointment, Shepard hasn't brought Kaidan Alenko with her to the party.

“He's a bit... prim, at times. About things like 'my girlfriend is friends with a clan chief who regularly deals with the Krogan mafia and has half a food in shady dealings' and that. I'm preparing him for that. Gently”, Shepard says when Tali brings the topic up. And considering Shepard has a few new bruises thanks to her encounter with Grunt, it seems reasonable.

“Garrus wasn't so fond of that back in the day, either, was he?”, she gives back. “So you've at least got experience with charming cops into making friends with Krogan clan heads.”

Shepard chuckles a bit at that and nods towards the bar. “Sometimes I think that worked out a little too well.”

The men in question actually sit at the bar together, and the multiple empty shot glasses in front of them that are moved back and forth between a beer glass and a salt shaker make it look like they're reviewing military tactics.

“Think of your aspirations at Armax”, Tali says while her eyes still stick to the two men. Garrus doesn't wear his usual bland blue button-up shirt today, but a dark navy one. It's a nice colour. “It's better your team gets along well, I guess.”

“Not so good if they're planning a bank robbery together, or Maker knows what they're doing there.”

Tali snorts a bit into her drink. “As if Garrus would rob a bank.”

“Well, he wouldn't, true”, Shepard says. She turns her head a bit, such that she now looks at Tali from the corners of her eyes, grinning. “But that doesn't mean he wouldn't _plan_ a robbery – you know he likes strategy games.”

There's a funny feeling inside Tali's stomach when Shepard winks at her before she gets up. “I'm getting drinks, and then I want a revenge, Ms. Traynor.”

Shepard's undertone doesn't escape Liara's attention, who raises her brow a little at Tali. “Anyone up for a game of poker?”, Tali says a little forcefully, her thoughts linger at that funny feeling and she definitely isn't up to musing about it now.

While Shepard loses another time against Sam; Liara, Gabby and Ken take Tali's suggestion and the four of them start a round of poker. Liara turns out to be either very fortunate, or very clever (and very good at pretending she isn't) – because she wins every single one of their first few rounds, accompanied by various colourful Scottish swear words courtesy of Ken.

It threatens to become a rather dull endeavour to try and beat Liara until they are joined by Garrus and Wrex, who – while having given up on their strategy games from the bar – still argue about military tactics. At least, they bring in a breath of fresh air that hopefully mixes things up at the table.

And both have a very good poker face, which apparently also makes things more difficult for Liara. She loses the next round to Wrex after only barely outmanoeuvring Garrus.

He seems to take it with more amusement than actual ill blood. “I see you've been practising, Liara.”

“Poker is no simple game of luck”, Liara replies, the ghost of a rather untypical, almost Wrex-like grin moving over her face. “And since that is the case, I refuse to let someone pull me over the barrell like Shepard did last time.”

“Very commendable”, Garrus says lightly, then has a look at his cards and throws a few credits into the centre of the table. “Sadly in vain, though. I'm sure I figured out your tells.”

“I thought you know a lady has no tells”, Tali enters the conversation, and raises by another few credits. “Though I refuse to lose to Liara, too.”

In the end, however, the only one who regularly seems to find a cure to Liara's playing style is Wrex, everyone else – including Garrus – loses more than they win.

“If you have nothing more to go, I fear you're out, Garrus”, Liara says sweetly as he searches his pockets for more money.

“Damn, I knew there's a problem with paying with credit cards”, he mutters.

“Bet that brandy you had with you”, says Wrex. “Was pretty expensive from what I saw.”

“No... the brandy, uh... I can't bet that.” For a second, Garrus' eyes fly over to Tali and the funny feeling is back. “Okay, you won, Liara. I'm out.”

Tali thinks back to the brandy, to the evening in last November when she made her decision about Sweden. It was probably the first time she felt like she and Garrus shared more than lactose-intolerance.

When she is honest with herself, they also share more than their difficult relationships to their fathers, though she isn't quite sure what exactly it is. But the thought doesn't leave her that quickly. It sticks with her through the last rounds of poker, where her eyes drift off to Garrus more than once. Hopefully, he's too distracted with following Liara's and Wrex' final confrontations to notice.

Then, after the poker, Grunt turns up the music and tables and chairs are brought to the sides of the room to make place for a makeshift dance floor. Shepard, who lost against Sam another few times, dances about as bad as she plays chess – it's unintentionally hilarious to watch her move her body without any sense of rhythm or pace, but with all the more enthusiasm. Grunt mocks her for it, but he dances only mildly less out of tune and only looks less awkward because he moves rather slowly.

Tali dances close to Sam and Liara at first (while Ken tries a slow waltz on a disco tune to impress Gabby, who at least finds it rather amusing as Ken leads her over the whole dance floor), plays a little guessing game with the two of them.

“Alright, so you're a halogen”, says Tali towards Liara, whose turn it is now.

“Yes, that is correct.”

“And you're not in one of the first two periods”, says Sam.

“Yes.”

“Are you liquid at room temperature?”, asks Tali. A little sigh by Liara answers her question. “That means you're Bromine.”

“Yes, I am”, Liara says. “I think that was too simple.”

“At least I know I won't pick Mercury next”, Sam says. “Maybe we should go over to the Lanthanoids.”

“Or we branch out and allow chemical compounds”, Tali says. “Though guessing proteins judging by the number of oxygen and hydrogen atoms can't be fun.”

“Acids then, maybe?”, Sam suggests. From the other end of the room, Tali sees Garrus approaching. He has so far stood a bit to the side talking to Wrex, and he still has a glass of vodka in hand.

“Am I getting this right: you're playing 'Who am I?' with elements?”, he says as he reaches them.

“Are we talking that loud?”, asks Liara carefully.

“I heard a few 'Erbium's and 'Uranium's from where I stood.”

“No fair that you join us with a drink in hand and don't get us any”, Tali says.

She isn't serious about this, but to her surprise, he answers: “You're right, shame on me. So – anyone want a drink?”

“No thank you. I had enough experience with Krogan specialities last time”, says Liara. “And I can't use a hangover at the moment.”

“I wouldn't say 'no' to a drink”, says Sam and Tali simply agrees to another glass of vodka, as well.

Garrus' button-up shirt really does look rather nice, and it's not only a different colour than usual. It's a different fit, too, suits him better; which she has enough opportunity to assure herself of as he is on his way to the bar and back and her eyes follow him without her conscious consent. But the way the dim light highlights some parts of his shoulders is... somewhat captivating. Not that she minds it. Running in the early morning and visiting the shooting range definitely aren't the only kinds of sport he's doing.

His hand brushes over hers shortly when he hands her the drink, just by accident; but a shiver moves from the spot on her hand through her arm and into her chest. It's an odd feeling, not entirely unfamiliar, not unwanted, but... unexpected.

She hasn't seen him in so long, but she's felt things like this before while on the phone, because of some things he said, because they just wasted their time together once or twice. Because even though she used to be six time zones away, he felt so close to her.

And now he really is that close. It's not just his hand on the glass; while they're dancing he's next to her and there is this one time when they bump a little into a each other at a particularly fast song. The shiver is back in an instant, now spreading from her shoulder through her whole body. She can't remember it being like this before Sweden.

She tries not to muse on that feeling too much, but it doesn't leave easily – and she actually finds that she doesn't mind it not leaving.

The longer they dance, the more the night goes over into morning, the more she realises it's been a long time since she's felt this light, this relaxed. The party is just as wild as their last one; Shepard has a dance-off against Grunt somewhen in the early hours of morning much to the amusement (and second-hand embarrassment, as well) of everyone around, Wrex tells stories about Tuchanka, and even Sam, Gabby and Ken stay for a few hours of sleep this time when everyone decides to call it a night as the skies already turn bright outside.

It's around lunchtime Tali wakes up in a guest room she's shared with Shepard, Sam and Liara; of which only the latter two are still sleeping. Liara won't like this; she's still finalising her thesis and probably had other plans for the morning. Tali thinks of waking her up – but then again, maybe she should find coffee first. And Shepard, who promised to get her home.

It's almost eerily quiet at the bar compared to the riot from last night, only some of Grunt's cousins are up handing out Krogan hangover cures, that – according to Shepard – entirely consist of raw eggs and blood pudding. At least the oddly unsavoury reddish brown colour and the syrup-like consistency of this 'cure' tell Tali that she's probably right about this.

Tali declines a glass of it with thanks as she sits down at the bar, rather asks Dagg about breakfast. As it turns out, Shepard and Grunt are currently getting everyone breakfast from a close convenience store. “Call'em if you want more than five eggs, a packet of bacon and some pieces of toast with chocolate spread. Or some sausages, old man Wrex is getting the barbecue ready in the backyard.”

She's a little confused at the thought of having barbecue for breakfast, but then remembers that she actually just wanted some coffee, maybe a pot so that Liara and Sam can have some when they wake up. Dagg just gestures her into the kitchen at her request for coffee.

As fate would have it, she's not alone when she comes in. Garrus leans at a table with a coffee machine, a cup with a steaming liquid in the one hand, his phone in the other. His back is turned towards the door, and he probably didn't hear her enter. Whoever he's talking to, he doesn't seem particularly pleased.

“No, of course not”, he says with an exasperated undertone. “No, I don't think this should escalate either, that is exactly why --- “ Maybe she should leave. “Tell me, since when are we that big on family traditions, anyway?”

Ah, his family. She turns back towards the door, wants to leave as Garrus sighs into his phone. “Listen, Sol, I don't really have time for this right now. ... Yes, I'll think about it. Bye.”

It would be weird if she would leave now, wouldn't it? She's hardly done with musing about this as Garrus takes note of her.

“Morning”, he says easily, now into her back.

“Sorry, I didn't want to listen in... I was already leaving”, she says. She probably sounds a bit like a child being caught with a cookie jar in hand and crumbs around her mouth.

“No problem, it was just a phone call, nothing that important”, he gives back casually. “Coffee?”

“That would be wonderful”, she mutters. Her head still seems like it didn't really get the message that it should be awake now because the rest of her is, too.

“I just figured out where the cups are”, Garrus says and gestures towards a small cabinet hanging on his eye-level. Next to it on the floor is, fittingly, a stepladder. “The shot glasses are there, by the way.” He gestures towards a second cabinet the size of a dish washer, standing on the floor and filled over and over with shot glasses.

“I suppose asking if there's any big pots is in vain?”

Garrus spares her the stepladder, takes out a cup from the high-hanging cabinet and hands it to her. “I guess it's beer glasses if you want more coffee.”

“All a question of priorities”, Tali says dully and sighs a little. “Hangover cures, barbecue and shot glasses; I have weird friends.”

Garrus chuckles a little at this, leans back onto the table with the coffee machine as Tali gets it running once more. “You certainly keep interesting company”, he says in his smooth voice. She has to get used to it again without the phone between them. “As do we all, I suppose.”

Tali decides to stay a little in the kitchen with him, has her coffee next to him without much talking. He seems distracted, too; looks at his phone from time to time, frowns a bit.

Maybe it was something important after all. She thinks to have heard the name 'Sol' – isn't that his sister's nickname? “You can tell me, you know”, she says as he puts the phone away another time and sighs once more. Then, her sudden rush of boldness vanishes and leaves behind the feeling that she maybe went too far. “I mean... if there's something you need to... talk about.”

And that sounded terribly cheesy.

He looks at her for a second, but much to her surprise, he doesn't muster her like he used to do before Sweden. “I don't think you want to deal with my daddy issues, but thank you”, he says. He tries to sound casual about it, but somehow she knows it's just that: a try.

She shrugs her shoulders softly. “You always make that sound so dismissive, 'daddy issues'. As if having a difficult relation to a father is something to laugh at.”

He exhales a mirthless laugh. “Do I?”

“Yes.”

“That's not what I wanted to... sorry”, he says. When he continues, he weighs his words with care. “It was about his birthday. Solana wants me to come for a visit, but we never celebrate birthdays. It's another rather thin-veiled attempt to get my father and me talking. I don't like it when she tries to mend things, that's all; it's a thing between me and my father.”

“I understand that”, Tali gives back. She honestly hasn't expected him to tell her what his phone call was about, after all. “But I guess your sister just means well?”

“How's that saying?” Garrus wraps these words in a long sigh, has the last bits of his coffee. “'The road to hell is paved with good intentions?' But I guess you're right.”

It's probably better they leave it at that, Tali feels a bit as if she's already pried too much. “But again: I don't care if it's daddy or sister issues; I'm here if you need to talk.”

When he answers, Garrus sounds a bit surprised at himself. “I know. Thanks, Tali.” After a short pause in which he looks at his watch and the surroundings, he adds: “Why not. Now's as good a time as any. Care for a Turian hangover cure?”

She hasn't seen this turn of events coming, but his voice is far more light-hearted now. He actually smirks a little. “Why not?”, she half-asks, half-states.

“Then get us some shot glasses, I'll be back in a minute.”

She does as he asked – though she gets the distinct impression that if Turian hangover cures fit into a shot glass, they must be worse than the Krogan ones.

When he returns, though, he has brought no suspicious substance (she internally agreed on some sort of hot sauce) – but a bottle of Turian brandy. Judging by the bottle's design, it's an expensive one.

“Is that the brandy Wrex spoke about yesterday?”, she asks.

“Yes.” Garrus smirks a little as he opens it. “Got it from a Turian client a while back and thought I spare it for special occasions.”

There it is again – he hasn't even touched her, so why is the shiver in her belly back?

“And considering your last 'special alcohol' at such a party was Ryncol and that German cocktail, I thought you might want to try this. It's a better one than the one I usually keep at home.”

He doesn't think anything by this, she's sure of that. He's just being nice, just ... thinking of her. There's no reason he shouldn't be, after all.

The brandy is smoky and smooth, has less of a bitter after-taste than the one she already knows. But it's also definitely stronger; and definitely much, much better than Ryncol. Or the Zombie.

She refrains from a second glass, though. Garrus decides to take the rest back home, and when he promises to save her at least one glass, the feeling the brandy left in her and the resurfacing shiver begin to mix with each other.

Something else is there, too; a thought, a whisper in the back of her mind. She thought of seeing him again, of course; after all those hours spend on the phone. Thought that things would fall back into place, but now she asks herself whether it's still... the same place. If it's just that things have changed, or if...

It's when they say goodbye that things start to make sense.

Everyone who crashed at _Kal'Ros & Co_ has breakfast a little later before they go their separate ways. Liara is taken home by Sam this time, but says, “I'm glad you and Garrus get along so well now”, before she leaves. Tali isn't sure if there's an undertone, muses on it in the car back to the Embassies.

Shepard drives today, Tali is in the co-driver's seat, Garrus behind her. Shepards talks a lot, about her adventure with Grunt in the convenience store, a little about how Kaidan would find them all so weird before he'd inevitable fall in love with Wrex' charm, but Tali only half listens.

At her aunt's house, she naturally hugs Shepard, wants to hug Garrus, too; but suddenly stops when she notices that he tries the same: a slightly awkward, long-limbed hug. She almost takes a step back, stops herself in time; but the damage is done – he's noticed her reluctance and looks a bit taken aback.

She doesn't even know why she's hesitating. 

“Sorry, I thought we're at the hugging stage”, he says, and now it's obvious he's trying to sound casual about it.

“Hugging stage?”, she just asks, but she feels bad. She didn't intend to confuse him, and she's suddenly acutely aware that Shepard is next to them.

“Isn't that what follows on the stage where you only shake hands?”, he says. “Sorry, I don't know what the policies on hugging are, Turians don't do that all that often.”

He really looks a bit awkward and all she can do for a moment too long is stare at him, notice that Shepard takes a few steps to the side and pretends to have a phone call with someone.

“I thought that I ... overran you, last time”, Tali says quietly. She suddenly wants to avoid his eyes, and feels very warm. “I thought you're... not the hugging type.”

_This. Is. So. Odd._

“I... don't know”, he says slowly. “It's... worth a try?”

She doesn't know if it's actually this she's been waiting for, but it's enough. 

This time, he returns her hug right from the beginning, the shiver in her belly ignites like a fire when his hands brush over her back.

She really likes how this feels, being in his arms; likes that it's so warm, that he smells like mint, now mixed with alcohol and a bit of smoke.

It's all so simple, really; it's almost odd she didn't realise it last week on the airport.

Somewhere between talking on the phone, playing Cluedo and being bored together she's fallen for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Puuuuhhhhh... finally there, at least one part of this ship has realised her feelings :D And I feel this is a very good point for a cliffhanger - I will put this story on hiatus for a while. I have a second writing project at the moment, and I want to continue with it before Garrus and Tali dance around each other for even longer ;) But I'll definitely come back to this, I still have plans for a couple of little episodes.  
> Thanks for everyone who's visited this story so far and to those who left kudos! See you in a bit, or on my Fairy Tail project!


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